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Wedding planning is not for the faint-hearted. And although much of its burden goes directly to the newlyweds, a solid share of stress comes to the bridesmaid, aka a good or best friend or two, or ten, who have been there since the beginning of the romance.

But everything is more or less survivable unless the bride turns into a bridezilla. Watch out for the first signs—delusional and stubborn behavior, lack of patience, and sacrificing others for their personal gains. And who is better equipped to share what it’s like surviving a bridezilla wedding than the bridesmaids who’ve been to nuptial hell and back?

Let’s see what they had to say when one Redditor posed the inquiry “Bridesmaid of Reddit who was involved in a bridezilla wedding, what happened?” and it’s not gonna be pretty, let me tell you that.

#1

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless I had an ectopic pregnancy in which the baby attached to my fallopian tube, which then burst, and I almost bled to death. Well, my friend got engaged shortly after that pregnancy, and when she asked me to be her bridesmaid, she said that I would be 'required' to wait to try and have another baby until after her wedding..."
"Not because there would be a small child at the wedding, and not even because she didn't want me to be 'fat' at her wedding. But because if I lost another child, it would take the attention away from her engagement and wedding! I was so shocked that I declined and haven't spoken to her since

MommaBearJam , OSPAN ALI Report

#2

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless The father of the bride had a heart attack, and as he was being carried out on the stretcher, the sobbing bride yelled, 'How could you ruin my wedding like this?!'

remberzz , Christopher Campbell Report

If you've ever attended a wedding or had one of your own, you know how much work, sleepless nights, and anticipation there is under that beautiful, once-in-a-lifetime facade. But it's no secret that some weddings turn sour for various reasons; sometimes things go against the plan, other times it’s plain luck deciding to turn its back on you, and occasionally, it’s the toxic environment which makes both the preparation and the big day into something you’d rather forget.

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So in order to find out why wedding planning turns sour, what you should do if it does, and how to handle a bridezilla on the loose, Bored Panda reached out to Rhiann Janak Gouabeche, the CEO of Lucy Till French Wedding planners that cover some of the most beautiful places to say ‘I do’ out there, from Provence, the French Riviera, to the French Alps, and Lake Como.

#3

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless I couldn't attend my friend's last-minute destination wedding because I had to travel to visit my dad — who was dying of cancer — to handle hospice arrangements. She was pissed, and tried to guilt-trip me because I couldn't afford both plane flights. That was the end of our friendship

theuncannyvalleys , Mooferman Report

#4

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless My wife's best friend is a florist, and she gifted her services to her friend's wedding. Well, afterward, the bride and her mom got pissy at her because she didn't give them an additional gift. Let's conveniently forget the $1,000 in floral products she gifted to the wedding! It's a rift that has never been healed

Hard_at_it , Thomas William Report

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Marianne
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a more than generous gift! Like so often, they should not have mixed friends with business.

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Rhiann, who has planned over 50 weddings in the south of France, told us that if you’re feeling tremendous pressure when planning your wedding, you’re probably not alone.“Did you know that wedding planning is ranked one of the most stressful jobs in the world, just after soldiers and firefighters?” She continued: “While I've only ever put out one real fire at a wedding, I stomp out emotional fires all the time.”

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First off, in order to make sure things go according to the plan and you don’t bury yourself under so much stress you can no longer enjoy the moment, Rhiann suggests hiring a professional wedding planner. “It is the number one thing you can do to keep your wedding and stress levels in check. Professionals spend on average 250 hours planning each wedding. Unless you have the time to do this, finding the time is stressful enough without adding all the doubt surrounding wedding etiquette.”

#5

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless She wouldn't let our friend — who had breast cancer and was in chemotherapy — sit down after walking down the aisle

CasuConsuIto , bantersnaps Report

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Nea
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope the friend who had cancer stopped being friends with this selfish monster

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Cynthia Humphreys
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What I don't get is this...there were likely other guests who knew of the woman's health condition. Those that 'let' the bride refuse to allow that woman to be seated is just as bad as the bride. Shameful.

