Woman Online Acknowledges How Badly Her Life Changed After The Birth Of Her Baby, Revealing That It Was The Worst Mistake Of Her Life
It’s well-known that being a parent is a hard thing to do and it seems that no matter how well one tries to prepare for it, it still comes as a challenge. A challenge that might bring a new mother to a point where she starts to regret her decision. Very often we might see happy parents who love to share their little but important achievements and new discoveries. But there are two sides to the coin. This other side might not be that fun and wholesome. Proof of this could be a post shared on Mumsnet by a new mom who decided to confess that having a baby was “the worst mistake of her life.” This bold statement was accompanied by an elaborate explanation of why the woman feels that way and a discussion of other moms who were quick to share how they felt after giving birth and providing words of encouragement to the new mom.
Being a new parent is as exciting as it is challenging and even scary
Image credits: Candace Nast
The woman shared that she hates being a mom because she doesn’t have time for herself, feeling that she has no life. She continued by revealing what every day looks like for her, adding details such as that she has to wake up at 6 to go to work, after which she goes to the nursery to pick up her baby and then go home. Once she’s back, she tries to spend some quality time with the child, bathe and prepare them for bed. And then when the night comes, the woman only gets a few hours of sleep because the baby keeps waking up. “Wake up for day at 6. Feel like a zombie. Repeat,” the mom concluded her daily routine.
Woman online decided to share how she finds being a new mom tiring to the point where she thinks that having a baby was a mistake
Image credits: Overthecamelhump
A lot of other moms in the comments admitted that the first two years of a baby’s life are quite hard on parents, especially if they are taking care of the kid all by themselves. The commentators assumed that the mom is alone in this situation and encouraged her to seek help from her family members or friends. Some tried to calm down the author of the post by stating that this is temporary and that once their child is older, despite other challenges, it will get easier.
The woman revealed how draining her everyday life has become after she had a baby, stating that now she doesn’t feel like she has a life of her own
Image credits: Marco Verch Professional P
Image credits: Overthecamelhump
It might seem shocking to hear that a parent regrets having their kid or even admits to sometimes hating them. This is not a very frequent occurrence, as people are much more pleased to look at smiling parents and their well-dressed and well-behaved kids posing for a photo that then ends up on social media. And parents who even allow themselves to think that way frequently suppress their feelings, because how dare they think badly about their offspring?
This confession on a parenting news site started a discussion where moms shared their own thoughts on the matter
Image credits: EmilySalazar
According to Better Help, a platform that provides mental health services, parents shouldn’t be scared to admit that they feel hatred. It’s important to not suppress your feelings or push those bad thoughts away. Sometimes putting more thought into it helps one to understand whether you’re actually mad at your child or maybe there are other things that make your life harder. Once you understand why you feel this way, it’s easier to find solutions that help to improve your well-being and relationship with your kid.
Users online agreed that being a mom for the first two years is a huge challenge and shared their own experiences as well as words of sympathy for the new mom
Sometimes parents hate to admit that they don’t like their children because of their crippled relationship with them. How many times have we witnessed a kid who would scream their lungs out in the middle of a store to the point where the parent seems just ignorant of the whole situation? According to the article by Better Help, Sometimes I Feel Like I Hate My Child: Am I A Bad Parent?, in cases like these, it’s important to understand what it is that makes you upset with your child and how you can change it, stressing that there is nothing wrong with talking about it with someone else and addressing these issues. We all have troubled relationships with various people in our lives and going through some struggles with your kid is a normal experience.
Users online recommended that this woman get some extra help as it’s hard to work and take care of a baby all by yourself
It’s crucial to understand that as a parent, you’re helping another human being to become a person with their own thoughts, needs, desires, and wishes. So once they start to express themselves and their ideas, these might clash with your opinions, causing arguments and distress. What a lot of parents forget is that even if you wish to provide your child with the best things in life, it’s important to not forget yourself and your needs.
What do you think about this matter? Don’t forget to leave your thoughts in the comments down below!
The post encouraged other mothers to reveal the truth about parenting and share their own experiences
It IS really hard. The hardest, most draining thing ever. But I DO think "what did she expect?"
That's not really fair...nothing at all could've prepared me for how hard it actually is. People can tell you how hard it is, but until you're in it, you really don't know. We don't know what kind of support system she has, or if she's suffering from PPD, etc. Some of my friends had easy babies and breezed through it, others had colicky babies and really struggled. Both of my babies were completely different experiences for me.
Load More Replies...
Sleep deprivation is literally torture. I hope this mom is able to find some support. Also this is why a decent length maternity (or parental) leave us so crucial.
Absolutely… it’s the most critical time for mom and baby to have adequate support.
Load More Replies...
Yo. You get to bring your baby to a nursery. My daily routine is navigating a 1 year old climbing on my shoulders while I am speaking to my boss via Microsoft teams. Thank god I don't have to open camera though. That being said, I would not trade this away despite how hard it is.
