When I hear the word ‘prankster’, my mind immediately thinks of The Mask and Bart Simpson. They might have hearts of gold, but they’re real jerks. However, it’s not just imaginary characters who like to make people’s lives difficult — there are plenty of jokester animals out there, too. Chief among them are birds. And they’re just waiting for the perfect moment to pounce and ruin your day. A pity they’re usually the only ones laughing at their horrible jokes.
If you ever thought that all the types of birds are sweet, innocent, and fluffy, well, we can tell you that the only animals in the world like that are pandas. No, no, we’re not biased. Not one bit. You have to believe us. [Hides panda flag].
To show you the hidden dark side that dwells within the hearts of all birbs out there, Bored Panda presents to you this list, freshly forged in the halls of our Editorial Department. Upvote the jerkiest pet birds, let us know in the comments which ones you think are the worst offenders, and warn your friends that birds are not as cute as they seem! While you’re on a roll, have a look through Bored Panda’s other fun lists about cats being jerks, funny animals that don’t care about rules, and bosses acting like the biggest jerks on the planet.
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Angry Cockatoo Tears Down Anti-Bird Spikes And Throws Them To The Ground
This Bird Waits For My Coworker To Show Up Every Morning. Then Spends The Day Looking At Itself In The Mirror And Shitting
Nice Paint Job. Be A Shame If Someone...
You might be willing to give our flying feathered friends a pass, but there’s plenty of evidence to suggest that birds can be real cretins. Just like some people. Sometimes worse. From aggressive behavior to unquenchable greed, one look at these funny birds will have you thinking its an apt representation of what human society would look like after the Apocalypse. And if birds are distant descendants of dinosaurs, I’d rather not think of the dastardly pranks that a T-Rex and his pals would pull if they were ever cloned!
I Don't Think This Bird Can Read
Classic
This Photo Of A Pelican Trying To Eat My Phone
It’s not just us who think birds are idiots. Scientists are on our side. Taki’s Magazine writes about the very worst flying egomaniacs who don’t care about anyone but themselves. Take hummingbirds as an example. The egoistically smart birds are so greedy, they claim bird feeders, and won’t let anyone else near them. Not even for a taste.
Just Try To Frigging Cage Me Again
[Screw] This Tree In Particular
![[Screw] This Tree In Particular](https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/birds-being-jerks-72-5d5fb4571ad61__700.jpg "[Screw] This Tree In Particular")
So.. Did The Bunny Grow Wings And Go To Heaven?
Now, are you ready for something spooky and chilling about crows? I warn you, you’ll never look at them the same again. Crows are, apparently, the living embodiments of gluttony. They eat everything. And I mean everything. From garbage to tiny, beautiful baby birbs. Crows have a special appetite for robins and bluebirds. I did warn you.
Taken One Second Before Disaster
This Goose Is Fery Angry
This Bird [friggin] Hates Spelling
![This Bird [friggin] Hates Spelling](https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/birds-being-jerks-28-5d5e4fcb75021__700.jpg "This Bird [friggin] Hates Spelling")
Oh, and if you thought that the majestic bald eagles are exempt from criticism, think again. They’re such jerks that even other birds think they’re jerks. Bald eagles are so inept at hunting, they usually steal other birds’ prey or eat carrion, like vultures. Yuck.
Bird Trying To Snack On The Family Pet
Sometimes When Billy Is With His Friends He Can Be A Bit Mischievous
This Happened
Not to mention some of the biggest meanies around — Canada geese and swans. Canada geese are legendary for their aggressive animal behavior and are known for how often they attack people. Though, according to USA Today, they only do so because people are expanding into their territory and getting too close to their eggs or newborn birbs. The same goes for swans: though they’re graceful and beautiful, they will stop at nothing to defend their kids if anyone gets near them.
If you ever see a hummingbird eyeing your ice-cream or a crow looking at you funny — drop everything and run. Hide. And lock the doors. Otherwise, you might be another victim of jerk birds.
The Australian Firehawks
Australian firehawks proactively spread wildfires. Observers report both solo and cooperative attempts, often successful, to spread wildfires intentionally via single-occasion or repeated transport of burning sticks in talons or beaks. After succesfully spreading the fire, the "firehawks" are able to pick out fleeing prey or mung on the charred remains of those critters who didn't make it out in time.
Who's Laughing Now Ass****?
"Is This Cake Batter?!" *dunks Entire Head In*
Yoink!
