Imagine that today is your wedding day, and it promises to be one of the most important and happiest days of your entire life. The guests have already arrived, your groom is almost shining looking at you, and everything is ready for a delightful ceremony.
Well, now let’s continue our thought experiment. What can darken the mood of the bride on such a beautiful day, so much that it’s all she can think about? Any important issues? Health problems? Worried about her guests enjoying everything? No, none of that! In fact, all the thoughts of the bride will be occupied by one of the servers at the wedding!
Don’t believe it? Then here’s the story, first shared on the AITA Reddit community a few days ago, with nearly 18.3K upvotes and over 1.5K comments, both angry and sarcastic. Moreover, the bride herself was the author of the original post!
More info: Reddit
The Original Poster wanted to be the only star of her big day so she asked everybody to wear minimal makeup
Image credits: Dave Jimison (not the actual image)
So, the Original Poster arranged her wedding, invited guests, ordered catering from the best company – and everything should have been almost perfect, if the woman’s mood had not been overshadowed by one detail. It may seem insignificant to you and us, but the bride was literally upset.
Image credits: u/Present-Ad-3934
The thing is that the woman wanted to emphasize her role as the main star of the day, so she asked all her female guests in advance to wear minimal makeup, and all employees of the catering company who would have to work at the wedding just to wear a kind of a strict uniform.
Image credits: u/Present-Ad-3934
One of the servers, a 19 Y.O. girl, looked too flashy, according to the bride
Everyone obeyed the request but one of the servers, as it seemed to her, looked “too flashy”. The girl, about 19 years old, had clearly too much eyeliner, according to the OP. In addition, the bride was outraged that the girl had diamond studs in her ears, a flashy ring, and one of those nose studs. And finally, the server’s shirt seemed too low-cut, while her pants looked far too tight.
Image credits: William J Sisti (not the actual image)
In general, the bride, for some reason, decided that the server wanted to outshine her. She, around which the whole wedding party should revolve! No, it was literally unbearable! At first, the bride demanded to the boss of the catering company that he simply remove the girl to the back of the house. The boss said that it would be difficult because then there would not be enough staff, but they tried to do it.
Image credits: u/Present-Ad-3934
How indignant the bride was when, after some time, she saw the same server again! She once more called her boss and demanded that the girl just go home. The boss again complained about the lack of staff, but promised to come up with something. But when the guests moved to the bar counter, the OP saw the girl who so annoyed her for the third time!
Image credits: u/Present-Ad-3934
The OP ended up threatening to call the cops if the server did not go home at once
Then she simply approached the boss and stated that if the girl did not leave the building in a matter of minutes, she would immediately call the police. So finally the server was sent home.
True, the OP’s husband and mother-in-law said she was acting crazy, and that the poor college kid was now likely to be fired for literally nothing. And only the bride’s mother fully supported her daughter, saying that on the day of her own wedding, she has the right to do whatever she wants.
Image credits: Brent Miller (not the actual image)
The OP probably had some self-doubts associated with her own appearance
Bored Panda reached out to Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, to comment on this situation. “It is likely that the bride has some psychological complexes associated with her appearance, or self-doubt,” Irina comments. “It is also possible that she was so worried before the wedding that literally such a trifle caused her some version of a meltdown.”
“Of course, it was not worth calling the police, and in any case, no matter how spectacular the server looked, the bride is still the main star of her special day, and she clearly did not need to worry about it. Probably, this woman should visit a psychoanalyst to sort out reasons for such a reaction to a seemingly mundane situation. This should definitely help her in the future,” notes Irina Matveeva.
People in the comments simply told the OP to stop acting like the Evil Queen
We must say that many people in the comments to the original post were not as delicate towards the bride as our expert. Firstly, commenters do not believe that the server will be fired at all – most likely, the company staff will simply laugh at this incident. Secondly, people are upset that the bride, instead of being happy that day, ruined everything herself by obsessing over a college-aged server.
The commenters try to focus the OP’s attention on the fact that this was a server who was just doing her job, and that’s generally the last thing a bride should think about on her wedding day. She obviously needed to dance, laugh, enjoy everything – and not pretend to be the Evil Queen, like “Who is the fairest in all the land?”
By the way, we have lots of of various wedding tales, so if you’re interested in this topic, we can suggest, for example, this post of ours about a cousin who was not invited to the wedding, and she decided not to send a gift in return. And, as always, we highly welcome your comments under this post.
What is with this "nobody is allowed to be more attractive than me" at weddings these days? If the bride is so insecure or the groom is so easily seduced they should not be getting married.
If I had needed to be the prettiest at my wedding, I would've had to disinvite my sisters and my female cousins. I wasn't a bad looking young woman or anything, but I've got a lot of stunners in my family. I was never going to be the prettiest girl in the room. I'm glad I got over that young, because we're old now and some of them that were used to being the prettiest took quite a psychological hit when the inevitable happened.
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Right? And tell them what? That a woman is doing her job, come quick?!
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I love the first reply that the catering company would get it right next time. Savage!
Anyone else tired of insecure brides who all but ask everyone around her to wear a bag over their heads so that they can "stand out"?
I don't know, I'm kind of glad people show their character and behave like this. It allows me to see exactly who I don't want to be involved with. When people show you who they are, believe them kind of thing.
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Yeah, she was already the a*****e when she said guests were told to wear dark colors and minimal makeup. GTFO with that nonsense.
Thankfully when the server goes home at the end of the night, she can wash away the make up and change her clothes. But that pitiful bride will still be just as spiteful and nasty in the morning. Which is 'a look' that doesn't look good on anyone. To Server Girl, keep on being you!
Good grief, I've seen wicked stepmothers in fairytales who were less vain and jealous than this hag.
I'm in my 50's now and have friends like this. They get so crazy when cute young girls are around their men. They get all these procedures done to compete with girls half their age. We already had our time being young and cute...let them have theirs!! Nothing wrong if you want to get things done and it makes you happy, but to be jealous to the point of dictating what people wear and how they do their makeup?? You need help.
Bride was 25. This isn't a midlife crisis, she's just obnoxious.
