‘Basic Trans Etiquette’ Goes Viral After Elliot Page Comes Out As Transgender Interview With Author
The star Elliot Page made an announcement that’s rocking the internet. They shared on their social media pages that they’re transgender, talked about their new pronouns (he/they), and explained that, from now on, their name is Elliot. With other celebrities coming out in support of Elliot, others on the internet are raising the question of ‘basic trans etiquette.’
One of the people who created a handy guide on Twitter is Martin, a trans and queer creator from Canada. Their thread went viral with over a whopping 179k likes and more than 65k retweets in less than a day. Check out what Martin had to say below and, when you’re done, let us know what you think of Elliot coming out, dear Pandas. And scroll down for Bored Panda’s interview with Martin about their guidelines.
Elliot’s breakthrough role was playing the title character in 2007’s Juno. For this role, Elliot received nominations for the Academy Award, BAFTA, Golden Globe, and the Screen Actors Guild Award for Best Actress while publicly identifying as female at the time.
More info: Twitter | Instagram | YouTube | TikTok
Elliot Page came out as transgender to huge support on the internet
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Image credits: elliotpage
Martin makes all kinds of videos on YouTube, does cosplay on TikTok, and is “working on living in the now.”
Elliot, an Academy Award nominee and “Juno” and “The Umbrella Academy” star, spoke about trans issues and thanked their fans and followers for their support. Elliot also pointed out how great it is to be their real self despite the discrimination that trans people face in everyday life.
“I feel overwhelming gratitude for the incredible people who have supported me along this journey,” Elliot said. “I can’t begin to express how remarkable it feels to finally love who I am enough to pursue my authentic self. I’ve been endlessly inspired by so many in the trans community. Thank you for your courage.”
They weren’t shy about pointing to the biggest issues surrounding trans people: “The statistics are staggering. The discrimination towards trans people is rife, insidious and cruel, resulting in horrific consequences. In 2020 alone, it has been reported that at least 40 transgender people have been murdered, the majority of which were Black and Latinx trans women.”
Elliot continued: “I love that I am trans. And I love that I am queer. And the more I hold myself close and fully embrace who I am, the more I dream, the more my heart grows and the more I thrive. To all trans people who deal with harassment, self-loathing, abuse, and the threat of violence every day: I see you, I love you, and I will do everything I can to change this world for the better.”
Twitter user Martin, who is trans, shared their trans etiquette guide
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Image credits: unsolvedtwt
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Image credits: unsolvedtwt
Martin told Bored Panda that it was jarring to learn that their thread went viral. “I saw that Elliot came out and I was super happy for him. And then I realized there would probably be a whole lot of people who just didn’t know the kind of stuff that I put in that thread. I wish it were common knowledge, and I hope there’s a day when things on that thread don’t need to be spelled out, but it unfortunately does,” they said.
“So I just figured making the thread would be an easy way to compile some basic stuff for allies who are trying to learn. I really didn’t expect it to blow up in the way it did, it got as far as Emma Portner’s Instagram story, which is wild. If I had known it was going to get that big, I maybe would have added just a quick guide on “he/they” pronouns. I use them myself, and there were a lot of people in the replies asking how to use them.”
Martin said that most of the replies they’ve seen about Elliot coming out online were positive. But not all of them. “There are some horribly transphobic replies just to my thread, people saying he was ‘playing make-belief’ and such. I went to look up Emma Portner’s Twitter to see if she had one, and all of the related tweets were asking intrusive questions on her sexuality. But I believe I’ve seen more positive than negative, which is a really good sign,” they explained.
Martin also shared a bit more about themselves. They’re studying in their first year of film school and they plan to put more effort into their YouTube channel when they get the time.
Others pitched in with their pointers
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Remember how you sometimes see a pet and say, "What a cute boy!" and the owner says, "It's actually a girl." And you say to the pet, "Aren't you a cute girl? Yes, you are!" Boom. It's as easy as that.
THAT IS THE PERFECT WAY TO DESCRIBE IT!
Basic trans etiquette = everyone's etiquette = realising it's not about other people fitting into your world but that you coexist with about 7 or 8 billion others who are all different - not just you - and all the same, so just get on with it and stop trying to dictate to everyone.
Yes, but in that case it actually is a girl. It's correcting a mistake that you made, not forcing one.
the sad thing is, people feel bad about misgendering someones pet but not other people, sadly i've already seen people use his (elliots) deadname, its been 1 day
People who've known Elliot only as Ellen for many years are going to slip up and call him by his former name or refer to him as "her" or "she" because it takes longer than a day to break a habit. One of my dearest friends is trans and I supported him 1000%, but it took some time to automatically think of him as "him" or "he" or call him by his chosen name. It's possible to love, respect and support the trans community and need an adjustment period at the same time. When I messed up, I said sorry and corrected it. It was literally the simplest thing in the world.
RinLo14 +
A good friend of mine comes from a conservative part of Texas and could be expected to have conservative views. But he doesn't and stands up for all kinds of groups. Re trans folk, he recently said "I don't understand it, but I don't have to. I just have to not be an asshole and let people live their lives with respect." I thought that was a great thing to state on his FB page in front of his friends many of whom do act like assholes to anyone they don't understand. It really is this simple. Don't be an asshole. Show respect. Done.
I think the problem these days, though, is that the term "asshole" has been redefined to mean "anyone I disagree with."
HerBlock ?
There are a lot of things you can disagree with... someone's actions or someones opinions but how do you disagree with who someone is. Maybe it's better to say you don't believe that someone can be born with a with a female body and a male brain or vice versa. I would have to disagree with you because there is undeniable biological scientific evidence to the contrary so to me it doesn't make sense to say that you disagree with how someone was born, I would never assume someone is an asshole because of what they don't understand or if they have different religious views as long as that person were respectful to others. I'm a cisgender female but I find biology fascinating, I find it fascinating that all these perfect conditions have to line up to form a human being it seems like a miracle that we are ever born at all...all it takes is for one chromosome, one chemical process to be off and you've got someone who is born different.
HerBlock follower
But the thing is that is a conservative view. It used to be the liberal view but society and politics have moves so much now. Conservatives mostly have the view that people should just be whatever they want to be, but with the caveat that free speech should not be infringed upon. Free speech is infinitely more important than offense.
I have a cousin that went through this. The religious family members think they disowned him and us that support him, but we really disowned them. The few times the last few years we all have been together the religious ones would pull him aside, call him a her, say god does not approve of them, and throw bible verses. WHO NEEDS THAT??? They helped me decide to ditch Christianity. One of the many reasons. Luckily my immediate family(mom, brother and all my kids and their significant others feel the same way I do about my cousin and the rude family members. Love wins!!
I can relate. I have a cousin who is LGBTQ. They came out to me first. Several of our family members are Christian fundamentalists. But the majority of us fully support my cousin.
