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Woman Online Wonders If She’s A Jerk For Locking Her Expensive Toiletries Away From Her Boyfriend
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Woman Online Wonders If She’s A Jerk For Locking Her Expensive Toiletries Away From Her Boyfriend

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Nobody likes a mooch. And it’s not just the relentless asking. Remember when Jimmy asked for a pencil that one time in school and you got it back all chewed up? That’s why we can’t have nice things. Gross.

A Redditor recently went to the AITA, or Am I The A-Hole, community to ask if she was wrong to go against a mooch in seemingly drastic, yet at that point very logical ways. Her boyfriend would not stop using her beauty products, namely things for skincare and other toiletries, despite being confronted about it. This led to her buying a safe for it.

The mooch, needless to say, was anything but happy about it.

More Info: Reddit

You know things are getting serious if you need to buy a safe for your beauty products. No, not a burglar—just a moocher

Image source: Agronauti Cosmetics (not the actual photo)

So, 21-year-old Reddit user u/pinkybinderz has been having problems with her boyfriend of 2 years. You see, for the longest time, she has been earning more than him, so she would naturally pick up the slack in some regards. He’s a gym-goer, so he’s also in the habit of handling toiletries and bathroom rituals. This means she would buy certain products for him.

As for herself, she has a skin condition. One that, if left untended, might flare up and cause some serious health problems. Some of the products she uses, she uses for this particular condition, so, needless to say, it’s vital.

A woman recently went to the AITA community to ask if she’s wrong for making her toiletries inaccessible to her boyfriend by means of a safe

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Image source: pinkybinderz

Well, she switched jobs. And that meant that money was tighter than usual. This also meant no more riding the freebie toiletry train as it had just arrived at its destination and wasn’t going anywhere else anytime soon. He was now expected to buy his own.

OP thought she had reached an agreement on this topic, but started noticing she was running out of products faster than usual. She broached the topic with him several more times. Figured that should be enough to get the point across.

Nope.

You see, talking didn’t work—he would continue to use her $220 face wash and the like—so she had to take it to the next level

Woman Online Wonders If She’s A Jerk For Locking Her Expensive Toiletries Away From Her Boyfriend

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Image source: pinkybinderz

The last straw was her $220 face wash, which was supposed to be used sparingly. In theory, it should have lasted her 6 months. It was to be used to manage her eczema, a condition in which patches of skin become inflamed, itchy, cracked, rough, or can even blister in some cases. In fact, it’s a prescription. And if she runs out, bad things can happen to good people.

Well, after having not used it in a while, she found out it was empty. And when the boyfriend was confronted about it, his reaction was laughter and a refusal to replace it, especially after hearing the price. So, OP took inventory and deduced that she was out $800 in 3 months product-wise, all pointing at the boyfriend.

Since talking didn’t work, the next best thing was for her to buy a safe. But as one commenter put it accurately: “if you’re at the ‘buy a safe because I can’t trust him to not use my stuff’ stage, just break up.” How’s that for subtle foreshadowing?

All in all, the boyfriend managed to use up $800 worth of beauty products in 3 months, and you can get why the safe upset him dearly

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Image source: pinkybinderz

Image source: Ron Lach (not the actual photo)

As you might have guessed, once the boyfriend found out, he lost it. He thought she was over-reacting and that she didn’t trust him. What is more, their mutual friends seemed to be on his side. But none of them really understood that she had been hospitalized because of a huge flare-up after running out of product.

OP provided some updates once the post on Reddit went viral. In them, she explained that she had decided to break up with him as there was another last straw—he had been taking her steroids, ones she was prescribed, hoping they would make him buff for the gym. Meanwhile, she had to find insecurities, flare-ups, and other unnecessary stress that could have been avoided if only he had not done what he did.

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As of now, OP’s staying with a friend. She gave him a week to move out. She concluded with a thank you to the community for helping her make this decision.

Folks online were having none of it, though, as they were all for her dumping him, which she eventually did

And speaking of the community, folks on AITA ruled that she was not at fault here. While the whole safe thing did feel extreme, it was justified given the context. A context of disrespect and abuse, one that is deserving of a breakup.