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I an sorry but I personally don't understand why anyone believes they get to do more than provide "suggested attire". Where did this no blondes no hair beyond shoulder length, no people with left handedness no children adults pets or birds, if you have blue eyes you must wear contacts because we have brown and don't want you being the center of attention, all guests required to bring their own falcon, food not included invites came from. But I at least have a rule. If you tell me and my spouse, adults, we aren't allowed to dress ourselves because it's your special day and you have outfits, I at least will not be attending. I own 1 suit, That is what I'm wearing. I can't afford to buy a purple suit for you sorry.
The moment I read "My dream catering company" I knew this was going to be a shitshow. Who has a "dream catering company"? It's like having a "dream tire and alignment garage".
They told their guests to dress in dark colors so they could stand out??? AYFKM Where did this mentality come from that the bride and groom are supposed to be the center of attention and they can dictate to others?
Yep, if I'm buying clothes for your wedding, it'll be something I want to wear
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It sounds like the boss was just telling the bridezilla what she wanted to hear and then rolled her eyes as she walked away. Basically, the bride is mad at this server for existing and doing her job like the rest of the staff. I'll bet the bride is an HOA board member who calls the cops on children.
I actually married twice and never noticed anyone but who was talking to me at that moment. Everything else was in the background. But most of all my husband, especially the second one. She needs therapy and her husband needs to get away from her. The mother wasn't better. They both acted entitled.
Holly, think before you speak. That was unnecessary and you assuming such things is ridiculous.
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I would love to have been working as the emergency service switch board operator when she called for the police. "Hello I need the police there's an attractive woman at my wedding serving drinks".
"I want her to disappear!" She would sound like that crazy queen from Alice in Wonderland.
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What, you don't like your server to wear jewelery or make up? So you threatened her paycheck by asking for her to be sent home, and then threatened to call the police? You're totally the AH, Karen. Sympathies to the groom. Edit: Also sympathies to all service staff who have to deal with your BS.
It's not unusual for waitstaff uniform requirements to forbid stuff like that lady's jewelry. The idea is that the waitstaff should be subtle and not draw a lot of attention. If I saw a server in that kind of flashy jewelry, I'd notice. It's not impeccably professional. I wouldn't complain or anything. I'd simply notice it with a mild bit of surprise and then my mind would move on to other things that might actually matter. And I regard myself as being a pretty judgy person. I think this lady was mostly angry because the server was a pretty young lady.
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I kind-a wish this b**ch would have called the cops. Imagine the cops showing up & being asked to arrest nose-ring girl! Imagine the cop's reaction! What a sight that would be.
I guess the cops arriving would have DEFINITELY made her wedding memorable for everyone
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At her own wedding, her new husband and mother-in-law told her she was being crazy. Her OWN mother told her it was her wedding and she can do what she pleases. I truly think that the groom should have paid more attention to his MIL-to-be before he married. It seems that the little acorn didn't fall far from the tree.
I have a pretty good feeling that server didn't get fired because everyone with an ounce of humanity to knows the bride was just being an insecure b***h. They probably just said, "take the rest of the night off so this woman will quit complaining and we can get this night over with"
Shed probably make something up that would get the poor server arrested.
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More like 5 months. That number must have been an eye opener for the husband
Load More Replies... The bride disriminated against a woman doing her job because of the way she looks. I hope karma bites her in the a**e.
Don't worry it probably will either the husband eventually gets tired of her and leaves her or he gets tired of her and cheats on her.
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Wow jealous much? YTA completely. You ruined your day with your own self absorbed insecurities. No one else probably even noticed her. You need help.
Wonder what she would have told the cops. "Arrest her, she's prettier than me!" ??
That is what got me too, like what are you claiming is the actual crime or emergency here? The poor girl who has the audacity to exist and show up for work that day must be stopped! 🤣
Load More Replies... - 911 how can I help you? - help me, there is a woman with tight pants and a nose piercing serving me! It would be funny if it wasn't this sad. I hope she finds help...
"911 here, is she using her piercing in the right or left nostril? Please woman, answer quick, people's lifes are at risk right now! S.W.A.T and Delta Force are on therir way!"
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Some brides take the "it's all about me" attitude to a whole nother level.
I'm pretty sure that no one else really noticed the server until the bride started throwing a fit and drew attention to the server. But, hey! The bride got a bonus from ruining her own wedding: she now gets to be bashed on reddit/bored panda! And it's self-induced again, too...
Is this even real? A bride would take time away from the reception THREE times to complain about a server? Who sounded pretty normally dressed, to me. Not like she was in full clown makeup and costume, or something. And call the cops? For what???
She was fixated on this girl for whatever reason. I can't imagine taking time away from my guests once over nonsense like this, let alone three times!
Load More Replies... I was outshining everyone else at my wedding. Because I was over the moon happy and in love with my husband. It was an amazing day, and I start glowing just thinking back. My guests were allowed to wear whatever they wanted to. I couldn't have cared less about their looks, because all I could think about was the marriage. OP is sick with jealousy and probably radiating ugliness because of that.
Because that's how it SHOULD be. The love is supposed to outshine everything else on that day. The minute she said her dream catering company I knew she was gonna be a bridezilla and this story was gonna be gross. Its all about the show she wanted to put on for others that day. Love played no part in this day it would seem. Sad but true.
Load More Replies... That woman needs professional help asap, that kind of reaction is highly abnormal. I really hope she isn't like that all the time, otherwise her husband is going to be miserable. I don't understand the part about the guests forced to wear dark colours do the bride and groom "stand out". It's their wedding, everyone is there specifically for them, I guarantee nobody thought a server was upstaging the bride. Had they actually been called, what on earth would she have said to the police?? "There's a server at my wedding who's wearing too much eyeliner and jewellery. She's too distracting, arrest her!" :-D
you must have had a really shitty dress, hair style and make up if a server in a uniform and her regular make up could out shine you at your wedding day. and btw guests wearing dark colors...isnt this a vit more like a funeral than a wedding?
I've literally never heard of a bride telling her guests what amount of makeup to wear... that's absolutely insane to me. I understand having a dress code and having your bridesmaids follow a softer makeup look for pictures sake or whatever but guests...? That's doing too much. She could have asked the server to take off her earrings but even that seems so out of touch to me.