Basically A Summary Of What Its Like To Own A Bird
Keeps Pecking The Window And Shouting At Me While I'm Trying To Work. D**k
Payback To The Masters
This Hawk Has Approximately Zero F**ks To Give About The Bees
It Looks Better On The Floor, Karen
So This Dick Takes The Best Parking Spot Today
My great uncle Terry had a dairy farm when I was a kid. My mum took me to visit one time when I was 14 - and already six foot tall. She was sat at the kitchen table talking to her aunt while I went out exploring. I was warned about the Geestapo outside the farm house. But when I met the pissy Peacock I realised the Geese were easy to get around. Mum said all she could see was my head moving back and forth over the top of the hedge row outside. She didn't realise I was running from a very angry, seriously pissed off Peacock. I'll never forgotten that. It's funny in hind sight but at the time damn. I couldn't get my legs to move fast enough.
He can have it. First, he is absolutely beautiful. Second, peacocks can be incredibly nasty and should be given a wide berth.
So the bird is a peadick? Just doesn't have the style of the original name.
Was at the zoo with my kids, attempting to have a picnic lunch on the lawn. The Cincinnati zoo let the peacocks roam free in the zoo. A very aggressive, very beautiful peacock decided our lunch was his. Came running at us full speed and took the food right out of our hands! Zookeeper said NEXT time (yeah, he actually said that) flap your arms aggressively at the bird to show him who's boss. He showed us and it worked. But there won't be a "next time". My kids were terrified. Lol.
Peacocks are d***s too. Like they somehow bought into all the narcissistic qualities of being “beautiful and having glorious plumage”.
His Majesty has a sense of Entitlement.... Why not ? Because he has a magnificent tail !
Bird versus car...... I would drive in real slowly. Worst case you are down one jerk peacock.
There's a hospital in my city that has a lot of peacocks at. They are a friendly bunch and you are able to buy seeds from a shop inside the Hospital. Whenever I went there were chicks
We used to have a neighbor that owned a peacock, the first time after we moved into our house across the street. There was a horrific sound coming from her yard. We later found out the “HELP” “HELP” sound was a peacock in heat. Scared the holy c**p out my hubby, me and our two young kids.
That has to be Florida. They are everywhere and they scratch peoples cars and s**t on them
From The National Aquarium Of New Zealand
Sister Wanted To Pet Chicken, Chicken Disagreed
Mr. Steal Your Fries
Just A Nibble
Birds Being Jerks
Stretch Swan
Look At This Jerk
“Guess I’ll Nest On This [friggin] Coffee” - Pigeon
![“Guess I’ll Nest On This [friggin] Coffee” - Pigeon](https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/birds-being-jerks-66-5d5e673d67aef__700.jpg "“Guess I’ll Nest On This [friggin] Coffee” - Pigeon")
Birds Being Jerks
No Hooman You All Will Not Facetime Without Me!
This Adorable Little Asshole Eating My Sammich While Standing On The Goddamn Piece Of Bread I Gave Him
It Looks Like Dozens Of Birds Decided To Sh*t On One Car At My Work
Theft Bird
Yoink
My Friend Took This Down At The Beach The Other Day... Need I Say More?
The Cement Wasn’t Dry Yet..but Who Cares If You’re This Bird...
A Hawk Used My Car As A Dinner Plate This Morning
Duck Gives No Ducks
Incoming!
Beware Of The Cobra Chicken
lmao there is a lake near my house and the Canadian geese there dont know the phrase "calm thyself" and lets just say that i had run home far too many times
Making My Son Cry Because She Stole His Sucker. And The Look In Those Eyes Is Pure Evil
awwww the sucker matches him / her. I love Sun Conures, that's gonna be my next conure.
This Goose Blocking The Road
Get A Load Of This Ass****...
Trying To Take A Picture Posing With The Birds
Seagull Attack
Note: this post originally had 85 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
I understand having rescue birds at home that would not survive on their own...but pls do not buy birds that can fly and survive on their own
I get what you're saying, though I think it's fine if they're captive-bred as they likely wouldn't survive in the wild at that point anyway.
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My high school science teacher had a cockatoo that used to walk around the tables eating pencil led... as we were trying to fill in the bubbles on scantron forms. It was hilarious because there would always be someone fighting with him so they could finish their test before the bell rang! But Mr. Brumm, being the cool teacher he was (may he rest in peace) was always willing to give extra time if the bird was the issue.
My school bus driver in elementary school use to drive with an African Gray on her shoulder. It use to make fart sounds and yell " That's a ripper!" We loved it! :)
Is it me or are geese way too aggressive. I swear they have PTSD. Who hurt them?
It’s just their nature. They can be valuable guard animals, but you have to raise them up yourself, and anyone you don’t want to be attacked needs to come around often while they’re growing up.
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All this time I thought people were calling them RATS with wings... lol they're cats.
Just please, for Christ sakes, DO NOT keep a parrot without a partner! It's torture for these birds.
