50 Times People Dropped A Sentence That Probably No One Has Ever Thought Of Before, As Shared In This Group
People talk so much every day, you'd think we'd run out of things to say. But we're as good with words as the weather is with ruining a perfectly fine day. Just take a look at the subreddit r/BrandNewSentence, for example. From the divorce rate among socks to the crotch fruit we make our employees, its members collect sentences they think have never been written before, and their collection is pretty impressive. Continue scrolling and take a look at some of the subreddit's top posts.
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Name That Death Megatron 300
We’ll Keep Ye Plump As A Partridge
My metabolism is confused about the weather. It is convinced that winter is coming, and I must be prepared with internal fuel.
As soon as we put originality and language in the same equation, I can't help but think about the infinite monkey theorem. It states that a monkey hitting keys at random on a typewriter keyboard for an infinite amount of time will almost certainly type any given text, such as the complete works of William Shakespeare.
In fact, we can make it even more extreme: the monkey would almost surely type every possible finite text an infinite number of times. But the probability that monkeys filling the entire observable universe would type a single complete work, such as Shakespeare's Hamlet, is so tiny that the chance of it occurring during a period of time hundreds of thousands of orders of magnitude longer than the age of the universe is extremely low. Technically, however, it is not zero.
Griefcase
I Do Not Vibe With This Soil
I planted seeds in a flower bed... They did not grow, except I the alley.
Soak It In Olive Oil
r/BrandNewSentence has a lot of sentences that strike the perfect balance between poetry and logic. In other words, they're vivid and they make sense. They're memorable. Like a good slogan. Or a song chorus that gets stuck in your head. But personally, I think the best brand new sentence came even before the Internet.
"For sale: baby shoes, never worn." The story goes that this particular quote is a testament to Ernest Hemingway's extraordinary talent. Allegedly, these six words were a result of a $10 bet among Hemingway and several writers at a lunch spiced with wordplay
He’s My Biological Dog
Brad And His Cloud Of Lies
Marked Slices Of Tree
I definitely don't 'hallucinate' when I read. I love reading but have little to no visual imagination. I just love language and the associations the right combination of words can create, and when I read, I'm super focused on the use of language and the cadence of the writing. I will on occasion reread a section multiple times just because it was written so ridiculously well it makes me giddy.
People say Hemingway asked each of his colleagues to place a $10 wager, and in return, he would match it. His task was to create this shortest of stories.
The only problem is, Hemingway may have never written it. Or if he did, the story wasn't entirely his invention. Similar "ads" have been recorded years earlier. But no matter who came up with it, I believe this piece of flash fiction would get a lot of upvotes on r/BrandNewSentence.
No No, He's Got A Point
Is America The Rest Of The World's Florida?
Lesbians To The Rescue
We Drove Out The Lubrication
How Else Would You Name Dinosaurs?
Happens To The Best Of Us
Illegal Underground Grandma Karaoke Bars
“I Was So Insulted I Woke Up”
Those Are The Holes Poked In The Container So We Can Breathe
A Brain The Size Of A Chocolate Chip
Spare Me The Itch Juice, Thank You
The itch juice is their saliva 💦💦 your body's immune system reacts to it with histamine making the area itch. They actually need to spit in the hole they made because their saliva works as an anticoagulant, meaning that your blood doesn't immediately clot and repair the hole, so they can drink until they're full.
The Future Is Meaningless But The Pasta Is Now
I hate to be the "smartass": But this is how our mind actually works. It is really interesting, and there is scientific proof. Some of you might have read "the chimp paradox" by Prof. Steve Peters. There you will find the details about it.
“Festering...”
I Am Chorizo
Be The Inexplicable Phenomena You Wish To See In The World
Floppy Discs
Never mind the computers, how about the printers that were so noisy they had their own room. Bit like my brother really
World Changer
“Gays Are Using Windmills To Waft Homosexual Mists Into Your Home”
Crotch Fruit Employees
Have We Checked All Food To See If Exploding Them Makes Them Into Something Better, Or Did We Just Stop With Corn?
“Are Millennials Killing The Serial Killer Industry?”
Stay Fresh Cheese Bags!
Classic Jesus Or Republican Jesus?
Well, Classic Jesus might mean Crusades and Witch Hunts, so maybe add Actual Jesus to the mix. Actual Jesus is way more peace-loving, flexible, and tolerant of differences than either of the other two.
That's classic Jesus. Spain Jesus is what you're thinking classic Jesus is.
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Christians are people who don't follow Jesus teachings but think they deserve to go to heaven because they read the fanfic...
I am not sure what kind of christians you have encountered but those people you mentioned are not christians. The whole concept of Christianity is that everyone is a sinner and does not deserve a place in heaven without the blood of Jesus Christ. So, by definition, a person who thinks that they deserve to go to heaven, can't possibly be a christian. A place in heaven is impossible to be earned by anyone.
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Jesus was not a Republican. Neither a Democrat. He was the king of Jews (and basically of the entire world), so He was a Monarchist. Conclusion : long live the queen.
Republican Jesus is a WASP, encourages people to stone the prostitute, and charges a copay for healing.
Most Christians can't tell you 6 verifiable things the Bible says. God (?) made ALL people, not just those who believe in the Christian texts. A person doesn't have a say in where, to whom, under what religious or political doctrine he/she was raised. I wish we could abolish the concept of religion!