Oh, there are many bridezillas that tell their bridesmaids/guest what make up to wear. This is the first time l see one going after a server tho
Load More Replies... I'm so glad everyone already told her what I was thinking. Uuuugh. I'm half tempted to go find the original thread and see if she has any further commentary trying to justify this gross behavior. I would've declined my invitation the moment I'm told how much makeup I can and can't wear. Wedding culture has gotten so out of control, and it's people like her mother and MOH that fuel it by telling her what she wants to hear instead of the actual truth. Being a bride does not give you free reign to terrorize people and become a monster. 😒
I would have gone if I was closer to the groom, but I would have worn neon pink and the most dramatic colorful make up I could manage - full on stage make up but with regular make up and toned down blush to look good up close and not kill my skin like pancake make up does.
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I'm sure the police we thrilled to be called because a server was outshining a bride. At least in the bride's limited imagination. The police should have arrested the bride for wasting their time! Now that would be a reception to remember!
I would love to see it become one of those cases where they issued the bride a ticket and bill for using emergency services without having an actual emergency.
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I wish a B would call the police. And then spend her wedding night in lock up for abuse of emergency services.
You're the A-hole. Tells people how to dress at their wedding, controlling a-holes that's who
Are you the A? Way beyond that. While you're getting mental health therapy, please do not breed.
OMG... What an horrible person this bride seems to be. I hope the groom figures it out before having kids with her.
I worked at weddings to pay for uni eons ago, when brides weren't as unhinged as they are now, and even then witnessed some pretty nasty bridezillas. So l'm beyond surprise at this point.
How do people like this have friends and who the actual f**k would marry someone like this? The fact that her mother and MOH backed her up is appalling and they are totally enabling her entitlement and jealousy. This woman seriously needs to get a therapist and I really hope she does not have children any time soon.
Her family has got to be loaded. That would explain most of this story
Load More Replies... This bride is a real pos. To be honest I feel sorry for the husband - this guy now has a lifetime of her bs. That young girl was just trying to do her job.
You're the bride at your wedding. If you can't hold people's attention in that situation, the problem is not a server's appearance.
Even if some dumb-a wears white...they are not ruining your wedding, they are only embarrassing themselves.
They "are embarrassing themselves" only in the eyes of bridezillas. White is a normal colour for everybody, plus the men constantly wear white shirts at weddings. Banning women from wearing white is reserved for provincial, American weddings.
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Is this ridiculous woman that concerned that her husband is going to notice some sexy young server? What a piece of garbage. My prediction.. the marriage last 6 months at most and she will divorce him and try to take all his money. Unbelievable
And the server isn't even THAT much younger. Bride is only 25, and last time I checked that's still pretty dang young. If she's this insecure at this age I can't imagine how bad it's going to be once she hits her 30s.
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Of course comments are turned off after so many YTA's 🤣 she's too insecure so see all of these people against her. They're probably already divorced this week lmfao
Yes...this makes you a selfish a*****e. Just because you chose to waste huge amounts of money on a wedding doesn't give you the right to dictate how EVERYONE dresses...you are not an actual princess you know 😠 everything you asked people to do was selfish and arrogant. You wanted to waste your money on this ridiculous showing off...be f*****g grateful that you are getting married and you have people to share that moment with...but do not whine to me like a spoiled brat because a member of the staff was wearing too much makeup and jewelry...how DARE YOU?! I call Shame on this selfish, self absorbed spoiled little brat. You get exactly ZERO sympathy from me.
YTA. Sorry but you are... This is sad miss. You are a married woman now. Grow up.
I had a beautiful wedding that I'll never forget. Funnily enough, I didn't need to (or even think about) dictating what the guests wore, let alone how much make they had on. To do so with staff is very far into bridezilla territory. I suspect mother and mother-in-law may have been taking her side so as not to cause a big argument. I just wish the boss had stuck up for the girl.
I don't understand this things with telling your guests what to wear and how to wear their makeup to a wedding. I was never a guest at a wedding where the bride did anything like this. Was this always a thing?
As someone who's done bridal makeup for wedding parties since the early 90s, I can tell you that it was a rare occurrence once upon a time. It seems that it's been made more acceptable in recent years sadly. They get these ideas from other insane bridezillas who like her mom and maid of honor babied her and told her it was fine to act like this because it's her day. It has gotten so bad that I'm hesitant to take wedding jobs as a makeup artist, even though those are the ones that pay the most.
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Women literally can't do anything right, can they? What wild things to get upset about. If it's a uniform, she likely didn't choose her pants and shirt, they just fit her the way they fit her. I've worked several uniformed jobs where whoever had picked the uniform had never stopped to consider that some people come with curves. Not saying I know this exact situation, but I have seen similar situations where the uniform doesn't come in a ladies cut, leading to a tight fit. Also, also, isn't wearing make up considered "professional" for women? I disagree with that too, but what is the alternative for this situation? Wouldn't a server wearing oversized clothes with no make up get slack for being "unkempt" and "sloppy?" There's no winning? Also - what a weird weird dress code. Did she really enforce a funeral dress code for her own wedding? Was this a celebration or a day of mourning?? You're gonna stand out, love, everyone came to see you, not like thyre going to forget!
I will say the catering boss was an idiot for not being able to deal with this. There is no mention of the server getting a new shirt, removing the jewelry or makeup, or anything. The boss just hid her for a bit and then hoped their employer had the memory of a goldfish. I feel like THAT would be far more infuriating and distracting than the original concern over the server's appearance. Because then it becomes this battle of wills between the catering boss trying to pull one over and sneak one past, and the employers who hired them not having it and being insulted they even tried.
I got married in my work uniform on my lunch break 19 years ago. He still says I was the prettiest girl in the room.
Wow. The insecurities, bridezilla, Karen, yta and short marriage vibes are strong with this one! I just can't even understand this woman...
Darling darling........ Were you jealous of her? Or were you drooling over her and having an existential crisis on your wedding day? 'cause it seems you were the only one "distracted" by her....in any case you need help because you either have bad insecurities or a really really bad case of internalized homophobia
Yes, you are a petty, insecure, ridiculous woman who is so convinced ANYONE who was not "mousied down" would pose a threat to your day. You are also an a--hole. If you're this jealous you shouldn't be getting married. If all it takes is a bit of boob and eyeliner to steal you're day, I feel sorry for you. You would have been smarter to take the money spent on the wedding and bought a house and forget the whining.