A lot of people do not practice true Christianity. According to the Bible, if Christians do not care for their families they are worse than non-believers. (1 Timothy 5:8) However, trying to convert someone isn't wrong and is in fact ordered. (Matthew 28) However, it must be done out of love. Otherwise is basically means nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)
Fair enough sneaky ninja.The pretenders try to hide behind the bible when they judge others.
A lot of people also do not know that old Bible never says anything about homosexuality being sin. As far as I know, In original text it was about pedophilia , even Sodoma and Gomora events happened because of pedophilia. And it was changed into homosexuality after centuries, when different cultures started translating bible. So homo and trans phobia is purely a late society edit. It was just easier to controll/discriminate and kill in the name of god, and gain the power over people.
Every single thing you just said is absolutely incorrect. Have you never opened a Bible? Have you never done a simple Google search to learn how the Bible has been translated over the years? I understand that you hate religion and the Bible, but pretending it doesn't say what it clearly says is just ... stupid.
The SneakyNinja; no, it wasn't a trending social media article. It's been verified by many people who study ancient/dead languages. The only people who are "changing the bible" are those who are accepting blatant misinterpretations. This isn't "new." People have been studying ancient languages for a very long time and have been able to interpret the bible and know how the words used in it compare to other writings from the same region at roughly the same time in the same language. MANY things in the bible have been misinterpreted. Where the bible uses the word "virgin" in reference to Mary....it should say "maiden." The Red Sea should be the sea of reeds, which was basically a shallow river. The most glaring and maddening thing about how the words "aresenkoitai" and "malakoi" weren't REtranslated to mean "homosexual" or the act of homosexuality until 1946. That's right. Before then, ALL bibles in ALL languages referred to pederasty, not homosexuality. Look it up.
I think it is likely that you may have heard of that article a month ago on Bored Panda that said this exact same thing. Or somewhere else, as it's becoming a rather popular argument on the internet. However, it did not address all of the passages in the Bible that discuss homosexuality, and it was debunked in the comments of that Bored Panda article. The Greek translation is different from the Hebrew and the Greek word is what people refer to as being changed, not the Hebrew word that means homosexuality. As I said, it's your choice whether or not you follow what the Bible said, but don't change it. I sincerely hope this was a misunderstanding.
na nu yes
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As for transgender individuals, while that was not around a lot at the time, we can look at the Bible to see if it is wrong. Genesis 1:27 states that God created people with the biological sexes of male and female. Deuteronomy 22:5 states that a man shall not wear a woman's garment, so when transgender individuals wear clothing of the opposite sex it is wrong. Women and men also have different roles in the family unit, as stated in Ephesians 5:21-33. If someone is transgender and Christian they will not be following this. God clearly separates men and women on the basis of biological sex, and transgender people do not follow certain commands by being transgender. I can't change what is in the Bible. I do not mean to be hateful to anyone, and I do love the people in the LGBT community. They are people and deserve respect. I am simply stating that true Christianity does not support this. You don't have to follow it, but don't use it to make arguments that it does not make.
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There are several passages about homosexuality in the Bible, so I am not sure which you are referring to. Here are a few: 1 Corinthians 6:9, 1 Timothy 1:10, and Romans 1:24-32. God also defines marriage between one man and one woman (Matthew 19:4-6 and Genesis 2:24) Of course, many people in the Old Testament had more than one wife, but there are many things that Christians are held to that Jews were not, such as loving their enemies. (Matthew 5:43-48) There is a huge difference between Old Testament Judaism and Christianity and I am not sure how many people realize that. Please do not use the Bible to support this. You don't have to follow it, but don't change it. This is what so many Christians do already. They participate in all sorts of sinful things like lying, fornication, and other sins even though it is stated that they should not do that, and they act like it is alright by taking verses out of context and ignoring others (such as citing Romans 6:14 but ignoring Romans 6:15).
Why ditch your religion? it's not Christianity's fault your family was horrid. Two completely separate things. There's nothing in the bible about trans being evil.
That is not the only reason, and I don't agree with people hiding behind the bible to treat people bad. To me, the bible is full of judgement and hypocrisy. I could go on all day. I go to a site called Christian forums sometimes. All the Christians there do is argue about how their view of the bible is right and slot if times they are downright rude to other Christians. Alot of them also say the bible says the earth is flat. So I have many reasons for turning my back on Christianity.
The brilliance of the Bible is that it doesn't need to spell out an exhaustive list of everything that is good or evil. Other religions do that; they have to create a never-ending list of what people can and can't do. The Bible is different. It provides principles, explains the character and nature of God, and the 10 Commandments (the "moral law") encompasses God's character. So the Bible does not need to use the term "transgender." It says "You shall not lie." That's enough to condemn transgenderism. But it goes further: "You shall not commit adultery." Again, condemning transgenderism, homosexuality, and fornication. Sodom and Gomorrah were destroyed, in part, because its "men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts..."
Pretty sure it's actually Satan those relatives are worshipping.
Chris Oakley like
I'm pro trans. Hurray for being your true self. I absolutely mean that. But what these etiquette rules seem to say is, "We want to be totally accepted by general society but still want to be treated exceptionally. Let's start with the conventions of grammar, and references to the past, and see what other barriers we can erect around ourselves."
Good for you for being pro trans. I think the only problem with the etiquette rules is that a few vocal people think they speak for everyone who is transgender. I know that there is a minority of people that don't consider their 'deadname' as a taboo thing to utter, and prefer to use the term 'birth name' etc. But proponents of the term 'deadname' say using one is akin to violence, and I personally don't agree to that. Because it's basically attributing malice to every action, and that's never helpful. Some people may use the 'deadname' as a way to hurt the other person, but I'm betting the fast majority of people who slip up do it because they aren't used to the change yet. It's no different from your name being changed by deed poll, are you going to go nuts every time someone uses the old name? Intent matters. People who are outraged and presume intent don't do themselves or others any favors.
When a friend of mine told me they had transitioned, I said to them that I might use their birth name, not with bad intentions at all, but because I had known them for so long as a certain name. Looking back, I actually feel guilty about that comment, as I feel it isn't very supportive or indicative of being a good ally
I knew trans woman. He was biologically male. He did not care which pronoun people used. I was introduced using the pronoun 'he', and that's what many people used. He did not change his name. It was still Dan. Some of the advice here would apply to anyone. (Don't say, "she, he, it whatever"!) But yes, some of the rules are made up and are not written down in some world-wide constitution.
Beans no
I agree with you regarding mention of the past. It's perfectly reasonable to call someone by the name or pronouns that they identify as, I just don't think it's helpful or realistic to rewrite history with these. There was a real period of time with real thoughts and real relationships and real actions in the world of a girl named Ellen. Of course she's gone now and we should be welcoming and encouraging to Elliott, but it's just going to further confuse people to try to convince them "No, the person you knew was a man all those years." I agree with Beans, it seems some individuals are wrongly trying to set the rules as spokespeople for a very diverse group.