It's okay, nobody but psychos enjoy those first years of sleep deprivation, healing from birthing trauma, and being a 24/7 caregiver to a screaming tiny alien. It will not always be this way. My kids were like that too and I hated it. Eventually they went to daycare(when we could afford it) and 6 hrs without having to care for them really helps. Now they're 7,9 and make food for themselves, play video games, have interesting chats, use the br by themselves lol and make jokes at us. They're people now and parenting is a lot more enjoyable
Anyone who says they never thought about smacking a kid upside their fat head, is someone who does not have kids.
Think about giving it away. Wrap it up in a blanket, put it in a basket, add some formula and some clothes and put the basket in front of a church or social center or something. HOLD UP! If that thought makes your toenails curl up ... then congratulations. You are a great parent. Hang in there, it'll get better. Consider taking a vacation day where you put the baby in daycare and treat yourself to a me-day (which will involve lots of sleeping)
My parents never told me how difficult was to be parents, cause complaining would mean they were bad parents, so new mothers nowadays compainig about that = I'm not a bad mom/dad/person but before you have one, be prepared for the worst. Glad to see people aknowlege this.
Yeah it's flipping hard. But if what you're doing isn't working, why aren't you trying other solutions? My 9 month old was having horrible nights--let it go for 3 nights, then found what was wrong. Separation anxiety, which is normal at that age. Put a twin mattress on the floor next to my side of the bed and bam, magic. She sleeps 9 hrs. The internet is full of resources. If one thing doesn't work, try another, until life is bearable. Don't just keep suffering bc someone told you it has to be done one certain way and that way isn't working. Find your own path
Exactly this, babies are trial and error 😂 my daughter slept amazing with whitenoise on YouTube! Mostly vacuum noises 😂
Load More Replies...
😂 I waited until I retired from the Army... it's not hard at all 😂🤣
If only more people would actually consider if it's good idea to procreate before they do it these things could probably be avoided
My first baby was so hard and would not sleep! I thought I made a mistake at first too. But we found our groove and we had a second baby. It was much easier for multiple reasons but I think one of the main reasons I was already in 'Mom' mode so there wasn't a major lifestyle change. Hang in there!
I kind of forgot about how hard it was to have an infant. My kid is 4 now, and sometimes I see a little baby and feel all wistful. But I forgot about the sleep deprivation and the hundred-and-fifty-percent that's demanded of you in the beginning. Now I'm thinking, "I'm good with my preschooler!"
I had a brother 10 years younger than me. I changed his nappies, bathed him, fed him, etc. and it taught me that a baby is a lot of monotonous work. Fast forward 40 years and that experience told me that I didn’t want kids and my wife and I haven’t. Who needs the grief?
You will get your life back. It's just a baby not a monster. Honestly you seem really self centered and immature.
Sadly there often isn't enough support for single parents, emotional or practical. If you truly have made a mistake, and you do not want this child, adoption is an option. If your child is young enough (usually less than 30 days) safe haven surrender is usually anonymous, and easy. If they're older than the limit in your location, then private adoption is your best bet. If you can't do this, and you don't want to do this, then an adoption agency will offer you counselling and tell you your options. Not keeping a baby doesn't make you an a*****e. If you want this baby, but you just can't cope, ask for help. If you don't have family or friends who can help, ask your GP if there are any resources for mothers with PPD that you can access.
I went looking for all those wonderful resources for mothers with PPD, when I was so overwhelmed with sleep deprivation and depression that I was hallucinating and suicidal. I have excellent health insurance and excellent access to medical care. My GP said she could not help me with my insomnia (postpartum anxiety, as I learned later, but I didn't know it then). Just flat out told me "I can't help you." I tried to get some sort of mental health help - mind you, I was suicidal and in charge of a baby. I got a list of 20 therapists or so, none of whom were accepting new patients. That was it. I made it through the hard time, but it was no thanks to them. My heart breaks for the mothers who were offered the same "help" and who didn't make it.
Load More Replies... When I was baby sitting I decided kids were NOT for me. EVER! Want a reality check before kids happen -- sit with someone's baby for a long weekend, a long holiday or while they go on vacation. And all these commercials and movies showing babies will NEVER drive home the reality of 24/7. I even quit dating men who had shared custody of a baby/kid -- they automatically thought every woman would be a FREE sitter while they did something else. And if High School would have that program where kids took a doll that cried and wet every few hours, they would re-consider EVER making out, much less say they are ready to marry and procreate. Can people actually consider the reality of life if they are only on the phone or watching TV. Can't sympathize with anyone who chose what they are doing. These are supposed to be adults -- act like it.
It IS really hard. The hardest, most draining thing ever. But I DO think "what did she expect?"
That's not really fair...nothing at all could've prepared me for how hard it actually is. People can tell you how hard it is, but until you're in it, you really don't know. We don't know what kind of support system she has, or if she's suffering from PPD, etc. Some of my friends had easy babies and breezed through it, others had colicky babies and really struggled. Both of my babies were completely different experiences for me.
Load More Replies... Sleep deprivation is literally torture. I hope this mom is able to find some support. Also this is why a decent length maternity (or parental) leave us so crucial.