We don't discuss religion anymore and still we are both Christians. I just cannot take some things seriously because of the abstract thinking and we decided in the end that we would have to agee to disagree. And politics neither because of the same reason. No one is changing their mind to just please the other one and besides from these 2 topics we think almost identical about everything and almost never have a fight
Oh! I so be lick'n this one "Classical or republican Jesus (God)".. Heck I'm gonna do me little dance of joy.
there does seem to be a massive difference since the Republican Jesus is definitely a brain-washed Nazi white supremacist vs the 'be kind to your neighbors' kind of Jesus.
Republican Jesus by Tony Keddie is a genius book! In it, I learned that Republican Jesus, was a white, working class, carpenter — a Christian man whose family legally immigrated... A must-read...
Ok so you have the power to judge people by determining which is the proper type of Christian is the correct type of Christian and you base your judgment on what? How you feel, what you read, a moral authority you've read about and agree with? And this classic Jesus, is he classic in what sense? Classic in the sense of just a dude who walked the earth and was wise like some religions think or classic in that he was the Son of God who came to save mankind and die for your sins? That kind of classic. When it comes to Jesus don't just throw out glib statements. He died for us!!!!!
There's no such thing as a "right opinion", FYI
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It's the difference between "Christian" and "Bible Thumper who hates gays"
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Expensive Potato That Barks At The Wind
Cotton Eye Joe Has Been Terminated
Two Mini Hellpanthers
The Eyebrow Spectrum
Smoked Myself Back To Segregation
Thought you had some powerful, time machine weed. Oh, would that there was such magic in the world. But I dream.
Julius In The Coolius
You Are One Of My Sims
Wiggles Concert
why not take your progeny to italy? they only like spaghetti anyway
Whatever Works
Funniest Sh*t I've Seen All Week
Anon Knows The English Language
Cyberbullied And Entire Studio
LEGO Ass Of A Fictional Bipedal Animal
Cool Sport Rush
Reminds me of the lady from a few months ago that didn't want to smell like lavender, and instead wanted to smell like Eagle Claw Mountain or something
One Nice Way To Feel Better About Yourself Is To Imagine What Steve Irwin Would Say About You If You Were A Little Snake He Found In The Desert
Dress For The Jockey You Want, Not The Jockey You Have
I have the vision of an old fashioned british cottage, where there is a house with a polished brass sign saying "HORSE TAYLOR"
Life Pro Tip
PFWHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PFWHEEEEEEEE PFWHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PFWHEEEEEEEEEEEEE PFWHEEEEEE PFWHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PFWHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Life Is A Tornado And I’m Just A Cow Being Spun Around For Cinematic Value
Snarrot
Note: this post originally had 137 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
"So Thor is the bastard lovechild of Professor McGonagall and France?" Yes, I actually said that once. No, I will not tell you the context.
This literally made my night I was laughing way too hard at some lol
Why do they call people who report on the weather meteorologists when they are reporting on the climate, shouldn’t they be climatologist? And Meteorologists should study and report on meteors? No, really.
Podologists don't study poodles, but orthodontists ARE awful dentists, so perhaps this phoneticism has potential.
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Back in the late 90's and early aughts everyone was buying desktops computers, but to get on the internet it had to go through your phone line and it was long and unreliable. Many people just used their computer to play solitaire. It was a $2,000 dollar deck of cards. People also used to wear wrist watches, they were modern and a quick reliable way to tell time. Now if you ask someone for the time, they reach in their pocket and pull out their cell phone. So we are now to the time before wrist watches and back to pocket watches.
My wife kept sticking her head around the door, saying, "What are you laughing at now?"
I just learned something: if you suck in an empty yogurt tube in the correct way with a gap between your two front teeth it makes cool sounds that kinda sound like if rewinding a tv show had sounds that went the same speed as the rewind.
Where are the rest of the images? Just separate them into multiple posts if need be.
@ 115: Pee & poop toilets sounds good, but hey sometimes you go to pee and when you sit down your bunghole says, "Well while you're here..."
"So Thor is the bastard lovechild of Professor McGonagall and France?" Yes, I actually said that once. No, I will not tell you the context.
This literally made my night I was laughing way too hard at some lol
Why do they call people who report on the weather meteorologists when they are reporting on the climate, shouldn’t they be climatologist? And Meteorologists should study and report on meteors? No, really.
Podologists don't study poodles, but orthodontists ARE awful dentists, so perhaps this phoneticism has potential.
Load More Replies... Back in the late 90's and early aughts everyone was buying desktops computers, but to get on the internet it had to go through your phone line and it was long and unreliable. Many people just used their computer to play solitaire. It was a $2,000 dollar deck of cards. People also used to wear wrist watches, they were modern and a quick reliable way to tell time. Now if you ask someone for the time, they reach in their pocket and pull out their cell phone. So we are now to the time before wrist watches and back to pocket watches.
My wife kept sticking her head around the door, saying, "What are you laughing at now?"
I just learned something: if you suck in an empty yogurt tube in the correct way with a gap between your two front teeth it makes cool sounds that kinda sound like if rewinding a tv show had sounds that went the same speed as the rewind.
Where are the rest of the images? Just separate them into multiple posts if need be.
@ 115: Pee & poop toilets sounds good, but hey sometimes you go to pee and when you sit down your bunghole says, "Well while you're here..."