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Troux easy
How does this work in regards to his awards / accolades? For example, he won several "best actress" awards for his performance in Juno.
Maybe just say it like you say it here: he won the award for best actress in Juno.
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Katrin, the body still IS biologically female; that can't be changed.
The awards were earned. To revoke them in retrospect is just mean, IMHO.
That's true of course, but the whole point of this article is to basically never to mention anything about him ever being a her. As the awards can't really be retroactively changed (best actor is a separate award won by somebody else), I really have no clue how this is supposed to be handled. Obviously, this is mostly out of curiosity on my part - I doubt I would ever get in a conversation where I'd have to talk about his best actress awards, but if I did, I have no clue how to go about it while conforming to everything martin has suggested in his posts.
Its like Caitlin Jenner competing in men's racing in the Olympics. When she did, she competed as a male and identified, as far as we know, as a male at that time. I might be wrong on Jenner's sport, too lazy to google it.
it was decathalon
It is still the reward for best actress. Why should that be changed? I mean, they do not deny that there was a time and a career before coming out and (perhaps) transitioning. Neither would anybody sane.
LOL, I don't think this undoes the past.
That's actually a really good question.
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Kai the guy love
If basic etiquette dictates that the birth name never be spoken we will have a problem in this instance, and I suspect he knows it. 'Elliot formerly known as Ellen', or 'Ellen, who now goes by Elliot' seems like a reasonable compromise for someone who won some pretty major, gender-specific, awards prior to their transition
Their birth name becomes like a former last name from a really messy divorce. Yes, that was them, that's not who they are now and they will not look kindly on being reminded of that part of their past.
@Truth Monster: he won awards for best actress/best female actor, those categories can't be changed. As for the messy divorce analogy, there are often kids involved, are we supposed to pretend those don't exist either so that they don't have to be reminded of that aspect of their past?
Alec +
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He should have to give them up because a male cannot win an award for an actress. Not trying to be insensitive, trying to be reasonable
No, they won them when they were a woman.
Potatogamers2 ?
I truly hope they are happy and in peace. That's what really matters! I can't imagine the amount of stress this lifted from them.
To people saying he should give his awards back, how stupid are you? Do you have to give your little league trophies back because you're an adult now?!
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It's natural for all children to become adults. It is not natural for women to become men (or vice versa).
That doesn't change his acting ability nor his right to the awards earned in his career. Wtf
dont be an asshole herblock
Respect people. Be understanding. Be an ally. If you can't do that, then leave them alone and mind your own business. It's not that difficult. Really.
Elliot looks so happy now! I hope he is doing well <3
I was so excited to learn of this. He's just like me! He's proof that I can grow up and live my life as a he/they. And that may not sound like a big deal to some, but for someone else to be out there who is like me feels... validating for me and my confusing gender (not totally trans guy, but not totally non-binary... It's frusterating, I know). I love umbrella acadamy, and the fact tha Elliot plays one of my favs (sorry, but my FAV is Kluas... yeh I'm THAT bitch) is just... y e s p l e a s e. Thanks for reading this very confusing comment... I'm just a VERY bored feral child.
MEEEE!
Hey, there Orange Chicken! I live in the midwest too and know how tough it can be to not 'fit in.' I'm a single mom. I'm bi, and I believe all animals (and people) should be treated with respect. I live in rural farm country so the combination of all of these things makes me... weird to the general populace. It can be lonely out there when you don't fit in. So as a fellow midwestern square peg, I see you. I respect you and I appreciate you. 😊 It's a big, mean world out there and it helps to reach out to each other from time to time.
Aww! thank you so much :) that means a lot! And your right, midweasterns gotta stick together!
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Not fit in? Please... "coming out" now is not at all the "brave" thing to do anymore. Anyone who so much as questions you now is crucified while you get praised by everyone and their dog.
OrangeChicken Good response!
Help please I really don't understand. Exactly how can someone change their gender? I don't see how thinking it's different changes anything. If you have XX chromosomes you're a woman and if you have XY chromosomes you are a man (This is in general I know stuff like Swyer syndrome exists). There are other differences as well. That is just basic biology. I really do not understand this at all can someone please explain? It doesn't make sense to me.
Basically you are not wrong that people usually have XY or XX chromosome but these people feel like they were put in the wrong body. It can damage them mentally because of the body dysphoria coming from someone that identifies as a male but has breasts. This male can then have surgery to remove both breasts (double mastectomy) and then get surgery to remove their vagina and replace it with a penis. (I don't know details, just the basics.) And then they can start on testosterone which would override the estrogen and allow them to grow things like beards and thick armpit hair. Just more masculine stuff. It's the same for females, hormone treatments and surgeries. They can't change their DNA but they can change their hormones and outward appearance to match their gender identity.
@TheSneakyNinja Yes that is exactly what I am saying. Gender is a human made concept. Sex is biological, gender is mental. You can be biologically male but identify as a female and have female body parts. Biologically you are still male but mentally and physically you are a female. Also please do not downvote me or TheSneakyNinja, they were asking a genuine question and I am giving them a genuine response, thank you
Thank you for your response! Since that has been explained, I think that what is at the core of the main issue/debate about trans people is whether treating them based on their biological sex or treating them based on their preferred gender is right. (Like if they should be allowed in their preferred locker rooms or sports, what pronouns to call people, whether or not someone would date someone who is trans, etc)
Yes people will say "Omg that is definitely discrimination against trans people." but based on the fact that a lot of trans people already can't play sports because they are trans, I think that weight based sports that include trans people or intramural sports are our best options. It sucks that these are what we have but in my opinion if I were trans and into sports I would rather be on a weight based team or intramural team rather than be kicked out of sports altogether. Which some people might not like that and it might feel like we're just giving trans people the scraps, but we can't force people to play against or with someone that might make them uncomfortable. I wish we could but that's just going to breed hate and resentment which will lead to violence or bullying. We have to take one step at a time, starting with gender neutral bathrooms and locker rooms, then getting sports teams for them, whether they are weight based, intramural or trans only. 1/2
I do suppose that a biological male would have an advantage over biological females in a sport. Other they might not if they have taken estrogen treatments? This might make them more like a biological female in strength, although size might still be a problem. I think that the best solution would probably be intramural sports categorized by weight, like wrestling? Or just intramural sports in general. And I agree that these issues need to be discussed because they matter to a lot of people. I really don't understand why we are getting downvoted just because we are having a friendly discussion, but oh well, trolls will be trolls
Yes, I suppose that gender-nuetral bathrooms and locker rooms, as well as male and female ones, would probably be a solution that would satisfy everyone. Of course, you only need gender-neutral bathrooms with bathrooms that have several stalls. We don't need restrictions on one-room bathrooms that are designed for one person to use at a time. As for transgenders participating in sports, I do see how that could be a problem since biological males are often stronger than biological females and this would likely give a transgender female an advantage in women's sports. An example of this is Fallon Fox. Since Fallon's biological sex is male it can be said that Fallon has an advantage over the biological women. I don't mean to be offensive by saying that btw. I'd like to know what you think about it. I agree that sports with both females and males could be a good solution for sports like soccer and baseball. These are important issues to discuss since they matter a lot to many people
I do think it would be wrong to make someone do something that they are uncomfortable with, but if everyone playing the sport is fine with a transgender teammate playing, then it should not be a problem. Even if that wasn't the original intention.
