Someone Asked “What Is Something You Changed Your Stance On After Learning More About It?”, Here Are 30 Of The Most Fascinating Answers
Have you ever been extremely passionate about a topic just to years later look back and be embarrassed that you ever felt that way? Maybe it was supporting a certain politician or animal rights group in college, but since then you’ve realized they don’t represent your beliefs as much as you once thought. The beauty of being human is that we can form opinions on anything, and those opinions aren’t static.
Last week, Reddit user Pineapple_WarpDrive reached out to fellow members of the Ask Reddit community to pose the question, “What is something you changed your stance on after learning more about it?” And a very interesting conversation was sparked. We’ve gathered some of the most eye-opening responses for you to read right here, and as you make your way through the list, we implore you to keep an open mind. Perhaps your opinions will be changed too!
Then if you’re looking for another Bored Panda piece that’ll get you thinking, we’ve got the perfect one for you to read next right here.
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Understanding why people shake their baby.
Of course it is absolutely horrible and it seems like it should make sense that nobody should even think about doing it but I have an understanding of how it can happen now.
I had my own daughter 4 years ago and swore up and down that nobody but a monster would shake their child but let me tell you that sleep deprivation is hell and it is terrifying.
When my daughter was a newborn, she was crying very hard one particular night and nothing we did seemed to soothe her crying. My insanely sleep deprived brain started trying to take over and I could feel the urge to shake her.
Luckily, I had just enough cognitive function to recognize that I was in a very vulnerable and bad situation. I set my daughter back down in her crib and walked away for a little while so as to wake myself up some more.
That is the most scared I've ever been of what the human brain is capable of.
Absolutely agree! My daughter was a horrific baby. I never shook her but I have had to put her down and walk away. I even called my husband to come home from work one day because I was broken and could not handle it anymore. He was so concerned he actually sent his dad to come because he was much closer. I literally thrust my daughter into his arms and walked out of the house. Walked and cried for an hour until I felt better. It's terrifying to be that close to the edge but its also very very common and you are not a crappy parent because of it!!! My daughter is now one of the brightest, happiest 9 year olds I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. It gets better.
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I remember my sister (who remained child free) holding my baby daughter and saying 'you just can't understand how anyone could hurt them, do you' and my husband and I exchanging glances. No, we never came *close* to harming her, but once you've had a baby you understand how someone without the resources to cope could be pushed to the edge. And by resources I include brain function, because how we are treated as babies ourselves affects how different parts of our brain grow, as well as having social support.
I firmly believe every parent thinks about harming their child at least once. Even the best parents who would never intentionally harm their baby will have the fleeting thought or impulse to do so.
Load More Replies... I didn't feel like I wanted to shake my babies, but once, after a particularly hard night I caught myself starting to squeeze my baby's arms just a little too tight. I didn't realize what I was doing, but my tired brain snapped out of the exhaustion just long enough to realize the situation I was in. I put him down and called my mum. I never told her why, but I got the distinct impression that she knew the state I must have been in. She sat on the couch with the baby on her lap and me next to her for a good six or seven hours, until my husband came home. For some reason I couldn't sleep, but sitting still that long,with her, did a world of good. It's one of only a few vivid memories I had of that time, and I really hope my mum knew just what she did for me that day.
My nephew had colic pretty bad and I would watch him so my sister could get some sleep. Even though I just had to bear it for a few hours at a time, I still would feel the urge to put a pillow over his face to make the crying stop. I never wanted kids, and one of the reasons is that I'm convinced I would end up murdering them.
I remember my mother warning me about this; it was really the only advice to raising babies that she handed me without asking. She said, "There is going to come a time when you are frustrated beyond anything you've ever felt before, call me, do not pick the baby up, I'll be there soon." That night came, and I didn't have to say a word when I called, she picked up the phone and said, "I'm on my way." RIP mom and I promise to do the same for my kids when they have their own.
My god. This happened to me with my first born. She wouldn't stop crying while carrying here, she was just a few weeks old and to my frustration I shook her hard and I realized what I just did right after and I felt so sorry and so bad. I had no idea whatsoever of post partum or anything that's brought about by just giving birth. Until this day I regret what happened.
I think the majority of moms regret something. But, it's comforting to know we're not alone in it. I wish someone had told me about the havoc hormones and exhaustion bring about and for just how long.
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I was a single mom at age 20 and full-time college student. Minimal help from my family. I was really doing it alone and I was exhausted. (I remember coming home and crying one night because I had to wash a sink of dishes) One day, I lost my temper, but did not shake my baby. I put him in his crib and walked away. Everyone needs to do the 10 or 15 second countdown and deep breathing. It can save a child from being injured. I agree with the OP. I would never hurt my child but I can see how people get in a situation where they feel like it. It was a tough time, but today my son is a happy young man and I'm very proud of him.
You should be proud of yourself, too, coping with all that on your own x
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I was in the same situation.... luckly for me I was living with my parents and one of my sisters. Who would get up in the middle of the night to help with my baby... told me to "Leave the room", literally pushing me away.... I'm a good mom, but boy crying in the middle of the night, while working full time, while still breastfeeding is just a big NOPE!!!!
I didn’t do birthing classes when I was pregnant, I studied stress and distress - how to keep calm in panicked/limbo states. I was t perfect but when I did meltdown finally it was at myself and my at times my partner while also saying how I knew it was just emotion talking and how I know we’d get through it. My daughter was an amazing baby, but it was exhausting trying to continue at the same achievement pace, which left me exhausted. TLDR - f**k debating about an epidural and magic ‘natural pain free’ birthing techniques, study how to operate under distress and extreme pressure.
