Swathika Venkatesan
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Swathika Venkatesan • upvoted 32 items 8 months ago
Dark Jokes
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you were adopted.
Dark Jokes
I've asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.Dark Jokes
I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.
Dark Jokes
Turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.Dark Jokes
I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.” So we stopped playing chess.
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I'd like to have kids one day. I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
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A guy walks with a young boy into the woods. The boy turns to him and says, "Hey mister, it's getting really dark and I'm scared." The man replies, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."
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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm.
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A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend." The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better." "Thanks Dad," the son says. The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."Dark Jokes
My son, who's into astronomy, asked me how stars die. "Usually an overdose, son," I told him.
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I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.Dark Jokes
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
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Swathika Venkatesan • upvoted 8 items 9 months ago
Dark Jokes
Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
Dark Jokes
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Dark Jokes
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
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A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. "You can't cut me down," the tree complains. "I'm a talking tree!" The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."
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As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
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Swathika Venkatesan • commented on a post 9 months ago
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Swathika Venkatesan • upvoted 20 items 8 months ago
Dark Jokes
What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm.Dark Jokes
Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.Dark Jokes
I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.” So we stopped playing chess.Dark Jokes
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.Dark Jokes
My son, who's into astronomy, asked me how stars die. "Usually an overdose, son," I told him.Dark Jokes
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.Dark Jokes
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you were adopted.This Panda hasn't followed anyone yet
Swathika Venkatesan • 32 followers