So hilarious, I will never stop laughing! It put a smile on my face!
I sure got a lot of belly laughs! My daughter came down stairs to see what was so funny!
Many of these posts are about people having birds as pets. I have myself had birds as pets and it was mostly biting and fighting. I do not understand why people get birds as pets, to be honest. They bite and then tear things apart. They poop everywhere and make a mess. But yeah, in the wild, the seagulls and doves are quite annoying and actively aggressive and douchy.
It's probably because you didn't do a very good job.
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A lot of these birds were just seeking or having dinner, so I think I'll call Jonas Grinevičius a jerk for having dinner tonight.
These are great photos, but birds can't be called "jerks" and shouldn't be "shamed." I agree with Hope Floats, "funny little characters" is a more appropriate term. In many of these photos, they've just done what comes naturally (pooping on cars) or being VERY SMART (taking a bag of snack chips from a store). If a pet bird destroys things in the house, it could be acting out to get attention -- maybe its human doesn't give it enough loving care. For a different view of a pet bird, take a look at this short video of a grieving parrot whose human Mom is dying: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh2sKRuJhXY
I had a budgie who was very well attended and loved, and only locked in a cage when no one was home or when something dangerous to him was happening (door open, stove on, etc.). He would chew things up right in front of you while you were playing with him. It's just what they do.
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Most of these are cute, but I honesty don't understand keeping birds as pets! I really don't understand allowing them near where you are preparing food ... Ick!
I had a pet budgie for 12 years. Got him when I was a kid and we weren't allowed cats or dogs in our rental apartment, and he lived till I was 24 and had long left home. He was an awesome pet and a very happy boy, and if I didn't have cats now, I would totally have another budgie.
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Hey BP! Can you find a way to block these fools?
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I understand having rescue birds at home that would not survive on their own...but pls do not buy birds that can fly and survive on their own
I get what you're saying, though I think it's fine if they're captive-bred as they likely wouldn't survive in the wild at that point anyway.
Load More Replies... My high school science teacher had a cockatoo that used to walk around the tables eating pencil led... as we were trying to fill in the bubbles on scantron forms. It was hilarious because there would always be someone fighting with him so they could finish their test before the bell rang! But Mr. Brumm, being the cool teacher he was (may he rest in peace) was always willing to give extra time if the bird was the issue.
My school bus driver in elementary school use to drive with an African Gray on her shoulder. It use to make fart sounds and yell " That's a ripper!" We loved it! :)
Is it me or are geese way too aggressive. I swear they have PTSD. Who hurt them?
It’s just their nature. They can be valuable guard animals, but you have to raise them up yourself, and anyone you don’t want to be attacked needs to come around often while they’re growing up.
Load More Replies... All this time I thought people were calling them RATS with wings... lol they're cats.
Just please, for Christ sakes, DO NOT keep a parrot without a partner! It's torture for these birds.
So hilarious, I will never stop laughing! It put a smile on my face!
I sure got a lot of belly laughs! My daughter came down stairs to see what was so funny!
Many of these posts are about people having birds as pets. I have myself had birds as pets and it was mostly biting and fighting. I do not understand why people get birds as pets, to be honest. They bite and then tear things apart. They poop everywhere and make a mess. But yeah, in the wild, the seagulls and doves are quite annoying and actively aggressive and douchy.
It's probably because you didn't do a very good job.
Load More Replies... A lot of these birds were just seeking or having dinner, so I think I'll call Jonas Grinevičius a jerk for having dinner tonight.
These are great photos, but birds can't be called "jerks" and shouldn't be "shamed." I agree with Hope Floats, "funny little characters" is a more appropriate term. In many of these photos, they've just done what comes naturally (pooping on cars) or being VERY SMART (taking a bag of snack chips from a store). If a pet bird destroys things in the house, it could be acting out to get attention -- maybe its human doesn't give it enough loving care. For a different view of a pet bird, take a look at this short video of a grieving parrot whose human Mom is dying: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh2sKRuJhXY
I had a budgie who was very well attended and loved, and only locked in a cage when no one was home or when something dangerous to him was happening (door open, stove on, etc.). He would chew things up right in front of you while you were playing with him. It's just what they do.
Load More Replies... Most of these are cute, but I honesty don't understand keeping birds as pets! I really don't understand allowing them near where you are preparing food ... Ick!
I had a pet budgie for 12 years. Got him when I was a kid and we weren't allowed cats or dogs in our rental apartment, and he lived till I was 24 and had long left home. He was an awesome pet and a very happy boy, and if I didn't have cats now, I would totally have another budgie.
Load More Replies... Hey BP! Can you find a way to block these fools?
Load More Replies...