I've often said that, after being a parent, I understand why animals sometimes eat their young.
Sleep deprivation sucks. Being a parent of disabled child i did drive my car into a fence because of massive brain fog after few years of disturbed night sleep. I'm just happy it never happened on the road, but probably some stress hormones do their job and wake me up out there.
the urge to physically discipline your children is almost instinctual in some ways. I don't have children of my own but I watch my best friends son often. Maybe it's a product of our own upbringing but when a child goes to grab a hot pan my immediate desire is to smack his hand in order to cause a response in him that he won't forget. I think hitting, punching or in any way really physically hurting the kid is wrong and counterproductive. But the instinct to do it is there. You want them to they remember that this is the result of their behavior. A crying baby is one of the most grating noises on earth and it affects people in a funny way. You just want to look at the kid and go 'WHHHHAT DO YOU WANT??!' You start begging it to stop. Having the sense to leave the room was very smart on your part and a sign that you are going to be okay.
When I had my son a good friend who had two children told me "You can think about it as much as you like. But you must never do it."
The first time I was left alone with my son he started crying and although I did not though of shaking him I started thinking about people who do. I could understand the feeling of doing it and how some people follow through it because they don't have the mental tools to deal with it.
I can understand how it happens, not defending it, but I’ve been on the brink.
Just a piece of information on the subject for consideration: Research by biomechanical engineers has shown that you can't shake a baby with so much force that you cause internal head injuries but leave no external marks, bruises or injuries to the neck or spine. So, if there are bruises etc, then the baby likely died from shaken baby syndrome, if there are NOT bruises etc, and no history of abuse from the parents, then the baby very likely died from other causes, like a severe seizure. Problem is... there are dozens of cases where parents were charged with killing their child, but then were later acquitted due to questionable autopsies and testimony. Imagine the trauma of losing your child due to a seizure and then being charged with murder on top of that.
I love that this person has admitted to feeling this way, it is very real and very scary. I had a similar feeling about depression after birth and how could a mother EVER cause harm or kill herself when she has a baby dependent on her. After experiencing full on post natal depression, I totally understand.
I suffered from severe postpartum depression and had to be hospitalized. After a horrible high risk pregnancy, nearly losing my son from complications several times, nearly dying from hypovolemic shock and seizures during delivery, my son being admitted to the hospital twice within his first 10 days then coming home with home health care for two more weeks, after 3 surgeries to stop bleeding plus 2 lithotripsies for a few kidney stones from 7-12mm in size over the first 3 months, from my son having bad colic and sleeping very little and screaming very much, after finally having a hysterectomy and going into "instant menopause" I was not holding up too good at all. I became scared of everything, the dark, bedtime, my skills as a mother, my fluctuating moods, my son, and myself most of all. If you have "baby blues" please seek psychiatric help. I am so thankful I did. I wouldn't be here today if I hadn't and I never would have known the miracle that is my almost 18 year old baby boy!
Been there, almost did that, understand where it comes from completely! It is terrifying what the brain can do when you're sleep-deprived (my main reason for feelings of madness back when).
I understand how it can happen, too. If you'll notice, a large majority of the time this happens, it's usually a "boyfriend" or "friend" of the mom's and happens while she is at work/gone. It makes complete sense that someone who has little to know experience with a baby would want to shake them as they are probably about to go nuts over a screaming baby and have no idea what else to do. Thank God rationality kicks in for most of us. It's terrible we don't have affordable childcare everywhere. I'm not sure I could afford it these days and I have a great job.
My older son, as a baby, for the first six months, would only sleep an hour or two at the most. I spent long hours pacing back and forth with him in my arms to put him to sleep. I found, that if I held him close to me, not only could I not shake him in that position, but it calmed both of us down, having that contact. But I totally understand how hard it is. I thought I was losing my mind. I finally complained to my Dad (father of five), asking if this crying is normal. He laughed and said "Yes. Babies have been known to cry on occasion."
Until you're faced with a screaming baby that won't stop crying you just don't know how you'll react.
I also had this thought when I was extremely tired with sleep deprivation. I held my son tight, and just cried, thinking of how easily awful things like that happen
Grown ups need "time outs" too.... IE a chance to wind down before acting on frustration
Agreed I did the same with my daughter, I had fed, cuddled, burped, changed, sung did everything but she continued to cry, she wasn't sick or ill just wouldn't stop. I picked her up took her out of my bedroom where she was originally sleeping and put her in the made up cot, walked out shut the door went down stairs had a coffee and walked down the bottom of the garden for half an hour, because the temptation was horrendous, I fully understand how parents can shake their child sad I know.
People thought that "shaking" the baby was less than hitting/slapping. Unfortunately it is far worse!
Mine was screaming one night and I remembered they said just put them in the crib and walk away. I was so sleep deprived. I thought we will both be better if he's in there screaming his head off and I get some sleep. I closed his door, my door, put ear plugs in, and put a pillow over my head. I could still hear him. In 3 minutes he was asleep. That baby just needed me to leave him alone! But he would've been fine if I slept while he screamed. He was fed, changed, in comfy clothes etc. etc. Better than shaking the baby.
