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Insulting Is A Skill And Here Are 30 Of The Best Insults To Master It
144Kviews
Since we were little, we all knew that insulting someone or calling names was a big no-no. However, life is full of big no-no’s, and to counteract some of them, you have to use them for your own good. And an insult is probably one of the most used of forbiddens in the life of an adult. However, we are not talking here about calling someone a beaner bronco buster or something by far nastier - the insults in our list will make the receiver shiver from your intelligence, quiver at their own incompetence, and feel the undeniable superiority of your wit. Yes, here they are, the best insults ever recorded on the internet, delivered fresh & hot right to your screen.
Knowing fully well that by spreading nasty, you only get nasty back, we’ve figured out that calling someone to get back to Earth requires certain finesse and flair; thus, calling someone a phallus head does not make it into our list. Instead, these comebacks are as subtle as Claude Debussy’s Clair de Lune, as camouflaged as the workings of Sherlock Holmes, and as smart as Albert Einstein himself. Oh, also, as beautifully versed as the sonnets of mister William! So, we bet that out of these original insults, you’ll definitely find one to put in your pocket and air out when needed.
Well, are you ready to check out our list of the best insults ever? If so, clear up a few RAMs worth of space in your coconut for memorization and skip to the comebacks just a bit further down. Once you are there, vote for the funniest insults and share this article with anyone in need.
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I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you.
I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and poop out a smarter statement than whatever you just said.
Don’t you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning?
May both sides of your pillow be uncomfortably warm.
I’d agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.
Keep rolling your eyes, you might eventually find a brain.
I’m glad to see you’re not letting education get in the way of your ignorance.
Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parent’s job.
I get so emotional when you're not around. That emotion is happiness.
I am returning your nose. I found it in my business.
You are so ugly that when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a ticket for littering.
I’m jealous of all the people who haven’t met you.
You are the human version of period cramps.
You've only got 2 brain cells and they are both fighting for 3rd place.
Isn’t it dangerous to use your whole vocabulary in one sentence?
I told my therapist about you.
You couldn't pour water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel.
You are proof God has a sense of humor.
I bet your mom doesn’t put your coloring pages on the fridge.
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
You’re about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle.
You're so ugly even Stephen King has nightmares about you.
Oh, you don’t like being treated the way you treat me? That must suck.
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
You must have been born on a highway. That’s where most accidents happen.
Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.
If genius skips a generation, your children will be brilliant.
I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of your nostrils like that?
You’re a gray sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake.
Yeah? Well, you smell like hot dog water.
Note: this post originally had 148 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
“Just so you know, I typed this out using my middle finger”
Im 42 yr old female and I told a younger colleague the other day 'i'm so sorry, I'm guessing you are insulting me however the 'urban dictionary' and your abbreviations having quite made it into the Oxford English dictionary, much less the standard conversation for anyone over 12 yrs old. So come back and try again when you surpass the vocabulary range of a primary school child or even better when you can actually spring a sentence together and spell it correctly! Don't worry I'll be sat here with baited breath 🤐😋 oh and btw just because your bag screams LV it isn't LV. The stitching is just the start of your problems . The print should be LV not VL. 🤏👌. Think she is still trying to work out what i actually said to her 😋
Sinead, you are.. pretty good actually. In fact that's a masterpiece. To stand and calmly take another persons insults without getting riled up is an achievement in itself. To take a direct, personal insult from someone and shoot back a reply that leaves them thumbing through the Oxford English Dictionary while they try to work out what's going on though? I'm impressed.
Wow. I hope you have a good dental hygienist. You need one to help clean all that bulls**t out of your mouth. 😊 jk
Your face looks great...on my dart board.
Omg that’s cruel 😄
“Just so you know, I typed this out using my middle finger”
Im 42 yr old female and I told a younger colleague the other day 'i'm so sorry, I'm guessing you are insulting me however the 'urban dictionary' and your abbreviations having quite made it into the Oxford English dictionary, much less the standard conversation for anyone over 12 yrs old. So come back and try again when you surpass the vocabulary range of a primary school child or even better when you can actually spring a sentence together and spell it correctly! Don't worry I'll be sat here with baited breath 🤐😋 oh and btw just because your bag screams LV it isn't LV. The stitching is just the start of your problems . The print should be LV not VL. 🤏👌. Think she is still trying to work out what i actually said to her 😋
Sinead, you are.. pretty good actually. In fact that's a masterpiece. To stand and calmly take another persons insults without getting riled up is an achievement in itself. To take a direct, personal insult from someone and shoot back a reply that leaves them thumbing through the Oxford English Dictionary while they try to work out what's going on though? I'm impressed.
Wow. I hope you have a good dental hygienist. You need one to help clean all that bulls**t out of your mouth. 😊 jk
Your face looks great...on my dart board.
Omg that’s cruel 😄