Absolutely… it’s the most critical time for mom and baby to have adequate support.
Load More Replies... Yo. You get to bring your baby to a nursery. My daily routine is navigating a 1 year old climbing on my shoulders while I am speaking to my boss via Microsoft teams. Thank god I don't have to open camera though. That being said, I would not trade this away despite how hard it is.
It's okay, nobody but psychos enjoy those first years of sleep deprivation, healing from birthing trauma, and being a 24/7 caregiver to a screaming tiny alien. It will not always be this way. My kids were like that too and I hated it. Eventually they went to daycare(when we could afford it) and 6 hrs without having to care for them really helps. Now they're 7,9 and make food for themselves, play video games, have interesting chats, use the br by themselves lol and make jokes at us. They're people now and parenting is a lot more enjoyable
Anyone who says they never thought about smacking a kid upside their fat head, is someone who does not have kids.
Think about giving it away. Wrap it up in a blanket, put it in a basket, add some formula and some clothes and put the basket in front of a church or social center or something. HOLD UP! If that thought makes your toenails curl up ... then congratulations. You are a great parent. Hang in there, it'll get better. Consider taking a vacation day where you put the baby in daycare and treat yourself to a me-day (which will involve lots of sleeping)
My parents never told me how difficult was to be parents, cause complaining would mean they were bad parents, so new mothers nowadays compainig about that = I'm not a bad mom/dad/person but before you have one, be prepared for the worst. Glad to see people aknowlege this.
Yeah it's flipping hard. But if what you're doing isn't working, why aren't you trying other solutions? My 9 month old was having horrible nights--let it go for 3 nights, then found what was wrong. Separation anxiety, which is normal at that age. Put a twin mattress on the floor next to my side of the bed and bam, magic. She sleeps 9 hrs. The internet is full of resources. If one thing doesn't work, try another, until life is bearable. Don't just keep suffering bc someone told you it has to be done one certain way and that way isn't working. Find your own path
Exactly this, babies are trial and error 😂 my daughter slept amazing with whitenoise on YouTube! Mostly vacuum noises 😂
Load More Replies... 😂 I waited until I retired from the Army... it's not hard at all 😂🤣
If only more people would actually consider if it's good idea to procreate before they do it these things could probably be avoided
My first baby was so hard and would not sleep! I thought I made a mistake at first too. But we found our groove and we had a second baby. It was much easier for multiple reasons but I think one of the main reasons I was already in 'Mom' mode so there wasn't a major lifestyle change. Hang in there!
I kind of forgot about how hard it was to have an infant. My kid is 4 now, and sometimes I see a little baby and feel all wistful. But I forgot about the sleep deprivation and the hundred-and-fifty-percent that's demanded of you in the beginning. Now I'm thinking, "I'm good with my preschooler!"
I had a brother 10 years younger than me. I changed his nappies, bathed him, fed him, etc. and it taught me that a baby is a lot of monotonous work. Fast forward 40 years and that experience told me that I didn’t want kids and my wife and I haven’t. Who needs the grief?
You will get your life back. It's just a baby not a monster. Honestly you seem really self centered and immature.
Sadly there often isn't enough support for single parents, emotional or practical. If you truly have made a mistake, and you do not want this child, adoption is an option. If your child is young enough (usually less than 30 days) safe haven surrender is usually anonymous, and easy. If they're older than the limit in your location, then private adoption is your best bet. If you can't do this, and you don't want to do this, then an adoption agency will offer you counselling and tell you your options. Not keeping a baby doesn't make you an a*****e. If you want this baby, but you just can't cope, ask for help. If you don't have family or friends who can help, ask your GP if there are any resources for mothers with PPD that you can access.
I went looking for all those wonderful resources for mothers with PPD, when I was so overwhelmed with sleep deprivation and depression that I was hallucinating and suicidal. I have excellent health insurance and excellent access to medical care. My GP said she could not help me with my insomnia (postpartum anxiety, as I learned later, but I didn't know it then). Just flat out told me "I can't help you." I tried to get some sort of mental health help - mind you, I was suicidal and in charge of a baby. I got a list of 20 therapists or so, none of whom were accepting new patients. That was it. I made it through the hard time, but it was no thanks to them. My heart breaks for the mothers who were offered the same "help" and who didn't make it.
Load More Replies... When I was baby sitting I decided kids were NOT for me. EVER! Want a reality check before kids happen -- sit with someone's baby for a long weekend, a long holiday or while they go on vacation. And all these commercials and movies showing babies will NEVER drive home the reality of 24/7. I even quit dating men who had shared custody of a baby/kid -- they automatically thought every woman would be a FREE sitter while they did something else. And if High School would have that program where kids took a doll that cried and wet every few hours, they would re-consider EVER making out, much less say they are ready to marry and procreate. Can people actually consider the reality of life if they are only on the phone or watching TV. Can't sympathize with anyone who chose what they are doing. These are supposed to be adults -- act like it.
30
34