The groom should tear up the wedding docs and run like hell. I would want everyone to look their best for a wedding. For obvious reasons, don't wear white. But requesting guests and staff to look dressed down would be insulting to the highest degree. This bride is nuts. Any bride who requests this is nuts. And needs therapy! OP you know YTA and I guarantee you don't care.
When the bitchy bride threatened to call the cops, catering boss, should have pulled all the staff, and left, and billed for entire amount
Cinderella and the ugly stepsisters, she must have missed the fairy tale
Wow! That is one scary, insecure bride. She really needs to grow up - asking the guests to wear minimum makeup and tossing a teenager out of their job for the night just because this was "her" day? A wedding is a celebration where your family and fiends are able to join in the joy of the bride AND groom. It should not be a day when everybody has to stop and think only of the bride's wants and whims. Groom should run!
Change it to 'am I an insecure bridezilla?' then yes yes you are...the only one who seemed bothered by the server is the op
You are the a*****e. You are judgmental and selfish and hateful and vain. You're so worried about your looks that you wanted everybody else to ugly themselves down. Guess what, sweetheart, you are the ugliest person in the world because your soul is black and ugly and wart ridden. I'm glad I don't know you because you sound like an awful person
Definitely YTA! I would be ashamed of you if you were my daughter! Such a b!tch and so jealous! So frightened that someone would steal your thunder on your wedding day! Pity your spouse!
I didn't even open the article. Yes, you are an a*****e! When did this wedding nonsense get so over the top? Grow up!
I didn't know you could have too much eye liner on. She probably was mad because the guest was laughing it up with the server. After the boss talked to the server and sent her back on the floor did the server take off the jewelry? I'm not seeing a boss not correct things before letting the employee to continue to work. Than she put her in the bar, so how distract was she than. She was behind the bar making drinks. I'm sure you would have had to go up to the bar to see her pants. She could have took off the jewelry. I'm just saying it was far deeper than what she lead on to be. She needs to be committed somewhere. The groom needs to run away far.
Unless this happened outside the US, she would have been in the kitchen. You can't legally handle alcohol here until you're 21.
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Wow. Anyone who feels the need to invite others over but make themselves dumb down has some serious issues. It just goes to show that no matter what, some people will always find problems where there are none to be found. Intitlement is too good of a word for these kind of people. Not only is she TA, but she is CAF.
Are we just gonna ignore the part where she asked her guests to wear dark colors and minimal makeup so she would really stand out? This is insane. Well adjusted people don't do things like that. And being upset over the poor server is just a further symptom of OP's deep problems.
...and when she looks out the window all the birds stop singin...There just ISN'T enough makeup ta cover your kind of ugly OP. YTA & so's the dumba** that married you.
She was probably wearing more makeup than an actress in Cats, with enough contouring to make her look like Morticia Addams.
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This woman has some serious self esteem issues. No one, I mean no one, outshines the bride at her own wedding. Just the way it is. She had nothing to worry about from the beginning. No one cares what the other guests or servers look like. This poor server likely wears this every day. Or at least when she's working. To tell guests what they must wear was the first red flag. I've only attended one wedding in my life that came even close to that. The invitation said "cocktail attire", because it was a late afternoon to evening function. But there was no stipulation or restriction on colors. And tell me I have to refine my makeup?? No way. This "entitled" bridezilla is in for a shock on the real world. No one is going to cater to her whims. I feel sorry for her husband.
Even servers have a dress code (be in full uniform, minimal to no makeup, uni should be clean and well-fitting, no loose jewelry). That being said, the bride was totally out of line, focusing on the one server who was mainly doing her job. The only thing I would take issue with would be the eyelashes (easily fixed, just remove them, no biggie); everything else, just fine! But the bride was so insecure that she got to the point of threatening to call the cops if the server wasn't sent home (if I was the police, I would've arrested the bride for filing a false report, and for being just an AH for general purposes)!
This Bridezilla is so worried about being the absolute center of attention, does she not realize that the cops showing up would be a *much* bigger distraction than some server wearing flashy jewelry and makeup could ever be? And then just imagine all the guests finding out *why* she called the cops, I'm sure *that* wouldn't have been an utterly humiliating experience for her. I can sympathize with feeling insecure, but there's no excuse for this kind of overreaction over something so unbelievably petty. The only one threatening to ruin this woman's big day is herself.
Yes, not only are you TA, but you're selfish, insecure and petty. Were you worried that everyone was going to get confused about who was the bride because she too had jewelry on and looked nice? Stop shaming people because they don't look how you expect them too. I hope that your name gets leaked and everyone finds out how pathetic you are. Seriously? Calling the cops because a server is (GASP) wearing makeup? You're not only TA, you're also a moron. Take some of the money that you got from your wedding and spend it on therapy. Psycho.
I don't think this happened. Who would post such a story revealing extreme insecurities over mundane issues, all the while setting yourself up to be called an a*****e by thousands of strangers. I also noticed no mention of this story being verified. Bored Panda...YTA Edit: if this was posted for entertainment purposes only (which it was) then everyone commenting here are fools for believing it to be true. You may now start calling me names for pointing out what I feel to be tremendously obvious.
Oh, I have no trouble believing it's fake or embellished. But I have been to weddings where people behavior this way. Officiated a few. An especially memorable one was were all the bridesmaids were so creeped out by the brides behavior (long story), that they each individually made an excuse to not go to the bachelorette party, without knowing the others had done the same.
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I might understand showing to much cleavage ( attempt to get tips) but the rest of the complaints are silly! You even had the audacity to tell your female guest to wear minimal makeup, really. Why didn’t you just elope? Oh yeah you required to be the center of attention …. Narcissistic much?
The bride was certainly over the top with her demands as has unfortunately become the norm these days. However, it was the supervisor of the serving staff job to accommodate. He or she should have had the server remove the jewelry and cover up when the bride first made a complaint.
That is Not an ASSH*LE...That is a certifiable idiot. Just telling her she's an assh*le is giving her more attention.
She got her a*s handed to her. What and entitled B*tch. Her husband is in for a great life!
At least make these fake stories believable -this one is such bad fiction it’s laughable.