Intramural sports based on weight could be a good idea. I am not involved in any official league but I do play sports with my friends, both male, and female, and it has been fine. I do think that it is okay to separate based on biological sex as there are biological differences between people, but that doesn't mean that there can't also be sports that include transgender people as well. I think we could probably have both. However, some could still think that is discriminating against transgender people. What do you think?
@TheSneakyNinja I think that gender neutral places should exist for this exact reason. It would make cis people uncomfortable to change around trans people (this isn't transphobic, it would just make them uncomfortable) and we can't really force them to accept that. So gender neutral locker rooms/bathrooms should be created, anyone can change or do their business in these, if it makes cis people uncomfortable to change in there than they can use the assigned gender ones. And for sports I think they should be able to play on the team that matches their gender because having someone who is biologically female but looks like a male would be weirder than having a ftm male on the men's team. Or they could even join a intramural sport that has both males and females on it. But that's just my take on things
So basically you are saying that gender is in the brain and that the bodies people have aren't necessarily male or female?
2/2. Trans only sports might sound like discrimination, it's really not, it's just a way for them to be able to play the sport they love and it's probably the easiest to coordinate. After we manage to fight for trans only sports then we can open the lines of communication for the possibility of either weight based sports or intramural sports. Then after that we can work towards getting them on the team they want to be on.
Alrighty, so here we go! <3 First, thank you so much for asking politely. :D You're confusing sex and gender, I think. Sex is based on biology and anatomy. The two sexes are male and female. Then, there's gender. Gender is based on how you feel and what's up in your brain. People don't actually change gender, they change the gender that they're known as. People are assigned a gender at birth that correlates to their sex, which is why it takes longer for trans people to realize their gender. <3 Hope that helps!
@HarperTheCentaur What do you think of gender-neutral bathrooms like this? There would be zero chance of making someone else uncomfortable because of the stall gaps or because someone in the bathroom looks like they are of the opposite gender since each of these is designed for single-person use. Of course, it won't be easy to make new bathrooms in every building but people could do it at least in the new ones. sap_gender...site-1.jpg
That is a tough one! In general I would say, don't question it. If that person wants to participate in those activities or go to those places that's their decision, and if they don't, that's still their decision. For example, I'm nonbinary and have a pretty fluid gender, meaning my gender is different at different times. My pronouns stay the same, but I will "present" differently-that is, wear different clothes and makeup. So on a day that I feel masculine and look like a boy, I'll use the men's restroom if I can get away with it. On a day that I feel masculine and look like a girl, I'll use the women's restroom if I can get away with it. And then etcetera.
Thank you for responding! I do think I understand this a little more. I have another question (You don't have to answer. I don't mean to bother you), and I do think it is a very, very controversial one. What about bathrooms, sports, locker rooms, and other activities/places that have been separated based on biological sex (male and female) to create privacy or fair competition for years? Should transgender individuals be allowed in activities/places that do not match their biological sex? Since the purpose of these activities/places is to separate people based on biological sex, is it wrong to keep them this way?
Omg, Harper, I'm genderfluid! :D Nice to meet you! And SneakyNinja, those bathroom would be AMAZING.
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Transgender people should go into the bathroom that correlates with their gender, not their sex. :) It can be very dangerous to make transgender people go into a bathroom that aligns with their genitals, because it makes everyone know what their sex is, which can be uncomfortable. Also, transphobes might hurt them. Lastly, a transitioned man in a female bathroom can be scary for the females in there. :O
People could also just make all bathrooms rows of single-use rooms instead of stalls. Then no one would be uncomfortable since there is zero chance of anyone seeing inside the room you are using since it's not a stall with giant cracks. If everyone did that this wouldn't even be an issue. I mean like this: sap_gender...ebsite.jpg
Also, I would like to know if you think that separating people based on biological sex in it itself is wrong. After all, why is it a problem to separate based on biological sex and not gender idenity if they truly are different things and one does not affect the other? Of course, people can cause violence to others (no matter what bathroom people use) but I am speaking about separation in it of itself. After all, by this definition, they are different things. (This also applies to sports). What do you think?
Paul Brown's comment at the end gives me hope.
I know, I loved that!!!
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Actually I find it pathetic that he feels he has to buckle and identify himself as a "cis" male. Two genders male and female. Who you love is your business, however you identify yourself is up to you but no one can or should tell me how to refer to myself or refer to me in a way I don't prefer. See how that works both ways?
Nobody is telling you to do anything. Paul Brown chose to clarify his identity as a cisgender man. Anyway, there are far more than just two genders, so you need to stop being so aggressive & open yourself up for some reeducation.
I cannot believe that you said there are two genders, then also said however you identify yourself is up to you, as if there aren't many nonbinary/genderqueer people who are not male or female. Like what?
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A. B. Gilman love
Some people are not comfortable in their own skin until they make these changes. Who are we to decide who is miserable and who is happy. They don't need to conform to judgy people's standards.
On the note of being polite in these cases, what happens if you slip up? I feel like it would be pretty common to have a slip of the tongue in the beginning and accidentally refer to him as "she" or still use their birth name just because you've done it for so long. Should you apologize after correcting yourself or simply correct yourself and move on?
Trans man here! As it said in the list, don't make a big deal over it. It's awkward & annoying. Just correct yourself & move on. "Wow, I love Elliot's work! She - I mean he - is so talented!"
Ok, I have a trans friend who recently came out, and he goes by Levi now. I'll admit, I do sometime use their deadname and their old pronouns, but they know that I'm trying to not. So just apologize, and move on with your life.
Just apologize and move on. One of my students went from female to male after their first year in college. Did I slip up when he came back after summer break? Certainly, especially because he transitioned over summer and the school IT systems hadn't been changed until October, so we saw the deadname for a while (which is how we'd known him). Luckily he was kinda chill about honest slipups.
Maybe just do as you would normally do? In person- apologize and own your mistake. Say that you did not mean to offend him/her/them. And if you are unsure, ask politley, especially if the person is close to you.
CarO love
Honestly, most people I have worked with who are trans are pretty good at rolling with it, especially once they are more confident in their transition.. correct yourself and move on.... but their supporters, or worse their "defenders", the Karen version of "super woke" can be more easily offended.
My feelings exactly! Especially his family and close circle of friends who have known him as Ellen from a very very long time, slip ups can be easier. Some may do it intentionally. But most of them will be struggling!