This is exactly why this needs to be talked about. If we are aware that the urge can happen to anyone then we can be more prepared for the warning signs and stop. If we lie about it or refuse to discuss it, people won't know they could be in that situation and might not process it enough to stop in time
I too understand why but when push comes to shove you remove yourself from the situation, my first daughter was stubborn as hell, & in my zombie like sleep deprived state when she started screaming non stop for hours every day ( Dr diagnose colic) I had to put her in a safe place ( cot) & go outside, I would go a couple houses down the road, I could still see my front door but couldn’t hear the screaming, I’d have a cigarette, coffee, compose myself then go back. I didn’t have any family of friends I was alone. One day she had gone to sleep while I was outside, I figured out that she didn’t have Colic, she was just over stimulated & over tired . A few days of letting her bellow a bit she started going down for a nap without a fuss. Sanity Saved.
My daughter would hold my granddaughter up and look at her deeply when she would cry, which seemed to be constantly, if she didn't feel bad she would lay the baby down gently in her crib and walk away. She was terrified she was going to hurt her. My granddaughter is now 17 and a very difficult child.
Put the baby in their car seat on top of the dryer and stay with them for safety. It works as well as a car ride. I don't know why more people don't know about this. It works!
My daughter became very sleep deprived with her first baby and couldn't cope. I'm always grateful she came over and left baby with me, had a few days to herself and picked him up when she was ready. I have repeatedly told my children I will be there if they needed a break and I am happy to be taken up on the offer.
Parents don't have the f*****g support they need to deal with babies. Parental leave is ESSENTIAL. People are falling apart because they can't maintain a job and a newborn. It's f*****g cruel.
Also: "colic". It's not really a disease per se. It is usually indigestion gas or worse, stomach acid. Ask the doctor for baby-dose omeprazole.
if you find yourself in this situation you MUST get earmuffs and you MUST take turns with your partner and you MUST stop with the breastmilk nazi obsession, or at least give your partner bottles to feed the baby. do NOT try do it all alone, you will end up abusing the child because of sleep deprivation. it is hell. Make sure you get at least 6 hours every night. Get people to sleep shifts.
Everyone who wants to become a parent should take parenting classes and go to psychologist
Thats one reason I dont want Kids. I love sleeping And I do crazy s**t when even one day sleepless
THIS!!! The shaming has got to stop!! You never know what can happen to you when you are sleep deprived. My mom died when my daughter was 8 months old. I was so overwhelmed with grief that I left the baby in the car. Not for very long, but long enough to really freak out and hate myself for it :( I was one of those people that before thought you had to be a terrible person that didn't deserve kids to forget your baby. She's almost 15 now and I still shudder at the thought.
I will never have kids. There's a host of reasons but this is one of them. I nearly lost my temper on my dog once, I don't even remember why but the look she gave me snapped me out of it and I couldn't understand what I had nearly done. I never touched her but I've not gotten over it, I'll never forgive myself for what I could have done, she's a good dog who's recognized that mommy has bad days and what she needs to do. I don't have patience on most days, my mental health is a long term construction site. If I added sleep deprivation to it of I had a child, I don't trust myself or my brain to have a moment of clarity before it's too late.
I've never had a child and don't really plan to, but I think I totally understand the "instinct" to shake a baby. It has nothing to do with wanting to harm the baby. But it's the same as when you bang on an electronic device when it's malfunctioning. It is born out of frustration. I truly feel sorry for anyone who didn't realize shaking the baby would cause injury and/or death to their child.
My daughter had colic. The doctor told me to check everything, that she was fed, clean, warm etc. then he said put her to bed and go in another room where you just hear her. He explained it was safer than losing control. At that time I didn’t understand but after some slepless nights and hours of crying I understood.
This is why I refuse to have kids. I have a very dangerous temper. It's a slow burner. If I get angry straight away then nothing much happens. I may shout a bit and that's all, but if I am forced to put up with a situation and I do nothing about it straight away, the anger just builds and builds until I snap. The worst thing that happened was when I was in school. A girl was just taking pleasure in doing what she could do to annoy me. This was just laughing constantly in my face or making stupid noises or pinching me. The more I asked her to stop the worse she got. Then I snapped. I still don't know what happened. It was like I blacked out. All I know was that one minute she was laughing in my face and the next I had her pinned to the wall by her throat. I was actually strangling her. I came to to the sound of the other girls in the class telling me to let her go. I said "what happened", and was informed that I pulled her out of her chair, threw the chair to the opposite end of the classroom and just grabbed her and picked her up and pinned her to the wall. It terrified me. I was turning into my Dad. His temper was exactly like that. He got so angry with me one time he picked me up threw me down the hall and punched me so hard I blacked out all because I had an argument with my mother. I immediately apologised to the girl and I have never done anything like that since. I realised that day what I am capable of and made sure not to let my temper get the better of me. But I just know that if I was in the position that this lady was in something bad would happen. I couldn't put a child in danger like that. In a I am glad I realised what my temper was capable of . There is no excuse for my violent reaction to that girl and I am glad she was alright. I am still sorry for it after 30 years but if I had done that to a child the kid would be dead and I would be rightfully in jail.