Please stop making these stories up. This is so obvious it’s embarrassing.
Someone needs to make a movie about Bridezillas like this ..i'd watch it 😂
As much as the OP bride is indeed the A I seriously wonder what kinda upbringing she has had. For every out of control adult is a past out of control child and seriously the parents are responsible. Parents don't let your kids grow up to be like this person.
As an adult your in control of who you are. She chooses to be this way, that's the bottom line. Her husband and mil both told her she was acting crazy and she still chose this path. Now her wedding will be remembered by everyone there but not because how "beautiful" she looked but how bat *hit crazy she is.
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I don't know... I get the feeling that this also has to do with racism... I wish someone asked her if the server was black. It's just insane for someone to be this insecure without some bizarre thing like racism behind. Eyeliner? This can't be the real issue
I'll admit, one of my first thoughts upon reading was "Geez, this bride sounds like one of those Karens who threatens to call the cops whenever there's a black guy simply existing within 20 ft. of her." Can't say for sure that's what happened here, and I can fully believe that people like this don't need racism as an excuse to be horrible, but it also wouldn't surprise me.
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In this case, if the customer wanted it and it is doable, why did the company disregard her request? Sounds like they didn't take the bride too seriously. If a man had made the request it would have happened right away. I would have been furious too.
They didn't take her seriously because she was behaving like the spoiled brat she probably is.
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You’re excusing abusive, “crazy” (per MOH et al) behavior with the *assumption* it was anxiety. This is the epitome of a logical fallacy. Just because she didn’t directly *harass* the server, but instead *hyperfocused* on a pretty standard dress then relentlessly *nagged* catering manager, including making *threats* (side note: labor law protecting employee trumped anything this woman said/did/wanted) that weren’t rational or would have been effective. NONE of *these* actions & behaviors is excusable, be they motivated by anxiety (unlikely) or the more plausible entitlement of the bride. STOP. EXCUSING. ABUSE. WITH. EMOTIONS. No anxiety, stress, worry makes abuse and harassment OK. SMH…damn apologists!!
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What is with this "nobody is allowed to be more attractive than me" at weddings these days? If the bride is so insecure or the groom is so easily seduced they should not be getting married.
If I had needed to be the prettiest at my wedding, I would've had to disinvite my sisters and my female cousins. I wasn't a bad looking young woman or anything, but I've got a lot of stunners in my family. I was never going to be the prettiest girl in the room. I'm glad I got over that young, because we're old now and some of them that were used to being the prettiest took quite a psychological hit when the inevitable happened.
Load More Replies... Right? And tell them what? That a woman is doing her job, come quick?!
Load More Replies... I love the first reply that the catering company would get it right next time. Savage!
Anyone else tired of insecure brides who all but ask everyone around her to wear a bag over their heads so that they can "stand out"?
I don't know, I'm kind of glad people show their character and behave like this. It allows me to see exactly who I don't want to be involved with. When people show you who they are, believe them kind of thing.
Load More Replies... Yeah, she was already the a*****e when she said guests were told to wear dark colors and minimal makeup. GTFO with that nonsense.
Thankfully when the server goes home at the end of the night, she can wash away the make up and change her clothes. But that pitiful bride will still be just as spiteful and nasty in the morning. Which is 'a look' that doesn't look good on anyone. To Server Girl, keep on being you!
Good grief, I've seen wicked stepmothers in fairytales who were less vain and jealous than this hag.
I'm in my 50's now and have friends like this. They get so crazy when cute young girls are around their men. They get all these procedures done to compete with girls half their age. We already had our time being young and cute...let them have theirs!! Nothing wrong if you want to get things done and it makes you happy, but to be jealous to the point of dictating what people wear and how they do their makeup?? You need help.
Bride was 25. This isn't a midlife crisis, she's just obnoxious.
Load More Replies... I an sorry but I personally don't understand why anyone believes they get to do more than provide "suggested attire". Where did this no blondes no hair beyond shoulder length, no people with left handedness no children adults pets or birds, if you have blue eyes you must wear contacts because we have brown and don't want you being the center of attention, all guests required to bring their own falcon, food not included invites came from. But I at least have a rule. If you tell me and my spouse, adults, we aren't allowed to dress ourselves because it's your special day and you have outfits, I at least will not be attending. I own 1 suit, That is what I'm wearing. I can't afford to buy a purple suit for you sorry.
The moment I read "My dream catering company" I knew this was going to be a shitshow. Who has a "dream catering company"? It's like having a "dream tire and alignment garage".
They told their guests to dress in dark colors so they could stand out??? AYFKM Where did this mentality come from that the bride and groom are supposed to be the center of attention and they can dictate to others?
Yep, if I'm buying clothes for your wedding, it'll be something I want to wear
Load More Replies... It sounds like the boss was just telling the bridezilla what she wanted to hear and then rolled her eyes as she walked away. Basically, the bride is mad at this server for existing and doing her job like the rest of the staff. I'll bet the bride is an HOA board member who calls the cops on children.
I actually married twice and never noticed anyone but who was talking to me at that moment. Everything else was in the background. But most of all my husband, especially the second one. She needs therapy and her husband needs to get away from her. The mother wasn't better. They both acted entitled.
Holly, think before you speak. That was unnecessary and you assuming such things is ridiculous.
Load More Replies... I would love to have been working as the emergency service switch board operator when she called for the police. "Hello I need the police there's an attractive woman at my wedding serving drinks".
"I want her to disappear!" She would sound like that crazy queen from Alice in Wonderland.
Load More Replies... What, you don't like your server to wear jewelery or make up? So you threatened her paycheck by asking for her to be sent home, and then threatened to call the police? You're totally the AH, Karen. Sympathies to the groom. Edit: Also sympathies to all service staff who have to deal with your BS.
It's not unusual for waitstaff uniform requirements to forbid stuff like that lady's jewelry. The idea is that the waitstaff should be subtle and not draw a lot of attention. If I saw a server in that kind of flashy jewelry, I'd notice. It's not impeccably professional. I wouldn't complain or anything. I'd simply notice it with a mild bit of surprise and then my mind would move on to other things that might actually matter. And I regard myself as being a pretty judgy person. I think this lady was mostly angry because the server was a pretty young lady.