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Youre way too gentle, its fine. He's a man now, he should be ready to face the music.
SkullCrusherXxX no
The person now wanting to be called Elliot has always looked deeply unhappy to me. I hope they find happiness.
I have a friend who is beginning the transition. Still experimenting at the moment, but it's super helpful to know how I can help them with it. :)
Everyone has a path that belongs to them and them alone. Don't interfere but support. We are all equal.
Stop the hating lets look at the new and different way at this. Some of us hate the phobics and I do too. This is someone trying to express themselves and u phobics can't do anything about it. SO JUST SHUT UP AND STOP THE NEGATIVITY.
Whoever downvoted you can go f*ck off. This comment is pure gold.
Thank u
Aj Grimes (them/they) good
Genuine question from someone trying to understand....so we've worked really hard in society to break up some gender norms (gender being a construct) - so for it to be ok for girls not to be cute and fluffy, and to be into sports, science etc; and for boys to feel free to express their emotions, be openly empathic, to like dressing up etc, so what is the extra impetus that makes someone assigned female at birth convinced that they are a boy? And for non-binary, what is the difference between saying that you are nb to saying that you are a girl who's just not that into traditional gender feminity? I say this as a middle aged woman who has never been society's perception of 'feminine', so I'm confused.
Back to the being afab (assigned female at birth) feeling like a boy, this can happen because they are much more interested in typically masculine stuff or they hate their body, their breasts, butt, hips, vagina, etc. and just wished that it was a boys body. Some feel that they are a boy put in the wrong body, it really varies from person to person. I don't have anything more that related to your questions but feel free to ask me anything that you are confused or curious about. Hope this helps! 2/2
Please ignore Don't Look, I can answer this to the best of my ability for you. So I am a demigirl (I stated non-binary in a couple posts, that was for the sake of simplicity, I need to use my actual gender for this.) And that means that I partially relate to being a female, sometimes I like to dress up and be more "girly" and then other times I prefer to be more neutral and genderless. So for me I realized this when I didn't fit the stereotypical gender norm as a girl and sometimes I felt that I wanted to be more genderless. And being non-binary means that you don't feel like you fit into either gender as male or female, for some this might mean that they feel like both, none, more like one than the other or something else entirely, it varies from person to person. For some non-binary people they feel more like a girl that doesn't want to be very "girly" so they might still use she/her pronouns and look feminine but still identifies as enby (enby is the same as nb). 1/?
Well, honestly it comes down to a brain science. It's a dysmorphia. In all likely hood, she couldn't figure out why she was never really happy. Therapists (likely multiple) diagnosed her with whatever and since we are in the age we are, she can say she feels like a male and a specific sort of therapist gives permission for the hormone therapy, drugs and mental permission (for lack of a better term) to change mental and physical gender. Without a mental doctor's approval, one cannot have a sex change. Now, to throw a little annoying into this answer - a growing "choice" to make for these transgender people is to do a reverse transgender. It really is just proof that someone feeling as though they are in the wrong body is a mental illness.
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Don't Look like
I have no problem calling him "he", but "they" still smacks my sensibilities because of everything that was taught to me about proper grammar and use of singular/plural pronouns. To me, "they" should mean more than one person. It's the change in grammar that's hard to get used to, not supporting the LGBTQ community, they have my total support!
For some they use the pronoun "they" because they feel like they are one or more genders or even no gender so he and she don't fit well. I'm non-binary (for the sake of simplicity, I don't want to get into the details of my gender) and use they/them pronouns because it matches my gender better, I really do feel like I have more than one gender so they would be plural. I really hope this helps!
Yes, that explanation really does help and makes sense in a way that never occurred to me before!! I also will call a person whatever pronoun they ask me, I just really have to get that mean English teacher out of my head... LOL!
hi kiss army! People use they when they aren't male or female, or they feel somewhere in between or both. (etc.) I use they them pronouns, and yet I agree that ze/zir should be more widely used!
I had never heard the explanation of feeling somewhere in between or both and now that I have, the they/them really makes a lot of sense. I appreciate the learning moment. I have a trans nephew who uses he/him so I did not understand.
They has been used for individual people since 1375. This isn't anything new.
This is very informative! I was aware of some things but this really makes sense... so thankyou
This... person who tries to tell people how they are supposed to wrongly speak is pretentious and condescending.
Use of the term Latinx is controversial. Many Latinos do not like it. People hear and think, "I'm cool and hip and never mean, so I will use this new word." Who says it's the "correct" new word? Not the Latinos that were interviewed on MPR. The majority did not like it. A "Latinx trans woman" is also known as a "Latina".
“Don’t use their birth name ever” is a bad rule, though. I mean, yes, going forward, refer to them as their new name, but people shouldn’t get bent out of shape if you say “Ellen Page came out as trans and goes by Elliot now.” If you NEVER EVER use their birth name, then it’s impossible for people to know who tf you’re talking about. So use it once to clarify who you mean, that should be allowed. I mean I spent too long trying to figure out who someone named Kayleigh was, people said she was trans, and refused to “deadname” her, so I had no idea who anyone was talking about and as a result thought she was a different person from Luke, meaning I was inadvertently deadnaming her by thinking Luke and Kayleigh were different people rather than the same person before and after coming out as trans. If someone had just said “Kayleigh is trans, she was born as Luke” that would’ve cleared things up and I wouldn’t have accidentally been insulting her for a while.
So I can’t STAND “don’t EVER use their birth name”. You should be able to use anyone’s old name to clear up confusion, like clarifying that James Rodriguez is James Roday, or country music star Charles Esten was known as Chip Esten in the 90s. Taking a second to clarify who you mean isn’t offensive, and then everyone realizes who you’re talking about and doesn’t accidentally think Elliott is just Ellen’s very similar-looking brother.
Language related question (since my language doesn't distinguish "he" and "she", we have one pronoun for everyone). Why does someone want to be called both "he" and "they"? Also, why in English is it expressed in the format "she/her", "he/him" - do some people prefer "she/him" or they/her" or any other combination like that? Thanks for any reply :).
Someone can want to be called he/they or she/him because it relates better to their gender. For the sake of simplicity I'm going to say my gender is non-binary, I use she/they pronouns, which means that you can use she/her pronouns and they/them pronouns interchangeably. For example: "This is Anarchy, she is my best friend, I've known them for my whole life!" Notice how I used both she and they? Those are the pronouns I like and I don't mind if you use them interchangeably. And we use the format she/her or he/him because it shows both the contexts we'd use them, that's the best way I can put it. So she/her is used like: "She is really pretty." "Her name is Sky." And the same thing applies to he/him and she/they etc. We don't really use they/her because she/they makes more sense (as for as I know, it might vary from person to person.) I really hope I explained this well and that it helps, if you have any questions feel free to ask!
