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Members Of This Online Group Are Annoyed With People Not Having Common Sense And Ignoring These 40 Unwritten Rules
InterviewThere are a lot of etiquette rules that people have to follow in order to prove themselves to be polite and respectful individuals. We learn those things from family members, teachers, and other people. However, not everyone likes to apply these rules or they simply don’t know about them and this might annoy some of those who find these things to be common knowledge. Having this in mind, one Reddit user @HAXposed asked others online what are some of the unspoken rules that people tend to break that annoy them.
The question that received 47.5k upvotes received various answers, stating that sometimes people forget to say thank you or talk with a full mouth of food, they like to listen to music loudly or have someone on speakerphone without the other caller knowing. These are only a few things that Reddit users find annoying and rude.
What other unspoken rules can you add to this list? Don’t forget to leave your thoughts in the comments down below!
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If you see me taking off my headphones to listen and answer your question, then inmediately put them on again... 5 TIMES... it clearly means that I'm just being polite, not that I'm interested in talking to you, so STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS.
That it's common courtesy to say "thank you" after receiving help/service from someone else.
If someone says they’re not drinking tonight, don’t make them feel bad or imply they are being boring
Even though there are a lot of things that we might think are common knowledge, everyone came from different backgrounds and families and was taught different things and encountered different situations in life. One can only envy a person who seems to always know how to act, what to say, or how to avoid any awkward situations or putting themselves in an embarrassing position. The question is, can we learn these rules? Yes, and there are some people who are great at mastering the art of etiquette. One of them is Diane Gottsman, an international etiquette expert, author and founder of The Protocol School of Texas. For those who are interested in finding some more tips and tricks on etiquette, the woman shares them on her social media. Bored Panda contacted the expert to find out more on the matter.
Asking couples when they’re going to be having kids. Not every couple wants/can have kids
Standing in f**king doorways, go in or out, but get the f**k out of the way.
How about the people who get off an escalator and stand right in front of the step? They're not only rude but they're dangerous.
Don’t ask people to do their job for free, even if you’re friends or family.
Many might agree that the way a person behaves in front of others means a lot and allows others to form an opinion about that person. But do we pay enough attention to how we behave in front of others, in public places, and at home? Gottsman explained that “it is natural that people will feel more relaxed when they are in the company of those they are most comfortable with. When you’re at home, by yourself, if you pick a green bean up off your plate, it’s not as egregious as when you do the same thing in front of a client or on a job interview.” The woman concluded by stating that “people are conscious of how others perceive them and are always trying to put their best foot forward when possible. Sometimes, they just aren’t aware of how to do it.”
Turn signals. They're meant to be a warning, not an afterthought
Don’t play music out loud from your mobile phones on public transportation. I get that you’re going to have a boring ride but don’t ruin everyone else’s.
No, this is beyond that. People playing music like that are actively looking for negative interactions.
Load More Replies...The worst is at the beach. Full of people and the one who can't enjoy the outdoor without blasting their crap music.
I remember seeing someone walking around the beach this past summer carrying around a speaker and blasting music. What a d**k.
Load More Replies...NO OK I remember going on the subway once and it was crowded as HECK and this guy's just watching a full on action movie out loud, and getting mad at people to tell him to turn it off
oop i forgot to add: HE HAD HEADPHONES AROUND HIS NECK
Load More Replies...I saw someone stand right next to someone doing this and dancing like Elaine from Seinfeld until they got the message and turned off the music.
Or watch a soccer match with the volume on high when in a doctor's office waiting room.
Load More Replies...This also applies to work. Just because you like your music, it doesn't mean anyone else does. Even if I do happen to like it, it doesn't mean that I can focus at the volume you play it ... or that I will still be able to hear any of the important alarms I'm listening for... oh, never mind the BiPAP that's been going off for ten minutes, I'm sure they'll be satting just fine when I finally figure it out 🙄
I restore retro electronics as a sideline and was travelling across Central London on a fairly full bus. There were a couple of idiots playing music loudly from there phones, ignoring requests to turn them down/off. As the journey progressed, the passengers thinned out until it was basically just them and I on the bus. At this point, I picked up the newly repaired 80's Sony boom-box from the seat beside me, inserted a cassette, aimed the speakers towards the idiots and pressed play. Apparently they were not fans of Tchaikovsky!