Load More Replies... I kind-a wish this b**ch would have called the cops. Imagine the cops showing up & being asked to arrest nose-ring girl! Imagine the cop's reaction! What a sight that would be.
I guess the cops arriving would have DEFINITELY made her wedding memorable for everyone
Load More Replies... At her own wedding, her new husband and mother-in-law told her she was being crazy. Her OWN mother told her it was her wedding and she can do what she pleases. I truly think that the groom should have paid more attention to his MIL-to-be before he married. It seems that the little acorn didn't fall far from the tree.
I have a pretty good feeling that server didn't get fired because everyone with an ounce of humanity to knows the bride was just being an insecure b***h. They probably just said, "take the rest of the night off so this woman will quit complaining and we can get this night over with"
Shed probably make something up that would get the poor server arrested.
Load More Replies... More like 5 months. That number must have been an eye opener for the husband
Load More Replies... The bride disriminated against a woman doing her job because of the way she looks. I hope karma bites her in the a**e.
Don't worry it probably will either the husband eventually gets tired of her and leaves her or he gets tired of her and cheats on her.
Load More Replies... Wow jealous much? YTA completely. You ruined your day with your own self absorbed insecurities. No one else probably even noticed her. You need help.
Wonder what she would have told the cops. "Arrest her, she's prettier than me!" ??
That is what got me too, like what are you claiming is the actual crime or emergency here? The poor girl who has the audacity to exist and show up for work that day must be stopped! 🤣
Load More Replies... - 911 how can I help you? - help me, there is a woman with tight pants and a nose piercing serving me! It would be funny if it wasn't this sad. I hope she finds help...
"911 here, is she using her piercing in the right or left nostril? Please woman, answer quick, people's lifes are at risk right now! S.W.A.T and Delta Force are on therir way!"
Load More Replies... Some brides take the "it's all about me" attitude to a whole nother level.
I'm pretty sure that no one else really noticed the server until the bride started throwing a fit and drew attention to the server. But, hey! The bride got a bonus from ruining her own wedding: she now gets to be bashed on reddit/bored panda! And it's self-induced again, too...
Is this even real? A bride would take time away from the reception THREE times to complain about a server? Who sounded pretty normally dressed, to me. Not like she was in full clown makeup and costume, or something. And call the cops? For what???
She was fixated on this girl for whatever reason. I can't imagine taking time away from my guests once over nonsense like this, let alone three times!
Load More Replies... I was outshining everyone else at my wedding. Because I was over the moon happy and in love with my husband. It was an amazing day, and I start glowing just thinking back. My guests were allowed to wear whatever they wanted to. I couldn't have cared less about their looks, because all I could think about was the marriage. OP is sick with jealousy and probably radiating ugliness because of that.
Because that's how it SHOULD be. The love is supposed to outshine everything else on that day. The minute she said her dream catering company I knew she was gonna be a bridezilla and this story was gonna be gross. Its all about the show she wanted to put on for others that day. Love played no part in this day it would seem. Sad but true.
Load More Replies... That woman needs professional help asap, that kind of reaction is highly abnormal. I really hope she isn't like that all the time, otherwise her husband is going to be miserable. I don't understand the part about the guests forced to wear dark colours do the bride and groom "stand out". It's their wedding, everyone is there specifically for them, I guarantee nobody thought a server was upstaging the bride. Had they actually been called, what on earth would she have said to the police?? "There's a server at my wedding who's wearing too much eyeliner and jewellery. She's too distracting, arrest her!" :-D
you must have had a really shitty dress, hair style and make up if a server in a uniform and her regular make up could out shine you at your wedding day. and btw guests wearing dark colors...isnt this a vit more like a funeral than a wedding?
I've literally never heard of a bride telling her guests what amount of makeup to wear... that's absolutely insane to me. I understand having a dress code and having your bridesmaids follow a softer makeup look for pictures sake or whatever but guests...? That's doing too much. She could have asked the server to take off her earrings but even that seems so out of touch to me.
Oh, there are many bridezillas that tell their bridesmaids/guest what make up to wear. This is the first time l see one going after a server tho
Load More Replies... I'm so glad everyone already told her what I was thinking. Uuuugh. I'm half tempted to go find the original thread and see if she has any further commentary trying to justify this gross behavior. I would've declined my invitation the moment I'm told how much makeup I can and can't wear. Wedding culture has gotten so out of control, and it's people like her mother and MOH that fuel it by telling her what she wants to hear instead of the actual truth. Being a bride does not give you free reign to terrorize people and become a monster. 😒
I would have gone if I was closer to the groom, but I would have worn neon pink and the most dramatic colorful make up I could manage - full on stage make up but with regular make up and toned down blush to look good up close and not kill my skin like pancake make up does.
Load More Replies... I'm sure the police we thrilled to be called because a server was outshining a bride. At least in the bride's limited imagination. The police should have arrested the bride for wasting their time! Now that would be a reception to remember!
I would love to see it become one of those cases where they issued the bride a ticket and bill for using emergency services without having an actual emergency.
Load More Replies... I wish a B would call the police. And then spend her wedding night in lock up for abuse of emergency services.
You're the A-hole. Tells people how to dress at their wedding, controlling a-holes that's who
Are you the A? Way beyond that. While you're getting mental health therapy, please do not breed.
OMG... What an horrible person this bride seems to be. I hope the groom figures it out before having kids with her.
I worked at weddings to pay for uni eons ago, when brides weren't as unhinged as they are now, and even then witnessed some pretty nasty bridezillas. So l'm beyond surprise at this point.
How do people like this have friends and who the actual f**k would marry someone like this? The fact that her mother and MOH backed her up is appalling and they are totally enabling her entitlement and jealousy. This woman seriously needs to get a therapist and I really hope she does not have children any time soon.
Her family has got to be loaded. That would explain most of this story
Load More Replies... This bride is a real pos. To be honest I feel sorry for the husband - this guy now has a lifetime of her bs. That young girl was just trying to do her job.
You're the bride at your wedding. If you can't hold people's attention in that situation, the problem is not a server's appearance.
Even if some dumb-a wears white...they are not ruining your wedding, they are only embarrassing themselves.