Some of the twitter comments on Elliot's tweet disgusted me. It makes me sad that so many people are so hateful even in 2020. It makes me wonder wtf is wrong with some people how they can be so scummy. It's not hard to just call him Elliot and use a couple of different words ffs. But you know what? One of the glimmering beacons of kindness in a sea of hateful comments, was from a pastor, of all people. This really stood out as absolutely amazing to me and proves religion is never a reason to be hateful to the LGBTQ+ community.
Where was all this righteous people when I was growing up fat and ugly and had to take ALL SORTS of SH#T and abuse???
Is he still going to play vanya as a girl? Or is vanya going to be trans too.
he is going to continue playing Vanya. as for if Vanya will be trans, that's up to Gerard Way to decide
Hannah Hartley follower
Hannah Hartley love
Good for him, if that'S what he wants, but tbh I just hope he'll keep playing Vanya!
He will! Fellow Umbrella Academy Fan here!
Basic Trans Etiquette (aka Basic Etiquette).
Just a quick "in defense of". When someone transitions, for many of their loved one's it is confusing. They are suppose to understand, but not ask. I think the above rules are a helpful reminder that some questions are rude, but there still needs to be understanding on both sides. You get pregnant, you get divorced, you get cancer, people are always going to ask uncomfortable questions, because they simply don't understand. Let's all cut each other a little slack.
Been here, done this. Slipped up, said, "girl" to a guy, and said, "S**t, sorry!" and he said, "No problem," and all good on both sides.
So as a non-native speaker, who grew up in a language that doesn't have gender pronouns: can someone please give me examples for "they/them" sentences? Would they be used when I'm talking about them? Elliot saying that his preferred pronouns are "he/they" is really confusing for me. Why not "he" and "him"?
By saying his pronouns are he/they, Elliot means his pronouns are he/him/his & they/them/their & can be used interchangeably. Examples: He is a talented actor; they are a talented actor. Look at him now; look at them now! Elliot deserves all of his awards; Elliot deserves all of their awards.
No problem! Thanks for taking the time to ask!
Thank you!
Respectfully asking questions is how we learn. An open mind is a wonderful trait :)
(In the context of personal friends, not celebrities) What's the etiquette on complimenting someone's looks? It's still natural for a straight cis male to be attracted to a feminine face, regardless of their identification. I would worry that any honest (non-gendered) compliments could hurt them if coming from someone attracted to the gender they no longer identify as. I would hate to make a male feel like they're still an attractive female, but it might also be rude to never mention your friend's attractiveness at all. Imagine a cis guy telling Elliott he has beautiful eyes - might Elliott feel he's being seen as a woman because of the source?
It's different person-to-person, but as a trans guy I love getting compliments on things that aren't my chest, hips, & ass (I get enough of that pre & post transition) regardless of who says it. Though if one wants to be extra careful, "beautiful" has a feminine connotation & "handsome" has a male one. I would keep it gender neutral. Some of my favorite words are gorgeous, charming, fantastic, stunning, & lovely.
Thank you, that's generally what I've tried to do. I still feel bad that I see them that way. It can be particularly hard to draw the line when it's someone that you've known through the transition.
Hahahahahaha! I love how being trans is now "in style". I guess being only gay these days is sooooooo 2000s. -eye roll- The other thing... who cares? I mean seriously... when Ellen came out on her show, it was EPIC. These days, it seems like random people who are losing popularity/fame all of a sudden have to come out of some closet and all the goldfish rally around them like they did something special. These stars don't care about my sexual orientation or gender, and I don't care about theirs.
that last one made me happy
What a load of BS all this trans stuff becomes. All the names and terms keep flying around faster than people can leaern them. Trans, fine. But all this queer, intersex, blah blah. Fine, I identify as a toaster.
Jeremy Porter no
W.H.O. classified transgenderism as a mental illness until 5/29/2019. What changed??? Link implies stigma was part of the reasoning. https://www.bbc.com/news/health-48448804
David Clayton -
YES PLEASE RAISE AWARENESS ABOUT THE TRANS COMMUNITY!!!!! I used to be trans and I used the name Kaleb for a while because it was close to my birthname Kyleigh, but my dad's middle name is Kyle so I did not want to use that. This is the first time that I ever brought up the topic that Iused to be trans.
I'm so excited and proud of Elliot, they've come so far! He's just like me, he's trans and I'm trans and they are just living their best life! God, I want that so bad..hopefully after I move out!
All the best to Elliot! Now I just pray that nobody on Netflix will think that subsequently making Vanya trans is a good idea.
I have a friend from way back, even elementary school, that has transitioned a few years ago, and I have wondered the proper way to use pronouns when talking about the past (thier pronoun is he, however it was not back then.) Obviously I just wanted to do the right things, and I think the article kinda addressed this.
"Who's Elliott PAge?""Oh, they started in Juno" ... no, that's not easy, that's stupid. Elliott Page, mum, used to be an actress called Ellen Page, you saw her in Juno. Mum takes it naturally, now there's no more Ellen, now there's Elliott.
Thanks for posting this. As a pretty clueless older (cis) cat lady, I have often wondered what the most courteous, respectful ways to refer to/address trans folks are, and this is very helpful.
I'm glad he found peace with this. I always thought he had such sad eyes before. Hopefully this is the piece that was missing from his life, and I think Eliot is going to be great role model for folks in the trans community. For better or worse, putting a famous face on "controversial' topic can go a long way toward normalizing it. He's always struck me as a kind, well spoken human regardless of pronouns. Also Paul from the trailer park is an angel.
i love this. i have a couple of friends that are trans or non-binary and if I say or someone else says their pronouns wrong I immediately correct them or myself. i also might be agender but I don't really know. all I know is that I'm not really a girl or a boy.
I'm happy for him!
I love that this moment has been used as a learning opportunity for lots of people. Everyone should know the basics of how to behave towards trans people to make them as comfortable as possible; they generally face enough hate from others as is (unfortunately). It must have been so hard for Elliot to come out (it must be hard for anyone) and I congratulate them. <3
My language doesn't have pronouns. Makes it easier.
Elliot Page did used to be Ellen Page, that's just reality. If you'd asked Elliot that years ago he would have said "I'm Ellen Page and I'm a woman. So why the issue with the facts of history here? Why are we even talking about how right or wrong it is to speak the truth about the past? If we ignore the past and say Elliot Page was always a man, are we then going to take that to its inevitable woke conclusion and ask why a man was allowed to steal numerous female acting roles over the years? Or are we just going to accept real liberal values to say anyone can be whoever they want to be. But that history does not need to be "cleansed" to achieve that. Nor should people demand complete control over everyone else's speech. Respectfully letting someone know that you now wish to be called by a different name or pronoun its one thing. Hordes of people angrily attacking people who dared to not say or act exactly in the way they group has just now decided they should is another.
I can relate to some of the points in this article. Whenever I see or hear a friend's deadname I just get completely confused. Saying that "(deadname)" is now "(new name)" is weird because that's what they've always been. They have always been male and always will be.