Yes chances are we don't share you taste in music. In fact, we are repulsed by this, and it's not only because of the horrendous playlist.
Don’t play music out loud from your mobile phones (or any source) in public, period.
A think one of the biggest marks of immaturity is inflicting your music on others and assuming they will like it.
Similarly, blaring their music from their vehicle at the gas station. Bonus jerk store points: it's these inconsiderate a$$holes that leave the vehicle running in order to blare their shite music, so they also break the law and risk an explosion!
This is such ridiculous behavior that it shouldn't even need to be said. When people do this i take out my phone and start blasting the worst possible annoying music over them just to annoy them. How selfish do you have to be, honestly? I waas on a bus and a girl got into a fight with her boyfriend on speaker phone screaming at the top of her lungs and the guy behind her said jokingly 'i'm with him on this one'. She turned around and told him to mind his own f'ing business and literally everyone within a few seats of her just looked at each other and he was like 'you're making it my business.' She was just rude and entitled afterward just flipping us all off and cursing at us. It went on for like 30 minutes, this loud fight on the phone. I'm so tired of these people. Then she called us racists, which was hilarious because the guy she was most angry with was also black so he just started laughing. it was insane.
Unfortunately it’s in some peoples nature to make as much noise as possible knowing it’s annoying everyone around them.
as an interesting thing, depending on your state/city, playing your music on public transportation out loud can actually land you a fine, or in extreme cases(as my brother once witnessed with a guy blasting a boombox and refusing to turn it off and then fighting with the security) arrested.
A decent pair of earphones are getting cheaper and cheaper, no excuse. If you want it to last longer store them in a small case, use them carefully, and never use them while sleeping (it's dangerous for your ears as well).
Or talk so loudly on your phone EVERYONE around you can hear the conversation. Or worse feel the need to put the call on speaker.
90% of the people around you don't like your music. The ones who do already wearing head/ear phones.
People who use their phones like they're voice recorders when they talk to someone on the speaker. Hold your dang phone properly! The only time I want to eavesdrop a conversation is if you're being called an idiot.
I hate these people so much. I've lost the energy ti confront them. Every day it is some one. And from their cars too, oh my god
Don't play music or watch videos out loud ANYWHERE public! Obnoxious.
Should've also added to not sing out loud the to music you're listening to. This isn't your chance for a big break. I just worked a long day and you should be considerate enough to not bother everyone.
Move your cart to the side of the aisle when looking for groceries, don't hog up the middle. "Oh, of course I'll wait for you to pick out a flavor of beans, Sharon, take your time!"
The good thing is that people are ready to learn and change. The etiquette expert revealed that during her work with university students and corporate CEOs, she noticed how much effort her students put into learning and doing their best. “It takes training. We are not born with social skills and norms and customs are different in different cultures and it’s important to be familiar.”
Having in mind the recent situation the whole world has had to face, Gottsman agreed that the pandemic had an impact on people’s behavior. Even though little by little, the world is trying to get back to normal, it still “feels awkward.” The woman stressed that “our greetings have changed and many social behaviors that were once excepted have now been put on hold to keep ourselves and others healthy. We have to relearn our social skills and be aware of other peoples awkward moments.”
You don't need to attach yourself to the person in front of you when standing in queue
Stand 2m back from the airport baggage carousel. If everyone does it, then enters that ring to grab their luggage and leave, then everyone can see their luggage as it comes and no one is jostling.
It never occurred to me until I traveled in South Korea and they had a white line around the carousel that everyone stood on. It was remarkably efficient and I wish the rest of the world adopted it.
It might seem that a lot has changed and everyone has been impacted by the suddenly changed global order. What is important to consider, according to the specialist, is that “kindness still matters, and most people are aware that this is an opportunity to show compassion to other human beings.”
Let people know when you have them on speakerphone! Especially when your husband/wife/partner/friend/any other human is within earshot.
