At customs in LAX:
Customs Agent: “Where are you from?”
CA:“Sir, please don’t lie about your nationality”
Me: “Excuse me?”
CA: “Denmark isn’t a real country, now please tell me your country of origin.”
Me: “Sir, you are literally holding my passport, which is from Denmark, in your hand. How can you sit there and tell me that my country doesn’t exist?!”
CA: “Sir, Denmark is a region of Sweden, and not a recognised independent nation”
The swedes would be fond of this encounter.
Asking how much I copay for insurance. I don't even know what copay means.
I live in NZ and worked in retail, so there's been a few.
Funniest was "You have to serve me!" after they made a racial remark (wasn't too bad, but still f****n rude), threw a tantrum in the store because they didn't look at the prices before they used one of our products, then started trashing the place.
When my manager told them no I certainly did not have to serve them (by law) and she was calling the cops for destruction of property the lady made an O face then took off without paying. Cops got her like an hour later. I just wish I was still at work when they brought her in to pay for all the stuff she broke/stole/used.
"How can Canadians offer free healthcare? Why would any doctors want to work for free? This is slavery!"
you can't be from country that doesn't speak English, you are white!!
I’m Australian and in 2015 I was doing a cruise around New Zealand with my family. Might add that I have an Autistic daughter who was 14 at the time and despite being Autistic is incredibly sociable, but has a tendency to strike up unusual conversations with strangers. We needed to get to one of the restaurants a few floors above us and decided to use the lift instead of the stairs. The lift arrived on our floor and we entered with an elderly couple already inside. My wife and I greeted them and they duly greeted us back and we soon ascertained they were American. Seconds later, my Autistic daughter stated the obvious that we were all travelling in a “lift”. A random throw-away comment, but that’s just who she is. The female literally barked at my daughter and told her the correct word was in fact an “elevator”. At this point I interjected and politely mentioned that where we are from it’s called a “lift”, but this couple were adamant that it was an “elevator”. Their attitude was we were wrong and they were right. Fortunately we never did get to see them the remainder of the cruise. We share a common language being English and there are going to be differences how we say things depending where we’ve been brought up - it’s about being open minded and accepting. Unfortunately it appeared that the world revolved around this couple.
"Ya'll are part of the USA, you just have a different flag 'sall."
Umm... no. I assure you Canada us not part of the US.
"Speak english this is america!" It was online, but yeah. The sheer stupidity struck me hard.
A friend was dating an American, and a bunch of us went out for a pub meal (UK).
Now, there's a stereotype that Americans can be a little loud. And, unfortunately, this was the case with this girl. Literally everyone in the pub was giving her side-eye, but noone says anything because that would be rude.
My friend very subtly tries to make her aware of the noise level, and she talk-yells, "oh no, honey. I'm not loud. All y'all are just too quiet! Such a quaint little country, y'all need to use your outdoor voices!"
We were quite clearly inside...
I once spoke to an American that was surprised that black Australian individuals had an Australian accent.
It's so weird but you can also see it coming somehow in how they often think about race: the same thing that one was surprised that black Dutch individuals of course had Dutch names.
My wife was staying at a hostel in Athens a few years ago. She shared a room with an American in her 20s. They got talking about where they’ve stayed in the past, and my wife told her that she used to live in Sweden for a few years. The American didn’t know where or what Sweden was. My wife said “It’s a country, next to Norway”. “Oh Norway!”, the American burst out, “Ole is from there! Do you know Ole?!”
Englishman, living in the US for 15 years now. I’ve been asked a lot of bizarre things but one of the best was someone who asked what language we speak in England, and how long it took me to learn English when I moved here.
A middle aged American was surprised to find out Venice was so old (and an actual city for centuries), and not built in the 20th century for tourist purposes
Had a taxi driver in New York ask how we got there (from Ireland). When we said by plane, he was like „you have airports?!“.
Also thought we were still getting round on horses.
As a Brit, I had to bite my tongue when asked 'Do you celebrate Independence Day?'
"Are your parents Democrats or Republicans?"
eh, have different political parties here luv
I once had an american tell me I need to try the “real” Gouda cheese they have in the US because everything else was fake Gouda… I’m Dutch and actually lived near Gouda
I swear on my mothers life that this happened:
I was on a student exchange between my German school and a school in San Francisco in the late 90s.