Morgan Leigh good
As a general rule you should always call someone what they want to be called, whether it's about gender, religion, titles, etc. Why wouldn't you call someone what they want to be called?
Another honest question because this is not something I've ever personally experienced: Elliot's pronouns are he/they so we wouldn't say "his" as in "his movie Juno" we would say "their movie Juno" is this correct?
... etiquette for .... wow. This brings up the issue of equal rights versus entitlement. So many people protest and march for equal rights for the LGBTQ community and what they seem to not understand is that a lot of those rights are actually privileges. Being confrontational about etiquette is where it starts. At some point, someone is going to be offensive without trying to and someone is going to be super offended just because they can.
How is it privilege to not be referred to by our pronouns, name, and proper gender? We’re just trying to educate people about how to address us. And yeah, there will be someone who’s offended but that’s normal and happens in all spaces.
Right now, in the United States, it's considered a right to be alive. In other places in the world, life is a privilege. In the states, people fight for what they believe are equal rights for LGBTQ. Those rights are actually privileges. Because of the bill of rights, however, everything is miss labeled. Asking to be called something outside the norm is actually asking for respect, acknowledgement outside the norm. A lot of us don't want to extend that respect. Then again, the vast majority of us will never actually deal with these new gender identities.
Darla Johnson haha
So because of what you said... It's okay to be offended all the time and not say anything? But... if someone makes an aumption about your culture you HAVE to stand up for it?
So, did Elliot just force his wife to become straight? Will his wife divorce him now since she's a lesbian and therefore not attracted to him anymore? What gives Elliot the right to force a new sexual identity upon his wife like that?
Ok, I'm ashamed, when my son told me this news, (my son is gay btw) My reaction was terrible and I regret it, I said oh wow what a waste, and I didn't mean it disrespectful, I meant is because I honestly thought he was so gorgeous as a woman, but it obviously came out that way, and I want to apologize to Elliot because I have loved him since he was in the Trailer Park Boys, I think he's amazing as an artist, and this has been a tense time between my 19 year old and I, and am glad that my children's generation is so more aware than we were
Patricia Sloan -
Do as you like but don't get mad at us when we do something wrong in your eyes. And I'll never use they, you might as wel use it. Not about gender(s) but about being a (just 1) person.
How would u like it if someone called u an it.
They would not because it's pretty obvious what I am. An what if someone wanted to be called it? You're also only one person, them/they, or do you suffer from schizophrenia?
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It's X or Y. That's science. Don't ask me to participate in your delusion.
Yeah. People's perception of what normal is changes a ton over time. Which is probably why you shouldn't be it. Or maybe just that being normal doesn't really mean anything because after a while it won't be normal anymore. Who knows what normal will be in the next couple of years.
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Very true. If there was a zombie apocalypse, I'd rather be with the crazy people. I know how they will react. It won't be the worst thing they've ever experienced. It's the normal people you can't trust. You never know when they will go crazy.
What about the people with XXY or XYY? They exist! (even if you don't want to acknowledge the difference between sex and gender)
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Is she one of those people? No. Stupid comment.
Uh...it's usually XX or XY... not X or Y
But anyway here's an upvote since you will likely get downvoted a lot.
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I would hope that was self evident, but apparently I gave you too much credit, and you need the obvious stated or you make dumb comments.
Exactly. Don't ever give me credit for anything. Despite your efforts, I will always make dumb comments because MWA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! As you can guess, I'm a very strange person.
Strange is good. "Normal" people scare the hell out of me.
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As far as the actual psychological issues at play, it used to be called gender identity disorder; now they call it gender dysphoria. The idea that sex or gender is malleable is not true. I’m not denying your humanity if you are a transgender person; I am saying that you are not the sex which you claim to be. You’re still a human being, and you’re a human being with an issue then I wish you Godspeed in dealing with it in any whatever way you see fit, but if you’re going to dictate to me that I’m supposed to pretend, I’m supposed to pretend that men are women and women are men, no. My answer is no. I’m not going to- I’m not going to modify basic biology because it threatens your subjective sense of what you are. - Ben Shapiro
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I'm not asking her to participate in my delusions. I wish her well
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From girl to woman to it. Soon it will be useless to both sexes and the human race. *laughs in 43% suicide rate*
I'll be laughing at ur funeral. I'm they and u will respect others.
No, I'm a human being.
What, you are the Borg?
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As an oppressive member of the patriarchy, Elliot Page needs to admit his guilt and stop trying to insert himself into the limelight...
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Yeah, because history, science, biology, and facts are just suggestions. Don't be a bigot.
"Don't be a bigot"... says the biggest bigot in the comments.
Are you sure you aren't one of the bigots. Actually, don't answer that. You obviously are an idiotic, small-minded bigot.
So...understanding scientific fact is bigotry? Sure.
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who really cares. come out , stay in, change for the good or bad...no one cares...its your life and private..keep it that way
Obviously, a lot of people here cared. Some (including you) didn't like it and expressed it in the comments. Others did like that and expressed it. I just find it kinda ironic that you said no one cares. And I love irony.
Actually, I just really really love irony. :D I have no problem with your opinion. It's an opinion.
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JUST SHUT UP WE ARE TIRED OF U PETER
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lol snowflakes...typical millennial responses
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Or maybe... you could get off your high horse?
It's basic human decency.
Sanjay Dhinsa haha
Sanjay Dhinsa like
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I understood something - I really fancy people who seem in between two genders. They are often so beautiful, so sexy... Maybe that's why I feel sadness and some kind of loss when they start looking very male or very female. I can't understand their decisions and feelings. I find this topic very difficult, complex and tricky.
People aren't transgender for your personal attraction & you absolutely should not be obsessing over strangers' looks to the point of feeling a sense of loss when they change. They change to make *themselves* happy, not disgusting internet randos who call them sexy for just trying to peacefully exist.
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Check out Steph Sanjati. She's more than trans. She has another thing going on too. I forget what it's called. But she's gorgeous.
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Must be a language thing but the "they" usage is kind of pompous as that's a plural. I would never ever use it - "he" instead of "she" (or vice versa), sure...whatever makes you comfortable but the plural one is ridiculous
It's not ridiculous. I can understand it can be confusing for a non-native speaker (such as myself) but it's not *that* weird. Almost anyone knows the saying "to each their own" and it's exactly that. I know it can be confusing but so can be many other language issues, just educate yourself, learn and change your behaviour accordingly.
It's not confusing at all or at least I'm not the one confused about it - a plural is a plural and that's it. Geez talk about some bad rethoric...it's "to each (OF THEM) their own" ....and you're calling me confused?
How is it pompous to use gender neutral pronouns & abide by grammar rules? I think you're just easily offended by completely harmless words. I'd be more than happy to help explain it to you if you weren't so rude & condescending.