That leaving your shopping cart in the middle of the parking lot is lazy and just plain rude. I hate finding a parking spot only to realize that there’s a f**king shopping cart already taking up the spot…
I hate this - people are so lazy! I enjoy Cart Narcs on Youtube - they confront these idiots and it's really gratifying. https://www.youtube.com/c/CartNarcs
Respect people's right to say no. It's okay to ask someone for something, or to do something, or whatever - but if they say no, don't pester them or guilt trip them. People who pressure their friends are kind of garbage friends.
You shouldn't be texting while driving. That's a given. But for the love of all that is holy, if you are the lead car at a red light PAY ATTENTION TO THE LIGHT. Some lights are short and all of us need to get through it. Update Twitter later.
I take my line leader duty seriously.
conversely, if you are behind the lead car, don't honk the horn the split second that it turns green.
When someone hands you their phone to use, don't f**king go through it. It's rude.
Do people really do this? Another reason not to let anybody use your phone, I guess.
Waiting for others to exit an elevator or train before entering.
Saying thank you when someone holds a door open.
One-for-one when merging lanes in heavy traffic.
I had someone try to force himself into an elevator while I was leaving. I said, "Out then in." He said, "What?!" I said people get off of the elevator first, then people can go in. He said, "Wow, I didn't know that was a rule. That makes a lot of sense!" I think he was probably more polite after that, although the people who were waiting for him to finish this conversation so they could let the elevator door shut weren't that happy with him.
Waving when someone let's you in, in traffic.
I always wave! Come on, it's another human in that vehicle. It's a nice thing and hopefully it's paid forward, it's good karma, I mean carma.
Offer a glass of water to anyone providing physically stressful service at your place. Eg. Furniture delivery guy.
Lots of ppl assume that they are just doing their job, bit doesn't mean you forget basic human courtesy
Don’t immediately assume it’s okay to smoke in someone’s house, regardless of their living situation. I don’t care if it’s literally a cardboard box or an upscale mansion. Ask first.
If someone is paying for your food, don’t order something expensive.
Cover your mouth when you sneeze, apparently people don't know this
If you're in a theater with plenty of available seats, don't sit right next to a total stranger.
there's a mens room rule like this, too. at an open bank of urinals, don't pick the one right next to someone else. you're there to pee, not chit chat.
If you aren't friends with someone anymore, it doesn't mean you can go around telling their secrets to everyone. "Secrets are secrets and under no condition shall they be broken."
It's truly disgusting to see how people don't realize this. It's basic knowledge you should know though it hasn't been made as an actual rule.
Warn people that you/your kid is sick before turning up at their house/interacting with them. Chicken pox, flu, hand foot and mouth, stomach bug all caught by my toddler in the last 12months and could have been avoided.
If someone pays for something for you (I'm not talking about as a gift, I just mean 'We can't split the bill here so I'll pay and you can pay me your half later', 'I'll buy both of our concert tickets now and you can revolut me for it later', etc) you really shouldn't make them ask you to pay them back. Ideally not even once, but especially not two or three times.
If I owe someone money like that I make sure to pay them back as soon as I can and let them know once I've done it. I have a friend who I know is not short on money, but I stopped offering to pay for things for him in situations like the above because he just forgets and makes you ask him two or even three times before he does it. I really think that's not fair to people. You're putting them in an uncomfortable position.
Bathroom door closed = "occupied."
Bathroom door open wide = "available."
Bathroom door slightly ajar with exhaust fan running = "enter at your own risk."
Hold the door open for the person behind you if they are close, atleast long enough to prevent the door from being slammed shut on their face.
And say thank you or you're welcome. If I hold a door for you, and you don't say anything, I just say "You're Welcome!" so they hear me. Basic civilities and manners, people!
If you’re out at a restaurant/party/event with someone don’t offer any criticisms about their appearance unless they can actually change it.
“Oh thank you for pointing out the spot I missed shaving. I’ll just spend the rest of the night thinking about it and how I can do nothing about it.”
On the other hand, please tell someone that they have something amiss with themselves. If I see a someone with toilet paper on their shoe, zipper is down, exposed nipple, toupee is coming off, whatever; I will always quietly let them know. I'd rather be embarrassed in front of one person who tells me, instead of 50 people who are giggling at me.
If someone is hosting you, don’t insult or give a negative critique of their home. Some people have fewer resources than others, only one income to live off of, and have worked very hard to get less, etc. No need to point out home imperfections.