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Nearly everyone was suggesting a breakup, which led to one. Folks did a very good job validating OP, explaining to her everything that is wrong about the situation: her mistrust is due to him not doing anything that would make him trustworthy; he’s literally stealing; he’s ignoring her pleas as someone who’s supposed to be a significant other; and the like.

As of this article, the post has 18,500 upvotes, a handful of Reddit awards, and over 2,000 comments discussing the matter. You can read the entire post and folks’ comments in context here. Or you could stay here and tell us your thoughts on who’s right or wrong in the comment section below!

Or, if that’s not what you came here for, then you can continue your internet journey to one of these AITA articles by Bored Panda here, here, here, or here.

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zselyke_szekely avatar
UpupaEpops
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All things aside, I just love how this moron sees the word "steroid" and thinks he's gonna look like a bodybuilder from them. My man. When I had to take 'roids during an especially nasty IBD flare-up, I piled on the weight, my skin was so thin it literally bled every time I bumped into something, I was chuck full of bruises, could barely sleep, was constantly bloated and could have filled a pool with my sweat. At no point during these God-awful 8 months have I looked like She-Hulk.

helenwaight avatar
Helen Waight
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh man, yeah. The ones I took for my illnesses turned my skin to tissue paper. Never had so many cuts and bruises in my life. They’re like any strong medication: bad side effects. Not for fun.

Load More Replies...
deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As someone with eczema, this really aggravated me. Skincare products are very expensive and we have to make sure that we always have them available. A flare up can be annoying, irritating, and painful and not having your products because of some moron can really affect your stress and make the flare up worse.

avantikacholleti avatar
Pumpkin Spice
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't even have eczema but it still made me mad. Imagine someone taking my Adderall to get high. Imagine someone taking my special hair products, or my foundation (I need to use a certain foundation because most make me get hives). If I had something like ECZEMA, which REQUIRES medication and special products, I WOULD BURY THIS MAN ALIVE, HE DOES NOT DESERVE TO LIVE.

Load More Replies...
jensfjennfogcity avatar
Jen “SFJenn” Fogcity
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He is not buying his own toiletries? Is he a child? He needs to be educated that as an adult he needs to have his own toiletries.

savannahyoung avatar
S
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

HE STOLE YOUR MEDICINE?! Who the f**k does that.

dizzied avatar
Dizzie D
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Someone like this will only escalate and continue to behave like this if she just stays with him. Taking her steroid medication is way more alarming than skincare as that shows that he cares absolutely nothing about her health and well being. What if she had antibiotics or strong painkillers and he just took those before her course runs out and she can't get anymore? I mean that could result in being admitted to hospital. That's what this guy is capable of. Definitely needs to dump him, swiftly.

ajones_1 avatar
A Jones
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There's a lot of red flags to warrant a termination of this relationship now before it gets worse.

moths avatar
rabbitsrabbit
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a leech. He isnt being lazy, not wanting to buy his own toiletries (OP bought him his own set even when she could barely afford her own) - he just wants to use the 'good stuff' knowing how much they are worth. He even took her meds when he would have first-hand knowledge how bad OP's skin condition can get. This is a grade A selfish prick.

jb_16 avatar
JB
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So, there I was reading about this d-canoe stealing prescription-grade skincare thinking “if he steals that he’d probably steal prescription drugs as well”. Lo and behold… Good riddance to bad rubbish.

willisantiago avatar
willi santiago
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not sure if these are real, but I'm damn tired of people wondering if they did something wrong in response to terrible behavior from a partner. The only thing she did wrong was not leave

danielyamada_1 avatar
Daniel Yamada
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a child, I heard my mother and her friend talking about toiletries and thought they meant "toilet trees". So I went for a walk in the woods behind our house to look for a toilet tree.

madmcqueen avatar
Mad McQueen
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Her health is as risk but hey let me pop some pills and use that medicated stuff anyway. Dumped. That's all. And send a bill to his parents in his name after he's out and locks are changed for the stuff he gobbled through. And hope he gets late life acne.