You mean "gender neutral plural pronouns" and by all means, call yourself however you like but don't force others to either use forced gramatics or ancient, out of use, forms just because it fits your cause. Hear some non-trans guy publicly referring to himself as "they" and acting all bitchy if others don't do the same and you'll call him a looney bag, but oh noes! If he's a trans it's all OK, he's entitled to whatever his heart desires. We're all equal unless we're "special"
I'm a they so what u gonna do about it
For us non-native speakers it's been hammered into us that "they" and "them" are 3rd person plural. Personally, the only time I heard someone refer to themselves in what I perceive to be a 3rd person/plural pronoun was when Queen Elizabeth uses "we" instead of "I". Hence why I found "they/them" to be super confusing. Hopefully, this is what the other commenter was also referring to. I'm really glad I have finally found a place where I could ask how this works and got an answer from Sleazy Weaver. My language doesn't have gender pronouns, to begin with, and anything gender/orientation/sex-related is rarely if ever discussed. Especially in the presence of women. So all of this is really new to me. But it's an opportunity to learn.
Mihai Daniel Patrichi good
Mihai Daniel Patrichi love
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Sorry not accepting someone who doesn’t accept themselves. Tired of this being forced down our throats. Down arrow away. I don’t care and your hateful comments won’t shame me into changing my mind. It’s a mental illness and no matter how much surgery they get they’ll NEVER be the gender they imagine themselves as.
You are conflating gender, which is a human made label, with biology. We created gender terms and gender norms, thus, anyone can be anything-- we made them, we can undo them. Not being hateful, just trying to help you understand-- no one is saying that they can change sexual biology from birth, that isn't what this is about. If a boy wanted to wear pink all the time, would you tell him not to because pink is for girls? 100 years ago, pink was actually a boys color. We changed that 'rule' -- it really is no different. Gender norms are social constructs. This is basically like changing your name by deed poll, except your gender terms also changed. I'm sorry you feel like its being forced down your throat, but respectably, it's not about you-- because how someone transgender lives their lives doesn't personally affect you at all.
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They will u piece of garbage. U don't know what ur talking about
sorry that comment if for MIhai
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Mental illness should be treated... Not embraced.
So are you getting treatment for yours then?
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He does not have a mental illness. Different beliefs than yours are not mental illnesses...
Ryan Delaney Good response!
Ryan Delaney love
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Does this mean Elliott will only play trans roles going forward? Because fairness? Or..............Does that not apply here? Asking for a friend. (Asking for myself).
I think they will play the roles they want to play. Is it really important for a movie role what’s going on on the inside of a person? Can’t gay people play straight people anymore? Can’t 35-year-olds play 40-year-olds anymore? Can’t parents play non-parents anymore?
No, you can only play what you were born, hollywood will have to genetically engineer fairies, elves, trolls, werewolves, etc. to stay in business.
xiaomiao yes
What's interesting though is that when it's proposed that a straight person plays a gay role there is kick back, and when a non-trans actor plays a trans person there is a kick back, so it works in some directions but not others.
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The whole "trans" card has been overplayed already. It's yesterday's news. "Trans" now is what "gay" was 20 years ago. It's been overdone to the point where if you come out or go transgender, people are like..."ok, who isn't?" At the end of the day, you can't change your chromosomal makeup. A man can wear a dress, or a woman can wear a fake rubber dildo, but you will always, no matter what, be the gender you were chromosomally given, complain all you want, it's science.
You are correct. You cannot change your chromosonal makeup. But scientists have recognised for years that gender and sex are not the same thing and are dictated by different things in the body. If you want to root your point in science, what you should have said is that "you will always be the sex you were chromosomally given". Gender is not defined by your chromosomes but my more social and mental factors, which is why sometimes sex and gender do not align and can cause gender dysphoria. As it has been said, sex is what's between your legs, gender is what's between your ears. The research into gender is actually fascinating and I will always reccomend it to those who want to make transphobic comments like yours that claim to be scientific.
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And 99% of the population couldn't give a toss one way or the other.
It’s okay not to care, but it’s important to a lot of people. Trans people almost never see themselves and media and with every actor/actress that comes out, they get the opportunity to maybe see themselves for a moment on screen. They see themselves with a star studded job. They see themselves given accolades and credited in movies. they see someone who has broken the mold and has become successful. And that’s very motivating for a trans person. Especially when they are at the highest risk of homicide, homelessness, hate crimes, and suicide.
Totally agree, but my issue with people going out of their way to say "dnt care" is that they made a specific effort to say it. You don't get these comments on any article that isn't about LGBT issues. If you aren't interested, you don't click on the article. These people claim 'not to care' because they believe that the issues are being, to quote a well-known phrase, "shoved down their throats". I can perhaps get that because, in a perfect world, basic human rights should not be an issue. What is interesting is that half of these people actively seek out these articles just so they can add their statement of "I Don't Care". You obviously do care if you went out of your way to click and comment. It isn't shoved in your face- you've actively sought it out so that you can complain.
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PotatoNinja5000 -
The problem is people care too much. I think this is mildly interesting. It’s surprising. I don’t know much about this person or their films but I’ve seen them on TV. It’s neat in a way and that’s pretty much it. Like there’s not a lot of ways to “care” about a story like this but it’s interesting enough to read about.
I think you're wrong. You don't have to be trans, or gay, or disabled, or part of any traditionally maltreated section of society to want to know how to do better at interacting with people who are. The number of trans people is very small, but the number of people who want to know how to interact with trans people respectfully is much larger. And I think that's a good thing.
Patty O'Heater lol
Patty O'Heater like
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I miss the good old days when homosexuality was properly diagnosed and treated as a mental disorder.
Well, f*ck you too!
@ Colin Bayler: Yeah, and I miss "the good old days" when hateful trolls got lobotomies...
@Colin Bayler, f*ck off. Are you sure you don't have a disease called "stupidity?" Wait, don't answer that. I know you do. You're a stupid little a**hole.
@Anthony I hope you have a happy life together!
Yeah, I like now, when I might be able to marry my future girlfriend.
Colin Bayler Good response!
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Colin Bayler lol
It's not funny. Both of you disgust me
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I know this person as Vanya
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lailyfnoor +
Remember how you sometimes see a pet and say, "What a cute boy!" and the owner says, "It's actually a girl." And you say to the pet, "Aren't you a cute girl? Yes, you are!" Boom. It's as easy as that.
THAT IS THE PERFECT WAY TO DESCRIBE IT!
Basic trans etiquette = everyone's etiquette = realising it's not about other people fitting into your world but that you coexist with about 7 or 8 billion others who are all different - not just you - and all the same, so just get on with it and stop trying to dictate to everyone.
Yes, but in that case it actually is a girl. It's correcting a mistake that you made, not forcing one.
the sad thing is, people feel bad about misgendering someones pet but not other people, sadly i've already seen people use his (elliots) deadname, its been 1 day