Scotland, a country that has been part of the UK for more than 300 years, is known for many things, such as deep-friend mars bars, whiskey, and numerous genius inventions that make our lives so much easier. But there's probably one thing you didn't know about Scottish people, it's their one of a kind sense of humor that started making waves across the internet, especially on twitter. Not only are their jokes crude and funny, but they are also written in the way they speak. Scots have the unique ability to make other laugh and make their thrive at the same time. Ready for some unadulterated jokes? Then scroll below
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i feel like your profile picture is asking me why i haven’t practiced french today and it scares me
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And ducks quack...that's all well and good, but I think you're missing the point the poster was making.
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And using wigs, makeup, lashes every day to conform to someone's ideal of beauty is somehow preferable?
But scottish men can wear skirts, i mean kilts (i don't want to be struck down by the scottish god).
Hah hah, wise choice there. That's why men in Scotland wear a sgian-dubh (small ceremonial knife) with their Highland dress- just in case anyone has the gall to call a "kilt" a "skirt." Disclaimer: Men in Scotland do not actually use the sgian-dubh to stab people who refer to kilts as "man skirts."
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U G L Y you ain't got no alibye , you're Mama says your're ughly.
Truth. And we're taught that we're just ugly men so when we want to feel good about how we look it's hard.
And single too, because dude, if you come out like that expect "What do you mean, that Im ugly but I look cutie with all that ?" In 5..4..3.. 58231912-8...3-jpeg.jpg 
It is an art form really. Not for everyone but calling it nasty might be a bit harsh? It gives folks confidence
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Remember having that conversation with a mate at work when we were commuting - wasp gets on at our station and ends up in London not knowing what the f**k happened!
Flip flops and thongs are interchangeable terms for the footwear in California.
Every time I go to run the dishwasher my husband insists on jumping in the shower and turns off the dishwasher. Then later I go to unload it and it isn't clean. Well it happens at least once a week anyway.
Can't stop laughing ....!! Wish you Scots would visit Australia more; I'd pay good money to see some of you in a comedy show! That put a big smile on my face to start the day thanks!
Ma..... ARGE. Marge Simpson. Mom? Goodness you nearly gave me a heart attack mom.
Note: this post originally had 100 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
This is the first time I'm learning that unlike every other English speaker on Earth, Scottish people people write IN THEIR ACCENT. Like "wanty" instead of "want to" and "yersel" instead of "yourself." It's very strange. I'm now imagining if other people with regional accents wrote English to convey their spoken accents, like if working class Bostonians wrote "ay, whair'd ya pahk the cah?" And Queen Elizabeth wrote like, "Eim spaking to yehoh et what eh knaoh . . ."
Geth, many of these tweets, posts, and instant messages contain slang words, phrases, and terminology from "Scots" (not to be confused with Scots Gaelic). There is a huge debate within the linguistic community where Scots is a dialect or a language- I will not get into that here since I could probably right an entire dissertation on that. If you want to learn more about Scots, I would recommend checking out this website: https://www.scotslanguage.com/What_is_Scots%253F_uid2/What_is_Scots_%253F
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Read a sci-fi story, the main character is the captain of a ship, in something similar to Star Trek's Federation. They passed a law that said you can speak in your native tongue, and no one can make you speak standard. The ship's engineer is Scottish, and the captain never knows what he is saying.
Always wanted to go to Scotland but I'll probably never be able to. I guess it's a good thing because I'm to damn old to learn a foreign language.
Not all Scottish accents are the same - some parts have softer accents that are much easier to understand for the non-Scottish ear.
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I didn't understand half of these...but I read it in a Scottish accent so I crapped myself laughing anyway
It's funny imagining no-native English speakers trying tae read these and finding it hard. I like reading them in a Scottish accent.
Grew up in South West Scotland, Ayr. Accents can change dramatically within 10 miles. Wonderful.
English is my second language and I don't have an accent. But while I'm reading these posts, I feel like I am reading it with an accent and I loved it!!!
I’m half Scottish and most would call me funny (I say some because so many people hate me 😂)
This is the first time I'm learning that unlike every other English speaker on Earth, Scottish people people write IN THEIR ACCENT. Like "wanty" instead of "want to" and "yersel" instead of "yourself." It's very strange. I'm now imagining if other people with regional accents wrote English to convey their spoken accents, like if working class Bostonians wrote "ay, whair'd ya pahk the cah?" And Queen Elizabeth wrote like, "Eim spaking to yehoh et what eh knaoh . . ."
Geth, many of these tweets, posts, and instant messages contain slang words, phrases, and terminology from "Scots" (not to be confused with Scots Gaelic). There is a huge debate within the linguistic community where Scots is a dialect or a language- I will not get into that here since I could probably right an entire dissertation on that. If you want to learn more about Scots, I would recommend checking out this website: https://www.scotslanguage.com/What_is_Scots%253F_uid2/What_is_Scots_%253F
Load More Replies... Read a sci-fi story, the main character is the captain of a ship, in something similar to Star Trek's Federation. They passed a law that said you can speak in your native tongue, and no one can make you speak standard. The ship's engineer is Scottish, and the captain never knows what he is saying.
Always wanted to go to Scotland but I'll probably never be able to. I guess it's a good thing because I'm to damn old to learn a foreign language.
Not all Scottish accents are the same - some parts have softer accents that are much easier to understand for the non-Scottish ear.
Load More Replies... I didn't understand half of these...but I read it in a Scottish accent so I crapped myself laughing anyway
It's funny imagining no-native English speakers trying tae read these and finding it hard. I like reading them in a Scottish accent.
Grew up in South West Scotland, Ayr. Accents can change dramatically within 10 miles. Wonderful.
English is my second language and I don't have an accent. But while I'm reading these posts, I feel like I am reading it with an accent and I loved it!!!
I’m half Scottish and most would call me funny (I say some because so many people hate me 😂)