When I was fairly youngish I think 21 22 my sister in law and her husband left me with 5 yes 5 young children. Without telling me for a week whilst they went on holiday!!!! No phone in house or mobiles the youngest was 6months and he was teething the others went up 2 years each I had absolutely no experience at all and I was totally by myself. The baby would scream and scream. I didn't know he was teething. Not that I would have known what to do. I became very very close to shaking him I was crying too saying please stop. I eventually put him in his cot and went into another room to calm myself down. I only left him for 5 minutes. He was safe but I understood then how some people can be in such a bad way
What does shaking your baby do? Is it like because they don't have much protection on their head when you shake them it gives them a concussion or what?
It can cause brain damage and even death. The brain hits the skull at force causing damage.
Load More Replies... I remember that exact feeling. Like, you don't want to hurt the baby, but some weird impulse makes you think that it'll work.
There's an old expression, to "shake some sense into you." It's what people did when someone was hysterical, out of control, or just acting a little crazy - you'd shake them to try and stop them. It seems almost reasonable when you think about it. It's not dangerous for an adult, but when you have a child that's out of control, trying everything to get them to stop crying, stop screaming, then finally out of frustration resorting to shaking them - and they do stop. It's quiet, finally, and you can relax. But they've been hurt. It's such a dangerous place to get. This can happen to anyone, it's not bad people, it's people at the end of their rope. Just try and remember that. Don't get to the end of the rope. Sit down, calm down, take steps away. And the noise, yes, it's awful, but they don't understand, and they just scream. Count to a hundred if you need to - take a breath, drink some water. Tackle the problem with a clear head.
It took me awhile to understand this (language barrier), but like... I'm autistic (sensorial sensitivity and all), I feel that with adults who won't shut up. One of the reasons I quit high school was cause I felt like I'd hurt someone for them to stop talking. Currently have a very loud neighborhood who's let me in the verge of tears from the unstoppable noise. To me this is a very normal feeling.
Thank you for sharing, I know it's hard to admit but most of us can relate to a certain degree
I get this. I just had a baby in January and that first week to two weeks is awful and you can get really depressed. I would never do something like this to my little dude, but I understand why people might do it
My god. This happened to me with my first born. She wouldn't stop crying while carrying here, she was just a few months old and to my frustration I shook her hard and I realized what I just did right after and I felt so sorry and so bad. I had no idea whatsoever of post partum or anything that's brought about by just giving birth. Until this day I regret what happened.
This is like like understanding pedophilia. what the actual hell? No, just no. I've had 3 kids. Post partem depression, cea sections, autism, screaming for days with no help in pain.... the worst of the worst that kids could offer on the very brink of sanity.... and never once ever had some 'instinct' to shake a goddamned baby. Thats horrifying. Would you shake a puppy who didn't stop barking? What the actual hell? No, just no.
I’m sure you’ve heard someone say before that “people can’t change”. While this may have been uttered by a bitter, pessimistic individual, it’s actually a pretty common belief to hold. Whether it’s in reference to someone who cheated on their partner, someone struggling with addiction or a student who just won’t do their homework, feeling this way about another person isn’t likely to encourage them to change their habits.
But this list is a prime example that people can change. I think the issue is less about whether or not people can and more about whether or not they want to. People can certainly enact change within themselves, but we aren’t often successful in trying to alter anyone else. Mark Manson, author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, addresses this in a piece on his website saying, “For a person to truly change, they must feel that the change is theirs, that they chose it, they control it. Otherwise, it loses all its effect.”
Assisted Suicide. I was against it, but after seeing my uncle suffer with extreme Rheumatoid Arthritis for a few years before eventually dying from it, I’m all for it now. If we put down our pets when they’re suffering, why can’t we do the same to our humans with their written consent?
A human life riddled with pain and agony is not a life anymore. Some people get so in their own feelings that they forget their loved ones are essentially suffering. "How can I play God and decide who gets to live and who gets to die?" What about basic compassion? Assisted suicide is cherishing human life, it's giving the opportunity to the suffering people to die with dignity.
In the case of wanting someone else in our lives to change, we often have to sit back and fight the impulse to impose our own opinions. It can be painful, but as Mark notes, “The best attempts at helping someone often backfire. You can’t make someone be confident or respect themselves or take responsibility—because the means you use to do this destroys confidence, respect, and responsibility.”
So what does he recommend to gently guide loved ones towards better choices while maintaining our relationships? First, he notes that leading by example can be an effective tactic. If you think your partner is drinking too much and it’s beginning to negatively impact their life or health, you can set an example by inviting them to stay in with you more often or opting for nonalcoholic drinks in their company. It might not cause them to reconsider their own choices, but it does present them with an option they might have previously not even considered.
Universal healthcare. When I actually learned more about healthcare systems in other countries and then compared it to my own (I live in America) it really showed me just how far behind we are. For years I staunchly thought it was a horrible idea, but now I’m pissed everyday cause the US doesn’t have it.
I really don't understand how people think universal healthcare is a bad idea, it exists in all EU countries plus the UK, and people aren't weighed down with medical debt.
Abortion. Grew up Christian (not anymore). I started shifting more left but didn’t know if I could call myself pro-choice. So I researched it. 70%+ of abortions are done by women who live below the poverty line. 60% of those (45% of all) are done by women who also already have a child.
So its a mother who already struggles to feed her child making an impossible choice. Maybe instead of telling her what to do, we can figure out how to provide her basic needs and healthcare and educate her so she can get out of poverty.
Even if you eliminate the poverty no one should be allowed to force you to keep a lump of developing cells in your body. One which will change your body and life forever, and you might potentially not even survive it. Especially if it was conceived after rape, or if it generates a risk to the person carrying it.