rchargel avatar
RafCo (he/him)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This story is sad. I feel bad for this woman who was so insecure, that she thought this child's behavior was acceptable. When I hear things like this, I just want to give these people a hug and let them know they deserve to be loved. If she loses some friends over this, then her friends are not worth keeping. Life is WAY too short to waste it.

simon_37 avatar
The IRS
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Does this mean this $220 face wash should be on prescription but they don't have insurance? I can't figure this out.

maxwatson1991 avatar
Max
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would not leave a guy like that alone in my house. He'd probably trash the place.

mireetta avatar
Remi (He/Him)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If the boyfriend thinks he needs skincare for skin disease, then he should get his own effin diagnosis. Wasting hundreds of dollars worth of product just because is something a four year old might do. The attempt to make the op somehow responsible for him using them and evil for protection of her health care products is gaslight level extreme. With people like this you're always going to be bad and wrong. Just remember that it's a lie and you taking care of your health is... healthy.

libby6 avatar
Stargazer66
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When you get to the point that you have to buy a safe to lock up your **it to keep your boyfriend from getting into AFTER you have explained that you'll end up in the hospital if you run out, it is time to toss his **it out the door and ask the landlord to take him off the lease and change the locks.

nicoleherron_1 avatar
Nicole Herron
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is the a*****e for buying overly expensive stuff she doesn't need. They make offbrands

dawnmurph avatar
Dawn Murphy
Community Member
1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Why is this even out there for others to see? Nothing more than an attention getter....

scotttbrynildsen avatar
Scott T Brynildsen
Community Member
1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

She's the a*****e for treating him like a child. Don't prescriptions have an expiration date? So why did it take her so damn long to figure out the bottles were empty? What's she locking in the safe if she apparently can't afford them anymore? How can she afford a safe? Why does she think it's her responsibility to buy him skin care products but clearly not ask him what he actually wants, which is apparently not the c**p she's been buying him? Many guys won't go somewhere to learn about skin care because they don't know where to go and it can be embarrassing for them. She needs to stop acting put out by it or move on, because her victim mentality is a bunch of b******t.

jihana avatar
Jihana
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe she's treating him like a child because he's acting like one? Someone who is incapable of buying his own damn stuff is not an adult but a helpless child. The boyfriend is selfish, immature and does not have any respect for her whatsoever. He uses up her stuff to p**s her of and the refuses to buy new bottles once he learned how expensive it is - but apparently continues to use it. And who the F continues to steal medicine because getting buff is more important than someone not being in severe pain?

Load More Replies...
zselyke_szekely avatar
UpupaEpops
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All things aside, I just love how this moron sees the word "steroid" and thinks he's gonna look like a bodybuilder from them. My man. When I had to take 'roids during an especially nasty IBD flare-up, I piled on the weight, my skin was so thin it literally bled every time I bumped into something, I was chuck full of bruises, could barely sleep, was constantly bloated and could have filled a pool with my sweat. At no point during these God-awful 8 months have I looked like She-Hulk.

helenwaight avatar
Helen Waight
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh man, yeah. The ones I took for my illnesses turned my skin to tissue paper. Never had so many cuts and bruises in my life. They’re like any strong medication: bad side effects. Not for fun.

Load More Replies...
deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As someone with eczema, this really aggravated me. Skincare products are very expensive and we have to make sure that we always have them available. A flare up can be annoying, irritating, and painful and not having your products because of some moron can really affect your stress and make the flare up worse.

avantikacholleti avatar
Pumpkin Spice
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't even have eczema but it still made me mad. Imagine someone taking my Adderall to get high. Imagine someone taking my special hair products, or my foundation (I need to use a certain foundation because most make me get hives). If I had something like ECZEMA, which REQUIRES medication and special products, I WOULD BURY THIS MAN ALIVE, HE DOES NOT DESERVE TO LIVE.