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Hermione
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah someone passing out down the aisle is much more interesting

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Chicago Dog Lover
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I had been the bridesmaid, and was feeling very charitable that day, I would have sat down anyway. If I had not been feeling charitable, I would purposely collapse!

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May
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand what happened here? Why was the woman with cancer walking down the isle? Why was she standing? In weddings where I live, only the priest stands for most of the ceremony - everyone only stands briefly.

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Valerie Smart
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i Would have unleashed on bride, told groom good luck with this one, took friend and walked the hell out. Why spare her feelings when she clearly had none for others.

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Kim Lorton
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She needs to go, as a friend she is unconscionable, and selfish.

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Cybele Spanjaard
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What! Why not? She should have been honoured her friend was a true friend to her to be there for her...how sad.

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Suzanne Haigh
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She should just have sat down and everyone should have made sure she did, does not say about her other "friends".

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SAF saf
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, this is on the groom also. At a certain point you need to speak up. This is pretty disgusting.

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Mickie Shea
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not to late. You just found out who she really is, Cruella.

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Azure Adams
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow! Hope she got something worse than cancer after her divorce which we all know was inevitable

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#6

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless Planner here. Bride invites ex boyfriend to wedding because “he’s just a really good friend”. During reception her husband of 2 hours goes to the bathroom, she plants a kiss on him. Notices I saw and promptly reminds me to mind my business. At the end of the night, catering informed me they hadn’t settled their bill. If they didn’t get payment that night there would be an additional fee charged. I run outside and let them know before they drive off. Two days later I get a call from groom who informs me the bride is extremely upset with my “unprofessionalism” and wants a refund. She wasn’t happy that I “made a scene” by running outside to tell them about the bill, in an effort to save them from additional charges. I asked him if he was aware of the scene she made when she kissed ex BF on the dance floor while he went to the bathroom. He hung up.

Imabigdiva , Mitchell Orr Report

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Having said that, Rhiann believes that planning your wedding can truly be a wonderful experience where you learn about what you want to share with your guests about your couple. “Do you love food? Focus on that. Are you big into music? Hire a great band. Love yellow? Be original with your color palette. No matter what, don't lose sight of the fact that weddings are parties where 2 people have fallen so much in love that they just have to celebrate it with their friends and family!”

#7

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless My best friend left me out of her bridal party because I was overweight and her mother thought that would limit bridesmaid dress choices and throw the wedding photos off

volcanicpale , Omar Lopez Report

#8

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless After the ceremony was over, the bride informed us that in order to save money, the wedding party wouldn't be served a meal along with the rest of the guests. She said, 'You already had the privilege of being in my wedding —what more can you ask for?

ligamentary , Alvin Mahmudov Report

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The professional wedding planner reminds everyone that “Love is at the core, and if you remember that and focus on what you love while letting a professional handle the nitty gritty, you won't ever become the dreaded B word!”

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Speaking of the dreaded B word, there are just too many bridezilla stories surfing around not to ask Rhiann about it. “A bridezilla is someone who loses her cool when it comes to wedding planning, usually snapping at friends, family, and suppliers when these people are only trying to help,” she explained.

#9

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless The final straw for me was when the bride demanded to see the toast I'd written...so she could edit it. She ended up rewriting it altogether, and I ended up skipping her wedding.

hotel_girl985 , HyggeLab Concept Report

#10

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless I lost some weight between the time I agreed to be a bridesmaid and the wedding. Well, the bride threw me out of the wedding party because she wanted to be the skinny one on the stage!

Reddituser , Jennifer Marquez Report

Moreover, a bridezilla should not be confused with a demanding bride since “it's a most important day, and it's entirely NORMAL to have particular and important desires.” Rhiann continued that “a bridezilla, though, is a DIFFICULT bride because of the way she expresses those desires and treats those involved in the wedding plans with hostility, belittlement, or lack of appreciation.”

#11

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless The bride was blonde, and all the bridesmaids were brunette except me, so the bride asked me to dye my hair brown for the wedding because she wanted to be the only blonde.

kmmurky , Marius Muresan Report

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Full of Giggles
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’d color my hair ombré blue or green. She’ll still be the only blonde.