When the Americans came to visit us, we had a welcome party for them at a friends place. That friend had a dog, and at some point he gave the dog a command in German. The dog obeyed, and one of the American kids asks how we managed to teach German to the dog.
He wasn’t joking either, he seemed convinced that all pets are somehow born with knowledge of the English language, but all other languages need to be taught to them.
I met an American tourist who was adamant that my country [Iceland] was a home ruled territory under the US government.
He said this during our nations independence day.
He assumed we shared a similar status with Puerto Rico.
He was convinced of the error of his ways after confronting two other natives and a Google search.
An Austrian friend and I were told about about this magical thing they have in America called Fireworks and how we should go see it at least once in our lives.
“Wait, y’all have IKEA?”
When an American asked me what it's like to have an accent. They thought that they had no accent and their voice was 'default' basically
I’m British, was travelling in the states. Got talking to a guy at a bar while we’re waiting for service, and he recommended I try a pint of Guinness while in the US. He informed me they don’t sell Guinness in the UK.
I politely explained that they do indeed have Guinness in just about every pub in the UK. He disagreed, adding that he’s never been himself but his son in law went to London on business and told him so. I explained I’d lived in the UK including London my whole life. He looked at me lost in thought for a few moments, and said: “They don’t have Guinness there,” and walked away.
I was asked if France is part of the United Kingdom. When I tried explaining him what the United Kingdom is, he told me England is no longer part of the UK because of Brexit.
Canadian here. I was 7 and in Florida telling my new also 7 year old friend about our money system. I told her we don't have dollar or two dollar bills they are coins and called a loonie and a toonie. She goes and asks her parents and they told her I was lying.
You guys must have pretty terrible girlfriends. My wife and I share most things we feel vulnerable about. I am not going out of my way to be emotional, but I'm not hiding it behind some shield either.
If you show your true colors to a partner and she breaks up with you, it wasn't meant to last anyway.
I don’t like opening up to anyone even today, after two years of anti depressants and six months of therapy. I can’t open up to my mom because she would end up using it against me, maybe immediately, maybe later. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mom. She’s been through a great deal and tried her level best to not let that [stuff] reach us ( my brother and I),but to err is human. My dad is what your typical Indian dad is, a stoic guy, not expressing himself( kind of like the meme of that dog sitting in a room on fire). Add to that his emotionally distant parents and him joining the army at 17 to become an officer and you have this absolutely thick exterior that doesn’t let anything through. I work as a doctor in Delhi. Everyone around is dying. Bright eyed juniors I knew, people I said goodbye to not knowing it would be the last opportunity I’d get, patients and their hapless families, grieving mothers/ fathers/ wives/ husbands/ parents/ children. None of them deserved it and I feel that somehow I’m to blame. I can’t just man up every time. Sorry I started this diatribe. Had to get it out somewhere.
For me, it was when I needed her to be the strong one. Got super stressed out from first deployment, expressed that I needed a day or two of my own time to chill out from my gf at the time due to her insatiable desire to either be horny or problematic or how she would constantly express her horniness and then dump a really tough conversation on me (she was very back and forth about wanting kids, huge topic for me). Like she’d butter me up and then mention her mother wants us to date for 7 years before marriage and that’s the only way it could happen like wHAT. So. During the time I needed to clear my head, I didn’t do anything that’d hurt her I just went to work and focused on me and coping. Turns out, she lost interest in me pretty much immediately and then left me the two days later once I felt okay again because I wasn’t good enough. It’s cool, I was fine all alone out there and I learned that I am not dating a manipulative wreck who uses relationships to feel better about themself and uses me as a therapist. I’m a grown ass man and sometimes if I’m really stressed I need space away from the stress and not more crying or problems or complicated shenanigans.
My mother passed when I was 15, cried my eyes out to my girlfriend at the time – she called me a little b**** and said she didn’t get why I was crying – behind my back to her group of friends, and my best friend, who told me. So I broke up with her, then she spread a bunch of rumors about me. Yep, Teenagers are [messed] up