Load More Replies...
jensfjennfogcity avatar
Jen “SFJenn” Fogcity
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He is not buying his own toiletries? Is he a child? He needs to be educated that as an adult he needs to have his own toiletries.

savannahyoung avatar
S
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

HE STOLE YOUR MEDICINE?! Who the f**k does that.

dizzied avatar
Dizzie D
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Someone like this will only escalate and continue to behave like this if she just stays with him. Taking her steroid medication is way more alarming than skincare as that shows that he cares absolutely nothing about her health and well being. What if she had antibiotics or strong painkillers and he just took those before her course runs out and she can't get anymore? I mean that could result in being admitted to hospital. That's what this guy is capable of. Definitely needs to dump him, swiftly.

ajones_1 avatar
A Jones
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There's a lot of red flags to warrant a termination of this relationship now before it gets worse.

moths avatar
rabbitsrabbit
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a leech. He isnt being lazy, not wanting to buy his own toiletries (OP bought him his own set even when she could barely afford her own) - he just wants to use the 'good stuff' knowing how much they are worth. He even took her meds when he would have first-hand knowledge how bad OP's skin condition can get. This is a grade A selfish prick.

jb_16 avatar
JB
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So, there I was reading about this d-canoe stealing prescription-grade skincare thinking “if he steals that he’d probably steal prescription drugs as well”. Lo and behold… Good riddance to bad rubbish.

willisantiago avatar
willi santiago
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not sure if these are real, but I'm damn tired of people wondering if they did something wrong in response to terrible behavior from a partner. The only thing she did wrong was not leave

danielyamada_1 avatar
Daniel Yamada
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a child, I heard my mother and her friend talking about toiletries and thought they meant "toilet trees". So I went for a walk in the woods behind our house to look for a toilet tree.

madmcqueen avatar
Mad McQueen
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Her health is as risk but hey let me pop some pills and use that medicated stuff anyway. Dumped. That's all. And send a bill to his parents in his name after he's out and locks are changed for the stuff he gobbled through. And hope he gets late life acne.

rchargel avatar
RafCo (he/him)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This story is sad. I feel bad for this woman who was so insecure, that she thought this child's behavior was acceptable. When I hear things like this, I just want to give these people a hug and let them know they deserve to be loved. If she loses some friends over this, then her friends are not worth keeping. Life is WAY too short to waste it.

simon_37 avatar
The IRS
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Does this mean this $220 face wash should be on prescription but they don't have insurance? I can't figure this out.

maxwatson1991 avatar
Max
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would not leave a guy like that alone in my house. He'd probably trash the place.

mireetta avatar
Remi (He/Him)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If the boyfriend thinks he needs skincare for skin disease, then he should get his own effin diagnosis. Wasting hundreds of dollars worth of product just because is something a four year old might do. The attempt to make the op somehow responsible for him using them and evil for protection of her health care products is gaslight level extreme. With people like this you're always going to be bad and wrong. Just remember that it's a lie and you taking care of your health is... healthy.

libby6 avatar
Stargazer66
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When you get to the point that you have to buy a safe to lock up your **it to keep your boyfriend from getting into AFTER you have explained that you'll end up in the hospital if you run out, it is time to toss his **it out the door and ask the landlord to take him off the lease and change the locks.

nicoleherron_1 avatar
Nicole Herron
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is the a*****e for buying overly expensive stuff she doesn't need. They make offbrands

dawnmurph avatar
Dawn Murphy
Community Member
1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Why is this even out there for others to see? Nothing more than an attention getter....

scotttbrynildsen avatar
Scott T Brynildsen
Community Member
1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

She's the a*****e for treating him like a child. Don't prescriptions have an expiration date? So why did it take her so damn long to figure out the bottles were empty? What's she locking in the safe if she apparently can't afford them anymore? How can she afford a safe? Why does she think it's her responsibility to buy him skin care products but clearly not ask him what he actually wants, which is apparently not the c**p she's been buying him? Many guys won't go somewhere to learn about skin care because they don't know where to go and it can be embarrassing for them. She needs to stop acting put out by it or move on, because her victim mentality is a bunch of b******t.

jihana avatar
Jihana
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe she's treating him like a child because he's acting like one? Someone who is incapable of buying his own damn stuff is not an adult but a helpless child. The boyfriend is selfish, immature and does not have any respect for her whatsoever. He uses up her stuff to p**s her of and the refuses to buy new bottles once he learned how expensive it is - but apparently continues to use it. And who the F continues to steal medicine because getting buff is more important than someone not being in severe pain?

Load More Replies...
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