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#12

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless My ex-best friend tried to make me and another bridesmaid walk down the uneven outdoor aisle WITHOUT OUR GLASSES, saying they would 'ruin the aesthetic' of her wedding! And she told us the morning of the wedding, so we didn't even have time to get get contacts! Her mom was able to calm her down by reassuring her that she was skinnier and more beautiful than both of us, so no one would be looking at us anyway.

Suitcaseofsparks , Jonathan Borba Report

The second after the bride comes the bridesmaid. “A bridesmaid is one of the most important roles you can be honored with in the life of a friendship,” Rhiann told us.

As a bridesmaid, “you should be excited, support the union, and let the bride know that! The Maid of Honor is the most important bridesmaid. It is her job to plan the bachelorette party and to make sure all the bridesmaids are getting the right clothes, shoes, earrings for each event so that the bride doesn't have to.”

#13

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless I've had colorful hair for years now. It's quite the investment-- I go to a salon to get it done, and buy high quality products. When my best friend asked me to be her MOH, my hair was neon pink. Three weeks before her wedding, she requested that I color my hair to a natural color. I was SHOCKED. She offered to give me $100 to get it done (lol). I had justttt gotten my hair done (a plum/red color, quite tame in comparison to what I've done in the past)

If I had just randomly went from brown to lime green out of no where I might understand her frustrations, but at this point I hadn't seen my natural color in like 3 years!

I never changed my hair, we got into a screaming match at her bachelorette party and she drunkenly revealed that her mom hated my hair and would not stop bitching about it. We cried and hugged in the club bathroom and all was well.

Her mom didn't speak to me at the wedding and I'm okay with that.

sweetvi0let , Omar Lopez Report

#14

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless My best friend just got kicked out of a wedding because she couldn't afford to spend the $1,500 to go to the bachelorette party. The bride told her to take out a credit card to pay for it!

awayfrommymind , Rachel Lees Report

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Marianne
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The amount of money American women are expected to invest in their friend's weddings is insane: expensive dresses, hair-do and make-up, bridal showers, bachelorette parties, presents ... In Germany, we do not traditionally have a "bridal party". We might have a bachelorette party, but bridal showers are an unknown thing. Also everyone can wear what they like and buy in their price range.

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All the bridesmaids have a lot of responsibilities coming at them on the big day. Rhiann says that “bridesmaids need to show up, be on time, and make the day and wedding events all about the bride.” Simultaneously, they shouldn’t forget that “It's not their time to shine, they are the supporting role to the leading lady, and should boost, never take away from the spotlight.”

#15

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless It was 10 degrees Fahrenheit in February, and the bride insisted on outdoor photos WITHOUT COATS because 'we can't hide the dresses!' Even the photographer told her no, and she pitched a fit! Years later, she still complains about how her bridesmaids ruined her wedding

Hexagogo , Andre Hunter Report

#16

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless My dad had the audacity to die 6 weeks before the wedding, and she couldn't understand why that superseded her wedding details for me. I met my husband at her wedding, haven't spoken to her since.

J-squire , Omar Lopez Report

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Verena Gitterle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She was not deserving your friendship, but you meeting your husband at the wedding makes up for that.

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Bored Panda also spoke to Roberta Torresan, a professional wedding planner and designer based in Rome, Italy who specializes in gorgeous luxury weddings. Roberta said that it’s no secret that “some brides-to-be tend to get very obsessed by the small details of their wedding, and sometimes they take it to the extreme. Perhaps it is because they really want to have everything under control but they cannot manage the planning process properly.”

When asked how to not turn your wedding into a stressful experience, Roberta said that it’s not easy since “no brides or grooms (99%) have ever planned a wedding before. So asking for help is ok, but sometimes this solution might be worse than the problem.”

#17

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless Not a bridemaid, but a witness to one.

The bride got walked out on by her entire bridle party, except her maid of honor. Of course it was because no one loved her, and everyone wanted to ruin her day, not because she ripped a bridemaids dress from the neck down, in an open area, because it was too white ... it was the dress the bride insisted on all the maids wearing.