Next, Mark recommends providing them with better questions, rather than answers. Avoid explicitly sharing your own opinions, and ask the other person questions that allow them to reflect on their actions. Mark provides the example of rather than telling someone they need to request a raise, you could ask them, “Do you believe you’re fairly paid?” They won’t feel judged, and it’s empowering for them to come to their own conclusions. Whether they agree with you or not, they’re at least considering the topic you raised.
Lastly, Mark notes how important it is to provide help unconditionally. Whether you think you know what’s best for them or not, resist the urge to tell them exactly what to do. Make yourself available, so they can take you up on the offer if they want to. Lots of people don’t want to hear advice, but they may relate to a personal story you share of a similar situation. And you’re not forcing them to do anything, especially change; you’re just opening up their mind.
Homosexuality. I “knew” that the Bible said it was wrong (fewer times than it said divorce was wrong). In college I actually met a lesbian for the first time. I had known them for months before I found it out though, so my brain was confused.
“But they’re normal! But they’re gay! So does that change anything? How does that affect me? Wait . . . That doesn’t affect me? So then what is the issue?”
I’ve never gone back to that stance.
Vaccines. My mom has always been an anti vaxxer, so I grew up with all the propaganda. Once i moved out and had to get all my vaccines for my job, I *did my own research* and learned the truth.
When it comes to what we change our minds on, it can be anything and everything. Maybe when you were growing up you hated brussels sprouts because of the way your parents prepared them, but after trying them roasted in the oven and drizzled with a bit of balsamic glaze, they became one of your favorite vegetables. Politics are certainly a common topic that people’s opinions ebb and flow on. Perhaps as a teenager you felt one way because that’s what your parents told you was right. Then when you went to college you joined some activist groups, and your political ideology did a 180. According to the Pew Research Center, even social media can play a role in affecting our political beliefs. In 2018, 14% of Americans say something they saw on social media caused them to alter their opinion on a political or social issue.
Jehovahs witnesses. I grew up as one and when I finally started doing research outside of their publications I couldn’t believe what I saw, and I left.
EDIT: I was disfellowshipped because I didn’t have the balls to disassociate myself. There were a lot of horrible things that happened to me in the religion in 2017-2019, so I felt my only way out was suicide. I failed my attempt in January of 2020, and was disfellowshipped in August of 2020, about four months after I got out of rehab. I lost my home, my job, my family, and my friends. Pretty much my entire life foundation. But I’ve built a support system from scratch and now I have friends who love me for me, and not just based on religion.
It’s sad but not many people get to start a brand new life in their 20’s so I’m grateful in many ways as well as grieving those I lost.
ANOTHER EDIT: Thank you for all of the love and the awards! It’s so heart warming to see so many people going through the same experiences. We are never alone and I’m sorry so many of you have been effected by this too.
FINAL EDIT: If you are a Jehovah’s Witness, I really don’t need you commenting on this to tell me I’m wrong and you’re not in a cult. What I’ve been through speaks for itself. So please let me be.
I would be dead if I was a Jehovah witness coz I needed a blood transfusion. How anyone could choose a deity that we don't know actually exists, over saving the life of your own child/partner etc. F**k that s**t.
Climate Change. Looking at the evidence it's clearly a hoax.
Just kidding, I was a firm denier until I had to do an assignment proving or disproving it in highschool. Realised I couldn't find any decent source to back up my claim. Basically changed my mind on the spot
Helium balloons; helium is a finite resource of immense scientific value and we use it for party decorations
Well, today I learned something ! I thought it was produced chemically, or by some sort of extraction process from other stuff. Turns out it's a natural gaz, and yes, we're slowly depleting the world reserves.
Certain groups were more impressionable, however. Men between the ages of 18-29, for example, were the most likely to be affected by what they read online, with 29% of them reporting that a social media post changed their views on an issue. The people who note that social media affects their beliefs also credit those sites for inspiring them to become more socially active. 67% of them said that social media is important to them for “finding others who share views about important topics” and 63% of them say social media is important for “getting involved with political or social issues”. 56% of them also noted that social media is important to them personally for “giving them a venue to express their political opinions”.
Horse racing. I come from an area that takes great pride in it. I've recently learned more about it and feel that it is animal abuse. They are shot up with steroids and other drugs and die more often than you would even think.
Working Hard.
More specifically, working hard in a corporate environment. I like to work hard for things that I own and maintain, my home, my family, my body, my hobbies. But I've worked for almost 20 years for big tech companies. I've started at entry level jobs and worked up to middle management. Support jobs. Sales jobs. I've made 6 figures.
What I've noticed is that they want to pay you less and keep training and experience as a reward. That is to say, you are not working for a paycheck. You are working towards the next thing. But they convince everyone to work hard in an entry level position, working unpaid overtime and you might be rewarded with a higher job. Statistically, you will not be promoted. There are 30 people on your team who all have that same goal and you can't all be supervisor or manager.
Now, I just work for my paycheck. If you would like me to work harder, you can pay me more. I'm not going to go above and beyond for 2 years just to get passed over again.
I didn't think orthopedic shoes were for me, but I stand corrected.