They "are embarrassing themselves" only in the eyes of bridezillas. White is a normal colour for everybody, plus the men constantly wear white shirts at weddings. Banning women from wearing white is reserved for provincial, American weddings.
Load More Replies... Is this ridiculous woman that concerned that her husband is going to notice some sexy young server? What a piece of garbage. My prediction.. the marriage last 6 months at most and she will divorce him and try to take all his money. Unbelievable
And the server isn't even THAT much younger. Bride is only 25, and last time I checked that's still pretty dang young. If she's this insecure at this age I can't imagine how bad it's going to be once she hits her 30s.
Load More Replies... Of course comments are turned off after so many YTA's 🤣 she's too insecure so see all of these people against her. They're probably already divorced this week lmfao
Yes...this makes you a selfish a*****e. Just because you chose to waste huge amounts of money on a wedding doesn't give you the right to dictate how EVERYONE dresses...you are not an actual princess you know 😠 everything you asked people to do was selfish and arrogant. You wanted to waste your money on this ridiculous showing off...be f*****g grateful that you are getting married and you have people to share that moment with...but do not whine to me like a spoiled brat because a member of the staff was wearing too much makeup and jewelry...how DARE YOU?! I call Shame on this selfish, self absorbed spoiled little brat. You get exactly ZERO sympathy from me.
YTA. Sorry but you are... This is sad miss. You are a married woman now. Grow up.
I had a beautiful wedding that I'll never forget. Funnily enough, I didn't need to (or even think about) dictating what the guests wore, let alone how much make they had on. To do so with staff is very far into bridezilla territory. I suspect mother and mother-in-law may have been taking her side so as not to cause a big argument. I just wish the boss had stuck up for the girl.
I don't understand this things with telling your guests what to wear and how to wear their makeup to a wedding. I was never a guest at a wedding where the bride did anything like this. Was this always a thing?
As someone who's done bridal makeup for wedding parties since the early 90s, I can tell you that it was a rare occurrence once upon a time. It seems that it's been made more acceptable in recent years sadly. They get these ideas from other insane bridezillas who like her mom and maid of honor babied her and told her it was fine to act like this because it's her day. It has gotten so bad that I'm hesitant to take wedding jobs as a makeup artist, even though those are the ones that pay the most.
Load More Replies... Women literally can't do anything right, can they? What wild things to get upset about. If it's a uniform, she likely didn't choose her pants and shirt, they just fit her the way they fit her. I've worked several uniformed jobs where whoever had picked the uniform had never stopped to consider that some people come with curves. Not saying I know this exact situation, but I have seen similar situations where the uniform doesn't come in a ladies cut, leading to a tight fit. Also, also, isn't wearing make up considered "professional" for women? I disagree with that too, but what is the alternative for this situation? Wouldn't a server wearing oversized clothes with no make up get slack for being "unkempt" and "sloppy?" There's no winning? Also - what a weird weird dress code. Did she really enforce a funeral dress code for her own wedding? Was this a celebration or a day of mourning?? You're gonna stand out, love, everyone came to see you, not like thyre going to forget!
I will say the catering boss was an idiot for not being able to deal with this. There is no mention of the server getting a new shirt, removing the jewelry or makeup, or anything. The boss just hid her for a bit and then hoped their employer had the memory of a goldfish. I feel like THAT would be far more infuriating and distracting than the original concern over the server's appearance. Because then it becomes this battle of wills between the catering boss trying to pull one over and sneak one past, and the employers who hired them not having it and being insulted they even tried.
I got married in my work uniform on my lunch break 19 years ago. He still says I was the prettiest girl in the room.
Wow. The insecurities, bridezilla, Karen, yta and short marriage vibes are strong with this one! I just can't even understand this woman...
Darling darling........ Were you jealous of her? Or were you drooling over her and having an existential crisis on your wedding day? 'cause it seems you were the only one "distracted" by her....in any case you need help because you either have bad insecurities or a really really bad case of internalized homophobia
Yes, you are a petty, insecure, ridiculous woman who is so convinced ANYONE who was not "mousied down" would pose a threat to your day. You are also an a--hole. If you're this jealous you shouldn't be getting married. If all it takes is a bit of boob and eyeliner to steal you're day, I feel sorry for you. You would have been smarter to take the money spent on the wedding and bought a house and forget the whining.
The groom should tear up the wedding docs and run like hell. I would want everyone to look their best for a wedding. For obvious reasons, don't wear white. But requesting guests and staff to look dressed down would be insulting to the highest degree. This bride is nuts. Any bride who requests this is nuts. And needs therapy! OP you know YTA and I guarantee you don't care.
When the bitchy bride threatened to call the cops, catering boss, should have pulled all the staff, and left, and billed for entire amount
Cinderella and the ugly stepsisters, she must have missed the fairy tale
Wow! That is one scary, insecure bride. She really needs to grow up - asking the guests to wear minimum makeup and tossing a teenager out of their job for the night just because this was "her" day? A wedding is a celebration where your family and fiends are able to join in the joy of the bride AND groom. It should not be a day when everybody has to stop and think only of the bride's wants and whims. Groom should run!
Change it to 'am I an insecure bridezilla?' then yes yes you are...the only one who seemed bothered by the server is the op
You are the a*****e. You are judgmental and selfish and hateful and vain. You're so worried about your looks that you wanted everybody else to ugly themselves down. Guess what, sweetheart, you are the ugliest person in the world because your soul is black and ugly and wart ridden. I'm glad I don't know you because you sound like an awful person
Definitely YTA! I would be ashamed of you if you were my daughter! Such a b!tch and so jealous! So frightened that someone would steal your thunder on your wedding day! Pity your spouse!
I didn't even open the article. Yes, you are an a*****e! When did this wedding nonsense get so over the top? Grow up!
I didn't know you could have too much eye liner on. She probably was mad because the guest was laughing it up with the server. After the boss talked to the server and sent her back on the floor did the server take off the jewelry? I'm not seeing a boss not correct things before letting the employee to continue to work. Than she put her in the bar, so how distract was she than. She was behind the bar making drinks. I'm sure you would have had to go up to the bar to see her pants. She could have took off the jewelry. I'm just saying it was far deeper than what she lead on to be. She needs to be committed somewhere. The groom needs to run away far.