BARDLover , Christiana Rivers Report

#18

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless She had her bachelorette party the same weekend as my birthday, but we weren't allowed to do anything for my birthday on the trip, not even mention it. Well, on my actual birthday, some of my friends got some balloons and a little cake from the hotel. They tried to keep it a secret, but Bridezilla came into the room, saw everything, went completely silent, then walked out, pissed

rational_adult , Erik Mclean Report

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Jozie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I understand she wanted it to be about her but she should at least be able to eat her little cake from the hotel in peace with her balloons.

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The wedding planner continued: “You may want to hire a professional planner, but be careful, are you really willing to let a planner take care of your own wedding? Sometimes I prefer to be honest and suggest that a bride plan her wedding by herself,” Roberta told us.

#19

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless When my friend was a bridesmaid, she received an astonishingly detailed itinerary of how to behave on the wedding day, with notes like "9:52am: Compliment the bride on how she looks on this, the most important day of her life". On the actual wedding day, the bride repeatedly got angry with my friend for not adhering to the itinerary. This was after several months of the bride expecting my friend to be available at a moment's notice to take care of any wedding chores. They haven't spoken since the wedding day.

ChestnutMoss , Meryl Spadaro Report

#20

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless Not a brides maid but one of the groomsmen. The groomsmen were forced to work through the entire post-wedding ceremony, cleaning up peoples shit and trying to make sure things go well. When we tried to hide and take a break, we got yelled at by the bride and her mother to keep working. Needless to say I no longer talk to them.

LordVeris , Alvin Mahmudov Report

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deanna woods
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good call. Why would you have the groomsmen working at the wedding?

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When it comes to being an excellent bridesmaid, Roberta said the responsibilities include not only standing with the bride all day long and helping her in various ways, but also giving a hand during “the planning process, especially when no planners have been hired.”

“My suggestion is to listen to the bride's requests and try to please her without questions. It's her wedding,” the luxury wedding planner concluded.

#21

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless She kicked someone out of the wedding party who couldn't make it bridesmaid dress shopping because she was sick and had to go to the hospital

SashWhitGrabby , Marcel Strauß Report

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#22

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless Friend asked me to be a bridesmaid in her shotgun wedding that was to take place in a little over a month. She has us order semi-expensive dresses and they HAD to be altered to a certain length. Shoes had to be ordered. Toenails had to be painted neutral color and fingernails had to be French manicure. We weren’t allowed to paint our own nails-we HAD to get them done at a salon. Hair HAD to be done professionally by her hairstylist. And we were not, under any circumstance, to have bikini tan lines visible. Mind you, this was right after summer. I lived in an area where beach attire was usually the only attire and everyone had visible tan lines.

I eventually had to tell her that I could not afford to have everything done professionally with such short notice. I would be happy to do my hair and makeup. My hair was so short I couldn’t do an updo. She told me her mom could pay and then I could pay her back. That was the final straw.

I sent an email to her telling her I could no longer be in her wedding. She was pregnant, about to get hitched, and now I was adding to her list of problems. I valued the friendship and told her such, but just couldn’t do what she was asking.

I hadn’t heard from her for YEARS. Until one day she sent me a message, asking for me to buy from her MLM campaign. FFS.

killrtofujalapenobiz , Dmitriy Nushtaev Report

#23

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless I didn’t make it to the wedding. I was best friends with the woman, literally we did everything together. She assembled her wedding party and didn’t invite me. She threw me my bachelorette, witnessed my marriage, etc. I found out later I wasn’t invited because I was overweight and her mother thought that would limit bridesmaid dress choices and throw the wedding photos ‘off’. At least I know, dodged a bullet.