By 2020, 23% of Americans on social media said that “they have changed their views about a political or social issue because of something they saw on social media in the past year”. That alone (the jump from 14% to 23% over the course of 2 years) is a perfect indication of how people’s opinions change over time. People between the ages of 18-29 were still the most impressionable in 2020, with 34% of them reporting that their views had shifted from social media. The topics that people were most likely to change their minds about were the Black Lives Matter Movement, police brutality/need for police reform, political parties/ideologies/politicians, and race relations in general. One 64 year old woman stated, “Reading articles on the BLM movement has opened my eyes to the degree of systemic racism in this country and the world.” While another respondent, a 50 year old man said, “I used to support BLM, but now I see them as violent domestic terrorists not interested in addressing the real problems within the Black community. BLM is about a communist revolution not about helping the Black community…”
Mormons.
My ex-wife’s sister married one.
Before they met, my opinion of Mormons was “oh they’re basically just Christian’s with a couple wacky beliefs. They have multiple wives! How kooky yet ultimately harmless.”
The more of his family & community I met and interacted with, the more clear it became that Mormonism is a cult that preys on weak people like my ex-SIL. She converted within three months. His temple wouldn’t allow her own mother or father inside during the wedding. They had to sit outside in the sun, alone, then pay for a separate “ring ceremony” they were allowed to attend.
Learning more about a different culture or religion usually makes me more accepting, but maaaan f**k Mormons.
I was raised a Mormon. The oppressiveness is very subtle and creates sort of a Stockholm Syndrome among true believers. One of my biggest objections with them is their one-size-fits-all view of life that they claim is God's Plan. Conform conform conform...
Feminism. I thought it excluded the inequalities men face. I learned that if the problem women face is fixed it takes care of the ones men do as a bonus.
Homelessness. I used to have no patience or or empathy thinking that if they really wanted to change their circumstances they could find the resources. My mind changed when I began working with special education children and realized most of these people probably have specific learning disabilities that our school system/their families failed to identify or help them with. I also realize how privileged I grew up (my dad was a store manager and my mom a teacher so nothing too special but still we had everything we needed and good relationships with each other) and how much worse some people grew up with and how easily people can get trapped in bad circumstances.
I used to think most homeless people were criminals, druggies or alcoholics but after watching quite a few docos and lots of research I discovered that most homelessness is caused by unfortunate circumstances. Things like mental illness (main cause), disability, aged out of the foster system, family abuse, job loss which cause housing loss, medical debt (US) and much more. A lot of homeless turn to drugs and alcohol once they are on the street. It's a way tonumb their reality, as well as pass the time. There is not enough support for homeless people and what services there are, there scattered all over the place or just not enough to go around. Homelessness is FAR more complicated than you actually think.
While we’re certainly all capable of changing our minds, it can be challenging to get there. We tend to be stubborn, so Dr. Maria Cohut of Medical News Today took a look at why exactly that is. She references a study that investigated “what, exactly, happens in the brain that makes people so unlikely to change their minds”, and notes that facts are often not enough to alter people’s opinions. “For instance,” the researchers of the study wrote, “over the last decade climate scientists have expressed greater confidence that climate change is man-made. Yet, the percentage of the population that believes this notion to be true has dropped over the same period of time.”
All lives matter VS Black Lives Matter. I’m not racist, and I thought saying that “all lives matter” was better than BLM because it included everyone, meaning that everyone is important. Thankful I have a wife who is smarter than me and helped me to realized that BLM is important because of the attention that it shows/brings to the group of people who are being treated unfairly. That’s the nice thing about being open minded is you can change and not feel bad about it.
Cats! I never grew up around cats, thought they were mean. Now I date a girl who has a cat and I have a cat of my own. I love them so much.
I hated cats for years, didn't help that my dad was anti cats, I am allergic to cats and the first time I pet a cat the bugger scratched me. Anyway over the years my mind has changed, I don't hate cats anymore (I hate a lot of cat owners instead lol) If I wasn't allergic I would even consider having one as a pet.
That case where McDonald's had to pay a bunch of money to a woman who spilled hot coffee on herself.
According to the researchers, confirmation bias is a strong force. This was tested through an experiment where participants were randomly paired off with partners and shown images of real estate listings. The participants were then asked to evaluate what they would expect the asking price of each property to be, either more or less than an amount set by investors. Each participant then decided how much they would be willing to invest. Next they were asked to take functional MRI scans facing their partners, with a glass screen dividing them. Each participant could see on the glass screen images of the properties, the asking price estimates and how much they said they would be willing to invest. Then, the participants were shown their partners’ responses.
Turns out girls don't have cooties. It's actually pretty great to spend time with one. You don't even have to pick on them to get their attention... Who knew!
Being sober, took a eightish year landslide to one of the darkest places I've been in my life and not once in those eight years you could of talked me into putting down the bottle of whiskey that was glued to my hand. Been sober coming up on five years now and I couldn't think of being anything other than sober. I won't sit here and say it's not easy, it is honestly one of the hardest things I have to deal with on a consistent basis. But the rewards are priceless.
Getting therapy. My upbringing is within an asian household so when it comes to dealing with emotions, we tend to shove that into jar and move on.
I used to think that receiving therapy is for the mentally ill, weak etc. I don't have "problems" therefore I don't need therapy. But after recent events in 2021 with certain people I tried therapy and after a few sessions it just revealed some baggage I wasn't even aware of.
Honestly I wish I started earlier when I was in my 20s. I would be more emotionally prepared, and would probably have had healthier relationships with women if I had dealt with the trauma growing up and from my first relationship that devastated me.