Do people really do this? Are they lacking the general politeness gene? How self-entitled do you have to be to receive an invitation to someone's home and immediately say "You have. Ahuge stain on your hideous green carpet - what dreadful decorating! Is this sofa...*gasp* second-hand?!"
Talking through movies. I can only say "yeah" and "mhm" so many times
Exactly! If the actors have spent time learning their lines, got into makeup and performed their part for the director and cinematographer to get the perfect shot, then no, it isn't 'them just talking', it's an integral part of the story. Please just eat your popcorn and if you're still bored, maybe you could count your popcorn because right now, I'm watching - and listening to - a movie. Rant over. Apologies. Pet peeve.
Stairs are for ascending and descending. Move out of the way when you are done using them. Standing in front of them and looking around like a lost tourist is not one of their functions.
While stationary stairs have a lesser effect, I need a fraction of a second after getting off escalators because I have an inner ear thing that affects my balance on moving stairways. I try not to use them, but sometimes there are no alternatives. So maybe consider that no one (including you) needs to get everywhere at 100mph. If you are in that much of a rush, perhaps your time management skills need working on, rather than getting angry at the dizzy woman not moving in a NY second at the end of the stairs.
You only take two slices of pizza max, until everyone has had their fill.
Try your best to make sure there isn't a third wheel in your group. It really sucks to be in that position.
I'd rather be a third wheel (I'm quite happy in my singleness) than be forced to be set up. If I am going out with a group, I'm there because I like the people in the group, I don't need you to add an extra for me.
Don’t take the last of something without asking. Had gooey butter cookies I brought home when visiting family. I know they’re impossible to stop eating, so I guess it’s my fault. Offered roommates some when I left, came back and they were all gone. Never even got one :(
Or shout out, “who here is eyeing that last cookie and really wants it?” lift up the tray and pass it their way. Done!
Pointing out awkward situations. If it wasnt awkward before, it now definitely is.
You don't need to be this close when you're talking to me.
Don’t ask trans people about their bodies, or what surgeries they’ve had/plan to have.
Not just trans people. *Any* people. If people want to rearrange their face and/or body then that's *their* business and not mine or yours.
Load More Replies...Not walking into people you clearly see in front of you. I can't count how many times I stop for someone coming forward they just barrel on towards me with a f**k-you grin. You stop, do a little side step shimmy with each to agree on a direction to go around each other.
Yep. Why am I ALWAYS THE ONE to move out of everyone else's way???!! Aaarrrggh!
Load More Replies...Cell phones with loud games or videos blaring on them ARE NOT CHILD PACIFIERS IN RESTAURANTS!!!
If your kids are very young you should think about not bringing them to a restaurant at all.
Load More Replies...When you live in an apartment building, remember you have neighbors and don't blast your music all day and night, don't let your kids just run all around it screaming, and don't just let your pets out to roam and poop everywhere.
What if my pets play loud music and my kids poop everywhere? ;-)
Load More Replies...If I'm engrossed in my book, it isn't time for talking to me unless it is really, really important.
People at theaters or church who arrive early and take the seat on the aisle. Then they give an ugly look to everybody that must make them move to get to the remaining seats.
Ok, I would want to add one : If a guest brings an expensive gift, don't ask them to pay for food the few days they stay at your place ! (or maybe warn them before, if you are on a budget and need stuff? I always ask "what do you want me to bring?" just to be sure.) Long story short : friend invites me at her parents place, I bring an expensive box of chocolate for them (pieces of art and delicious, they were pleased). And I'm the kind of guest to offer my help for any chore, mom is pleased. Next morning, mom says "you girls go groceries shopping and cook dinner" (we are 25 - 30). Parents are definitely not on a budget (but I am). Definitely not the way I was educated. My friend is also a bit embarrassed. And I still don't get the mom's point. 🤷♀️
Walking in a parking lot, walk a straight line to the store; not amble diagonally across and hold up traffic.