volcanicpale , Ibrahim Boran Report

#24

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless Not a bridesmaid, wife was a cousin to the bride. This happened a few months ago. Bachlorette party a few days before wedding, my wife didn't go but her sister and other family went. A couple male strippers there, lots of alcohol. Suddenly bridesmaids realize the bride is missing. They find her in her hotel with one of the strippers...who happens to be black. She freaks and tells everyone she was raped. Cops come. Stripper arrested. Wedding canceled. Everyone feeling sorry. Detective on the case doesn't believe her story and bride finally comes clean. Her mom and my wife's mom still believe she was legit raped by the stripper.

thegauntlet , Odd Fellow Report

#25

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless My best friend got married and she was actually very calm throughout the whole planning process and on the wedding day. However, the day after the wedding she texted me and sarcastically said “thanks for the wedding present”. I was planning to get her a present with my next paycheck. However, I was in such shock she texted me that. Especially after I spent ~$800 (dress, alterations, shoes, nails, makeup, hair, hotel room, etc.) to be in her wedding. It felt like all she cared about was gifts.

smnth123 , Tetiana SHYSHKINA Report

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Helen Haley
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I refuse to attend or be in weddings. I've dropped countless thousands on weddings over the years. Because I never plan to marry, this will never be reciprocated and no one even bothers to get me a birthday card. I'm now against the gratuitous expectations of both weddings and baby showers.

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#26

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless She reached out after the wedding to ask me how to return my gift for store credit

ligamentary , Jorge César Report

#27

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless Picked $400 bridesmaid dresses. Destination bachelorette that cost over $1200. Insisted on a super expensive spot for the bridal shower. Registered at william Sonoma. I was a broke ass college student with limited funds. But managed to pay for all this crap and give a gift.

Bonus points: her husband forgot his entire [friggin] ux and didn't figure this out until a few hours before the ceremony.

A few minutes before the ceremony when she screamed at me for like the 500th time that day I snapped and told her either she cut her [mess] or I was getting in my car and going home.

She cut her [mess] . The rest of it went fine.

Notatumor1990 , Omar Lopez Report

#28

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless Bride insisted we (bridesmaids) make all the decorations but got pissed because they weren’t up to her high standard. All of this a month before the wedding because she procrastinated the whole thing. Wanted to plan the bridal shower herself cause she thought we were incompetent. During the bachelorette party we went to a decently fancy restaurant and bride was pissed because her little sister (bridesmaid who helped with nothing) “only ate simple foods so we should have just went to mcdonalds”. To this day she keeps saying how she wants to do the wedding over again because of how horrible everything went. There is so much more to this but I’m already border-line exposing myself (we are still currently friends) by saying all of this haha. It was not a good time and I myself don’t want to have a wedding after being a part in that disaster

missxdi , freestocks Report

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Anne Marieke Fransen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My niece had a beautiful wedding but an unhappy marriage. Please keep your focus on the important things in life

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#29

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless I had to wear very high heels that didn't fit right, which was made even worse by the fact that I never ever wear heels. Her ceremony was well over an hour and the bridesmaids had to stand on the stage the entire time.

Taking those heels off after the ceremony was simultaneously one of the worst and greatest feelings ever. My feet wanted to murder her.

_birdnerd_ , Devon Divine Report

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Monday
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This doesn't seem quite as bad as the rest...It's pretty common for wedding party dress code to include high heels. My question would be why they didn't fit right? Did the bride order the wrong shoes or did the bridesmaid in question buy the wrong size herself?

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#30

30 Times Bridezillas Left Their Wedding Guests Speechless The bride — who was one of my best friends and very frugal — asked me and her other bridesmaid to HAND-MAKE all of her wedding decorations! I put in 15 hours a week hand-making decorations while also working and going to school full time!

SpectralShifter , Wedding Photography Report

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N G
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think this might depend on HOW the request was made. Did she require 15 hours a week on top of school and work? When I got married I did the handmade decorations as well as work and study. On top of also organising every other aspect of my wedding, I took about 8 months - not 15 hrs a week, probably only 3-5 hours a week on those decorations. I asked my wedding party to help with other things, all about 8 months from the wedding day - they all knew the deadline, it was up to them to fit it in, and let me know if there were any problems. And nothing required 15 hours a week for 8 months to make, build, bake, or buy.

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