We have a friend from Shanghai and felt the same about therapy as that's how he was brought up. That was until he ended up in a mental health facility. Now he is much more understanding when it comes to mental health and the necessary support.
The researchers found that, when their partners agreed with their evaluation of the property value, participants would be more willing to invest more into those houses, especially if their partners had said they would invest larger amounts. Yet when the partnered participants disagreed about the property value, their opinions would fail to influence each other’s final decision as to how much they would be willing to invest in that house. The conclusion researchers came to, after studying the brain activity revealed by the MRI scans, is that our “brains fail to encode opposing views”. We ignore beliefs that contradict our own and cling to ideas that strengthen ours.
Pineapple on pizza is absolutely delicious as f**k. and the only reason I ever thought it was bad was beause I was bandwagonning on the hate just like everyone else is. It's hard to appreciate a piece of food if you literally go into it with the intent of hating it.
For me, it was exactly the opposite. I thought it'd be okay until I tried and immediately hated it. However, I don't hate on others what they eat, it's just my personal decision.
Legalization of marijuana. Used to be incredibly anti drug and pro keeping it illegal. Now I fully support decriminalization at the very least (still extremely anti drug personally, but came to my senses regarding real life)
Same. We were inundated with anti drug propaganda as kids, and up until my late teens I thought you tried weed once and next day you were a junkie (drugs were also non existent in the area where i grew up, so I didn't know anyone who had tried it) Then I read some stuff, and met some people, and though I've never used drugs myself I'm definitely pro legalization and regulation. That's the logical route, based on the science.
Mother Teresa, my family spoke highly of her when I was a kid, she received a number of honours from Indian government, won the Nobel Peace Prize and the church made her a saint, I thought she was a good person until a friend told me the truth about her and showed me some articles.
Although opinions can be difficult to alter in brief moments, according to Christopher Soto at NPR, our personalities naturally change throughout our entire lives. Soto first explained that our personalities are organized into the “Big Five” trait dimensions: extraversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, negative emotionality, and open-mindedness. According to various studies, most of us can become more agreeable, conscientious and emotionally resilient as we get older. Soto notes that these shifts typically happen over decades and are hard to pinpoint to specific causes, but they can be beneficial to our lives. Further developing these specific traits can even lead to happier, longer lasting marriages, according to a study in Sage Journals. This slow personality evolution can also explain how our beliefs can shift over time as well.
Roundabouts. Based on all the complaints, I assumed they were confusing and unnecessary. When my city put in a bunch, I realized that I no longer had to wait 3 minutes at all of the punishment lights. Love roundabouts now.
...Of course that didn't stop the older population of the city from trying to have them removed. One guy even ran for city council on the platform that he would immediately put the stop lights back in. Change is hard, I guess.
Nuclear Power. I used to be anti-nuke, based solely on the potential worst-outcome of a catastrophic failure. While in college I saw a presentation on the various short-term and long-term negativities of all the different power generation methods and nuclear is actually one of the safest, even including the 3 major incidents of Chernobyl, 3-Mile Island, and Fukushima. Additionally, coal-burning power is so unfathomably bad for everyone involved in every stage from mining the coal to living anywhere close to the plant that it is just orders of magnitude worse than anything else. Nuclear has the best balance of reliability, base-load, safety, and ROI of any method known for generating power.
Ok, talking about safety is alright. What about the storage of waste? Deconstruction of old reactors (storing that waste too) I would go this way: if we stop using it, we stop developing new methods , netter procedurs and so on. So not a complete no, but still, it’s not forever a go to way of producing electricity.
People going on morning runs. I kept reading stuff about how it helps with anxiety and depression. I didn't really understand because one, who tf has the energy to get up before the sun rises to RUN??? and two, what if ppl look at me weird etc etc... One day after a major afternoon breakdown which lead to deep sleep i woke up at 4am. Felt sick of looking at my room, changed into leggings and a hoodie, left the house without anyone knowing (i left a note) and started walking. Eventually, i started running. I felt my brain shut up for those few hours i spent running, i reached the next city and stopped to sit down at this random park. It just,, it felt so nice. I ran all the way over to the next city with nothing but my phone, earphones, and a bottle of water. The only way for me to get back home is to run back or call my dad to pick me up. I ran back. When I got home i felt so much better. Started going out to run once a week since then, found a usual spot for people who run, met nice people. Happiest I've ever been. Those sane and healthy f*****s were right.
Started walking (running hurts) for at least an hour every morning and I can confirm it is a great feeling
While humans have a tendency to be stubborn and hold fast to our opinions, it’s refreshing to read this list of examples that we are capable of being open-minded. Especially because we live in a world that is so unpredictable and constantly changing, we should be allowed to do the same as well. Be sure to upvote the responses that gave you reason to pause and think, then let us know in the comments something you’ve changed your mind about!
College education. I always thought it would benefit everyone to get one. These days, the benefits don’t _always_ outweigh the debts and many people in trades make very good money.
I would recommend to learn a trade. Electrician, carpenter, plumber... are all much more useful than most managers.
Empathy. I used to always want to give people the benefit of the doubt if it meant they were learning or working on themselves, because I know I’d want the same. Turns out some people will take your kindness and run with it, and you need to cut yourself off from people that do or you’re going to find yourself mentally or emotionally drained. Can’t pour from an empty cup and all that.