Waiting for pedestrians to cross when they're more then a meter from the cross walk, JUST GO. When I'm at the curb and looking into traffic, THEN wait (this is America folks and peds 1st is the rule). Waving for me to walk across or go 1st at 4 way stops, NOPE, that is a ticket for me AND you - as you're not an officer and you're directing traffic and I am following your direction. I will nope until you're mad, it is illegal. Please for the love of God, teach your kids to be confident when crossing the street - look into the eyes of the drivers and assess their attention, be sure they see you, and when you cross don't hesitate half way across and scurry back nor fail to observe traffic and do a mad dash.
That uber-politeness drives me nuts! Many times when I've been in a left turn lane on a bike, an oncoming driver STOPS and WAITS for me to turn in front of them. NO! Just GO! Otherwise the person behind them might assume they're turning right or just an idiot stopping for no reason, so they'll use the turn lane to zip around them and there I am on my bike. Just follow the rules of the road folks!
Load More Replies...There are millions of rules... Drive fast in fast lane. Let the other finish their statement. Put it back, the glass, the dumb bell, the stationary item, etc. Yes you should greet with your friend, but in the middle of a busy footpath. He can hear you, just try to talk in low voice on your mobile phone. You are stinking, how the hell the time will pass all the way along .
Don’t ask trans people about their bodies, or what surgeries they’ve had/plan to have.
Not just trans people. *Any* people. If people want to rearrange their face and/or body then that's *their* business and not mine or yours.
Load More Replies...Not walking into people you clearly see in front of you. I can't count how many times I stop for someone coming forward they just barrel on towards me with a f**k-you grin. You stop, do a little side step shimmy with each to agree on a direction to go around each other.
Yep. Why am I ALWAYS THE ONE to move out of everyone else's way???!! Aaarrrggh!
Load More Replies...Cell phones with loud games or videos blaring on them ARE NOT CHILD PACIFIERS IN RESTAURANTS!!!
If your kids are very young you should think about not bringing them to a restaurant at all.
Load More Replies...When you live in an apartment building, remember you have neighbors and don't blast your music all day and night, don't let your kids just run all around it screaming, and don't just let your pets out to roam and poop everywhere.
What if my pets play loud music and my kids poop everywhere? ;-)
Load More Replies...If I'm engrossed in my book, it isn't time for talking to me unless it is really, really important.
People at theaters or church who arrive early and take the seat on the aisle. Then they give an ugly look to everybody that must make them move to get to the remaining seats.
Ok, I would want to add one : If a guest brings an expensive gift, don't ask them to pay for food the few days they stay at your place ! (or maybe warn them before, if you are on a budget and need stuff? I always ask "what do you want me to bring?" just to be sure.) Long story short : friend invites me at her parents place, I bring an expensive box of chocolate for them (pieces of art and delicious, they were pleased). And I'm the kind of guest to offer my help for any chore, mom is pleased. Next morning, mom says "you girls go groceries shopping and cook dinner" (we are 25 - 30). Parents are definitely not on a budget (but I am). Definitely not the way I was educated. My friend is also a bit embarrassed. And I still don't get the mom's point. 🤷♀️
Walking in a parking lot, walk a straight line to the store; not amble diagonally across and hold up traffic.
Waiting for pedestrians to cross when they're more then a meter from the cross walk, JUST GO. When I'm at the curb and looking into traffic, THEN wait (this is America folks and peds 1st is the rule). Waving for me to walk across or go 1st at 4 way stops, NOPE, that is a ticket for me AND you - as you're not an officer and you're directing traffic and I am following your direction. I will nope until you're mad, it is illegal. Please for the love of God, teach your kids to be confident when crossing the street - look into the eyes of the drivers and assess their attention, be sure they see you, and when you cross don't hesitate half way across and scurry back nor fail to observe traffic and do a mad dash.
That uber-politeness drives me nuts! Many times when I've been in a left turn lane on a bike, an oncoming driver STOPS and WAITS for me to turn in front of them. NO! Just GO! Otherwise the person behind them might assume they're turning right or just an idiot stopping for no reason, so they'll use the turn lane to zip around them and there I am on my bike. Just follow the rules of the road folks!
Load More Replies...There are millions of rules... Drive fast in fast lane. Let the other finish their statement. Put it back, the glass, the dumb bell, the stationary item, etc. Yes you should greet with your friend, but in the middle of a busy footpath. He can hear you, just try to talk in low voice on your mobile phone. You are stinking, how the hell the time will pass all the way along .