Unless this happened outside the US, she would have been in the kitchen. You can't legally handle alcohol here until you're 21.
Load More Replies... Wow. Anyone who feels the need to invite others over but make themselves dumb down has some serious issues. It just goes to show that no matter what, some people will always find problems where there are none to be found. Intitlement is too good of a word for these kind of people. Not only is she TA, but she is CAF.
Are we just gonna ignore the part where she asked her guests to wear dark colors and minimal makeup so she would really stand out? This is insane. Well adjusted people don't do things like that. And being upset over the poor server is just a further symptom of OP's deep problems.
...and when she looks out the window all the birds stop singin...There just ISN'T enough makeup ta cover your kind of ugly OP. YTA & so's the dumba** that married you.
She was probably wearing more makeup than an actress in Cats, with enough contouring to make her look like Morticia Addams.
Load More Replies... This woman has some serious self esteem issues. No one, I mean no one, outshines the bride at her own wedding. Just the way it is. She had nothing to worry about from the beginning. No one cares what the other guests or servers look like. This poor server likely wears this every day. Or at least when she's working. To tell guests what they must wear was the first red flag. I've only attended one wedding in my life that came even close to that. The invitation said "cocktail attire", because it was a late afternoon to evening function. But there was no stipulation or restriction on colors. And tell me I have to refine my makeup?? No way. This "entitled" bridezilla is in for a shock on the real world. No one is going to cater to her whims. I feel sorry for her husband.
Even servers have a dress code (be in full uniform, minimal to no makeup, uni should be clean and well-fitting, no loose jewelry). That being said, the bride was totally out of line, focusing on the one server who was mainly doing her job. The only thing I would take issue with would be the eyelashes (easily fixed, just remove them, no biggie); everything else, just fine! But the bride was so insecure that she got to the point of threatening to call the cops if the server wasn't sent home (if I was the police, I would've arrested the bride for filing a false report, and for being just an AH for general purposes)!
This Bridezilla is so worried about being the absolute center of attention, does she not realize that the cops showing up would be a *much* bigger distraction than some server wearing flashy jewelry and makeup could ever be? And then just imagine all the guests finding out *why* she called the cops, I'm sure *that* wouldn't have been an utterly humiliating experience for her. I can sympathize with feeling insecure, but there's no excuse for this kind of overreaction over something so unbelievably petty. The only one threatening to ruin this woman's big day is herself.
Yes, not only are you TA, but you're selfish, insecure and petty. Were you worried that everyone was going to get confused about who was the bride because she too had jewelry on and looked nice? Stop shaming people because they don't look how you expect them too. I hope that your name gets leaked and everyone finds out how pathetic you are. Seriously? Calling the cops because a server is (GASP) wearing makeup? You're not only TA, you're also a moron. Take some of the money that you got from your wedding and spend it on therapy. Psycho.
I don't think this happened. Who would post such a story revealing extreme insecurities over mundane issues, all the while setting yourself up to be called an a*****e by thousands of strangers. I also noticed no mention of this story being verified. Bored Panda...YTA Edit: if this was posted for entertainment purposes only (which it was) then everyone commenting here are fools for believing it to be true. You may now start calling me names for pointing out what I feel to be tremendously obvious.
Oh, I have no trouble believing it's fake or embellished. But I have been to weddings where people behavior this way. Officiated a few. An especially memorable one was were all the bridesmaids were so creeped out by the brides behavior (long story), that they each individually made an excuse to not go to the bachelorette party, without knowing the others had done the same.
Load More Replies... I might understand showing to much cleavage ( attempt to get tips) but the rest of the complaints are silly! You even had the audacity to tell your female guest to wear minimal makeup, really. Why didn’t you just elope? Oh yeah you required to be the center of attention …. Narcissistic much?
The bride was certainly over the top with her demands as has unfortunately become the norm these days. However, it was the supervisor of the serving staff job to accommodate. He or she should have had the server remove the jewelry and cover up when the bride first made a complaint.
That is Not an ASSH*LE...That is a certifiable idiot. Just telling her she's an assh*le is giving her more attention.
She got her a*s handed to her. What and entitled B*tch. Her husband is in for a great life!
At least make these fake stories believable -this one is such bad fiction it’s laughable.
Please stop making these stories up. This is so obvious it’s embarrassing.
Someone needs to make a movie about Bridezillas like this ..i'd watch it 😂
As much as the OP bride is indeed the A I seriously wonder what kinda upbringing she has had. For every out of control adult is a past out of control child and seriously the parents are responsible. Parents don't let your kids grow up to be like this person.
As an adult your in control of who you are. She chooses to be this way, that's the bottom line. Her husband and mil both told her she was acting crazy and she still chose this path. Now her wedding will be remembered by everyone there but not because how "beautiful" she looked but how bat *hit crazy she is.
Load More Replies... I don't know... I get the feeling that this also has to do with racism... I wish someone asked her if the server was black. It's just insane for someone to be this insecure without some bizarre thing like racism behind. Eyeliner? This can't be the real issue
I'll admit, one of my first thoughts upon reading was "Geez, this bride sounds like one of those Karens who threatens to call the cops whenever there's a black guy simply existing within 20 ft. of her." Can't say for sure that's what happened here, and I can fully believe that people like this don't need racism as an excuse to be horrible, but it also wouldn't surprise me.
Load More Replies... In this case, if the customer wanted it and it is doable, why did the company disregard her request? Sounds like they didn't take the bride too seriously. If a man had made the request it would have happened right away. I would have been furious too.
They didn't take her seriously because she was behaving like the spoiled brat she probably is.
Load More Replies... You’re excusing abusive, “crazy” (per MOH et al) behavior with the *assumption* it was anxiety. This is the epitome of a logical fallacy. Just because she didn’t directly *harass* the server, but instead *hyperfocused* on a pretty standard dress then relentlessly *nagged* catering manager, including making *threats* (side note: labor law protecting employee trumped anything this woman said/did/wanted) that weren’t rational or would have been effective. NONE of *these* actions & behaviors is excusable, be they motivated by anxiety (unlikely) or the more plausible entitlement of the bride. STOP. EXCUSING. ABUSE. WITH. EMOTIONS. No anxiety, stress, worry makes abuse and harassment OK. SMH…damn apologists!!
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