Note: this post originally had 37 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
Saying the pledge of allegiance every day in school. We all grew up thinking it was normal. Until we had twitter and TikTok and could hear from people in other countries. This is not normal! No one else does this?!? except for militaristic, dictatorship style countries. It's an intentional method of training younger generations to do whatever their government asks because "patriotism" and "national pride". It's creepy and it's weird. And no country should ever get your blind allegiance.
Same with the national anthem at sports games it's done so often that it's not special anymore and somehow it became super political.
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Yup people need to have their own epiphanies. More often than not, no matter how logical and convincing your points are, most will simply brush them off as a "difference of opinion". Until that lightbulb moment.
And here we are at today's blocked-for-Android post. Always good to have Bored Panda remind us all how much they dislike visitors who use Android.
I have android, what is blocked? I read the whole article and I can see comments. Only thing 'blocked' are comments that are hidden due to many downvotes.
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I noted with interest that the majority of these are not about someone having researched a topic, but rather having encountered it in their own lives. It's hard to change your mind, especially hard to lose a prejudice, without personal influence of somebody close to the topic / belonging to the group.
When my son was just six weeks old, I went into his room to check on him before going to bed myself. He wasn't breathing, so I started screaming for my husband, and at the same time, picked up Son and tilted him head to toe, over and over, until he started breathing again. Husband wanted to shake him, but I knew not to do that, and the tilting worked safely and well. Scared the tar out of me that my newborn baby was so close to death. Husband didn't want him sleeping in our tiny bedroom (1976, tiny trailer house), so I slept in Baby's room for a few months until I "got it" that it was a one-off incident. He didn't suffer any kind of damage, thankfully, although he was killed in an accident just days before Thanksgiving when he was 31 (16 years ago). Still, I saved his life that night, and got to have him for nearly 32 years, so I would've done it again, knowing I wasn't 'shaking' him, just tilting him to get him breathing again.
GMOs. As a teenager I really hated GMOs, after starting to study food sciences in college I actually got educated on the different methods and reasons. Changed my stance a lot. There's still some modifications I find unnessecary or bad, but I'm far from thinking all are bad.
Can I just say that we as people have too much judgement and not enough emphathy? We look at things from the outside and just because we can't understand it, we judge it as wrong instead of not FOR me. Hindsight is 20/20 but recognizing that there are things beyond you and your understanding would greatly reduce the hate and anger people project over an opinion that can change by experiencing it. So, instead, we could just have a little bit of selflessness (or a whole lotta "mind your own business") and say "to each their own".
To this I would add Marvin Heemeyer, the "killdozer" guy. often portrayed as some sort of underdog antihero who got back at The Man without killing anybody, he was actually a bitter whackadoodle who had every intention of killing his perceived enemies. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marvin_Heemeyer
Saying the pledge of allegiance every day in school. We all grew up thinking it was normal. Until we had twitter and TikTok and could hear from people in other countries. This is not normal! No one else does this?!? except for militaristic, dictatorship style countries. It's an intentional method of training younger generations to do whatever their government asks because "patriotism" and "national pride". It's creepy and it's weird. And no country should ever get your blind allegiance.
Same with the national anthem at sports games it's done so often that it's not special anymore and somehow it became super political.
Load More Replies... Yup people need to have their own epiphanies. More often than not, no matter how logical and convincing your points are, most will simply brush them off as a "difference of opinion". Until that lightbulb moment.
And here we are at today's blocked-for-Android post. Always good to have Bored Panda remind us all how much they dislike visitors who use Android.
I have android, what is blocked? I read the whole article and I can see comments. Only thing 'blocked' are comments that are hidden due to many downvotes.
Load More Replies... I noted with interest that the majority of these are not about someone having researched a topic, but rather having encountered it in their own lives. It's hard to change your mind, especially hard to lose a prejudice, without personal influence of somebody close to the topic / belonging to the group.
When my son was just six weeks old, I went into his room to check on him before going to bed myself. He wasn't breathing, so I started screaming for my husband, and at the same time, picked up Son and tilted him head to toe, over and over, until he started breathing again. Husband wanted to shake him, but I knew not to do that, and the tilting worked safely and well. Scared the tar out of me that my newborn baby was so close to death. Husband didn't want him sleeping in our tiny bedroom (1976, tiny trailer house), so I slept in Baby's room for a few months until I "got it" that it was a one-off incident. He didn't suffer any kind of damage, thankfully, although he was killed in an accident just days before Thanksgiving when he was 31 (16 years ago). Still, I saved his life that night, and got to have him for nearly 32 years, so I would've done it again, knowing I wasn't 'shaking' him, just tilting him to get him breathing again.
GMOs. As a teenager I really hated GMOs, after starting to study food sciences in college I actually got educated on the different methods and reasons. Changed my stance a lot. There's still some modifications I find unnessecary or bad, but I'm far from thinking all are bad.
Can I just say that we as people have too much judgement and not enough emphathy? We look at things from the outside and just because we can't understand it, we judge it as wrong instead of not FOR me. Hindsight is 20/20 but recognizing that there are things beyond you and your understanding would greatly reduce the hate and anger people project over an opinion that can change by experiencing it. So, instead, we could just have a little bit of selflessness (or a whole lotta "mind your own business") and say "to each their own".
To this I would add Marvin Heemeyer, the "killdozer" guy. often portrayed as some sort of underdog antihero who got back at The Man without killing anybody, he was actually a bitter whackadoodle who had every intention of killing his perceived enemies. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marvin_Heemeyer
