Mary Peace
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This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself.
Mary Peace • commented on 12 posts 1 day ago
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Mary Peace • upvoted 2 items 1 day ago
Mary Peace • upvoted 8 items 2 days ago
Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Two ppl are arguing abt Orion’s Belt. One says it’s just a waist of space *badum tiss* I’m sorry that joke is only a 3 star.Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Shall I tell you the joke about the empty house? No, there's nothing in it Shall I tell you the joke about the body snatchers? No, you might get carried awayHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
This is a long one.... Three workers sit down for lunch. They all open their lunch boxes and groan. 'oh no' says the first one, 'not cheese again!' 'oh no!' says the second one 'not honey again!' 'oh no' says the third one 'not marmite again!' The next day, they open their lunches, and it's the same again. this time, they all decide that, if they have the same again tomorrow, they're all running away. The day after, they all have the same sandwiches again, and all run away. The next day, their partners meet up to comisserate. 'Its my fault' said the first one's partner ' that was one cheese sandwich too many.' 'Its my fault.' said the second one's partner ' that was one honey sandwich too many' 'I don't know what happened' said the third ones partner 'he made his own lunches!' **Apologies for the clunky phrasing, the original was quite sexistShow All 8 Upvotes
Mary Peace • upvoted 9 items 3 days ago
Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
A dung beetle walks into a bar. Looks around and decides to leave. All the stools were taken.Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What do you call a well-dressed fish? So-fish-ticated!Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Kid: "dad I'm hungry" Dad:"I'm Austria the country nextdoor" Kid:"How long until dinner" Dad:"about 3 and a half foot" Kid:"Am I adopted?" Dad:"if I had a choice do you reckon I'd would've picked you?" These are all joke my dad says lolHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Three pieces of string walk into a bar. The first piece of string goes up and asks for three beers. The barkeep says. “Are you a piece of string?” The String replies “yes” “Sorry… we don’t serve string here.” The second piece of string tries his luck. “Are you a piece of string?” “Yes…” “Sorry, we don’t serve string here.” Before the third piece of string goes up to the bar, he goes into the restroom and twists himself up and one end and fluffs out his edges. He goes up to the bar and asks “Can I have three beers please” The Barkeep eyes him suspiciously. “Are you a piece of string?” “No… I’m a frayed knot”
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Mary Peace • upvoted 8 items 4 days ago
Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! *say it like its absolutely hilarious, and then a minute or so later say...* Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken!!!Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What's the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth hurty.Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What happened to the boy eating cherry pie? he was caught red handed What do you call the vegan superhero? Iron deficiency man Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth, then it's a soap operaHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
A priest, a minister and a rabbit walk into a bar. The rabbit looks at the others and says "I think I'm a typo."Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
My Dad would say before a dance You can dance cheek to cheek or turn around and face each otherShow All 8 Upvotes
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Mary Peace • submitted a list addition 1 day ago
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Mary Peace • upvoted 20 items 1 day ago
Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Two conspiracy theorists walk into a bar. Coincidence? I think not...Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Two ppl are arguing abt Orion’s Belt. One says it’s just a waist of space *badum tiss* I’m sorry that joke is only a 3 star.Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Hey, did you know male bees die after mating? So their whole life is Honey, Nut, Cheerio.Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Shall I tell you the joke about the empty house? No, there's nothing in it Shall I tell you the joke about the body snatchers? No, you might get carried awayHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
This is a long one.... Three workers sit down for lunch. They all open their lunch boxes and groan. 'oh no' says the first one, 'not cheese again!' 'oh no!' says the second one 'not honey again!' 'oh no' says the third one 'not marmite again!' The next day, they open their lunches, and it's the same again. this time, they all decide that, if they have the same again tomorrow, they're all running away. The day after, they all have the same sandwiches again, and all run away. The next day, their partners meet up to comisserate. 'Its my fault' said the first one's partner ' that was one cheese sandwich too many.' 'Its my fault.' said the second one's partner ' that was one honey sandwich too many' 'I don't know what happened' said the third ones partner 'he made his own lunches!' **Apologies for the clunky phrasing, the original was quite sexistHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Him: why did the chicken cross the street? Me: idk why? Him: To get the Chinese Newspaper! … do you get it? Me: No Him: Me neither, I get the (insert local newspaper)Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What do you call a well-dressed fish? So-fish-ticated!Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What happened to the boy eating cherry pie? he was caught red handed What do you call the vegan superhero? Iron deficiency man Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth, then it's a soap operaHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Are you freezing? Go to the corner there it is 90 degreesHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What do you call a ship that lies at the bottom of the sea and shivers......... A nervous wreck.Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Why was the worker fired from the orange juice factory? He couldn’t concentrateHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What do mice use to floss their teeth? String cheese! (I work for a dental office)Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Kid: "dad I'm hungry" Dad:"I'm Austria the country nextdoor" Kid:"How long until dinner" Dad:"about 3 and a half foot" Kid:"Am I adopted?" Dad:"if I had a choice do you reckon I'd would've picked you?" These are all joke my dad says lolHey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Three pieces of string walk into a bar. The first piece of string goes up and asks for three beers. The barkeep says. “Are you a piece of string?” The String replies “yes” “Sorry… we don’t serve string here.” The second piece of string tries his luck. “Are you a piece of string?” “Yes…” “Sorry, we don’t serve string here.” Before the third piece of string goes up to the bar, he goes into the restroom and twists himself up and one end and fluffs out his edges. He goes up to the bar and asks “Can I have three beers please” The Barkeep eyes him suspiciously. “Are you a piece of string?” “No… I’m a frayed knot”Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What did the hyena say when she saw the five elephants coming up the hill? "here comes the five elephants up the hill !" What did the hyena say when she saw the five elephants coming up with sunglasses ? Nothing, she didn't recognize them.Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! *say it like its absolutely hilarious, and then a minute or so later say...* Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken!!!Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Bad Dad Joke?
What's the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth hurty.This Panda hasn't followed anyone yet
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