
Night Owl
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Night Owl • commented on 5 posts 1 day ago

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Night Owl • upvoted 5 items 1 week ago

mind-blowing-statistics
20% OR MORE of pregnancies end in miscarriage. 20% is just "known pregnancies" and doesn't take into account all the women who just think "oh, my period was a day late, weird" without realizing they've actually had a very early miscarriage. That is stunningly high compared to what we've been led to believe. If you think of all the women you know who either have or have tried to have children, there's an excellent chance that several of them have had a miscarriage before. When you realize exactly how common it is, it makes it that much more sad that it is so stigmatized. If we talked about it more, maybe it wouldn't catch so many people off guard.
Hey Pandas, What's Your Gossip Of The Day?
Gossip has it that USA took a 50 year step into the past today. I weep for them....
LemmeLaroo reply
Things are going to keep getting worse on our planet and we are in for some serious human tragedy.
corrado33 reply
"You can achieve anything you put your mind to" is NOT true. Not even close. Genetics play a HUGE role in whether or not someone will be a good athlete, or a super successful scientist. Can you be an "OK" athlete if you try really hard and practice really hard? Sure. Will you break world records or play for a professional team? No. You have to be especially gifted in the genetics department to do those sorts of things. The same thing applies for mental pursuits. Not everyone is smart. Some people just don't... get it. You can try a million different ways of teaching a subject and some people just... won't... get it. Critical thinking (the ability to see a problem and visualize how to get a solution) comes MUCH MORE EASILY to some people than to others. Can you sit there and memorize things and get good grades and what not? Absolutely. Will you ever be a scientist who does extremely important research and solves the world's next huge problem? Probably not, unless you get hired because of nepotism are dragged along by someone who IS good at critical thinking. Furthermore, much of what you CAN do is limited by who you know. If you're rich or your parents are rich and they know lots of people and have a large social network or a lot of people who want to please them for one reason or another, you'll likely find a job in whatever career you want to extremely easily provided you're not totally inept. If you're the first in your family to get a degree and aren't good at maintaining a social network you'll likely have an extremely hard time finding a job, even if you are the person best suited for the jobs you are applying for. Even if the job you're applying for is LITERALLY what you spent 5 years getting a PhD on, if you don't know somebody, you likely won't get that job.
Night Owl • upvoted 2 items 2 weeks ago

Night Owl • upvoted 7 items 3 weeks ago

People-Share-Shocking-Family-Secrets
I was adopted by the man I always knew as 'Dad'. I was always asked "did you think of him differently after you found out?" My response has and always will be yes. I respect him a hell of a lot more than I ever did before.
reasons-people-dislike-their-children
I am 42 and have 3 kids, 21, 17 and 5. I love them more than anything and would die to save them if I had to. But they are people with their own personalities and there are days when I really don't like them. The 2 older girls teenage years were filled with these days. What most new parents don't understand is that kids are not a blank slate that you get to draw on. Each child has their own personality and while you can guide and shape their views and attitudes, you just can't change who they are. That can lead to times when you don't like them. Don't feel bad or guilty about it, its natural but nobody talks about it. Understand them, Talk to them and above all Love them. When you see something you don't like, do what you feel is right as a parent. If its serious enough that it needs adjustment, work with them. If its something small, let them be their own person.
The Bullying Never Stops, Or Does It?
Once when I was a kid I invited a kid that I bullied horribly over to my house for a sleepover because I was told I had to do something nice for someone I hurt by our priest during confession (I went to a catholic school). The next day after a pretty boring night we were playing in the snow banks and I lied telling him my foot was stuck and I couldn't get it out, he ran well over a mile back to my house to get my mom to "save" me... well that kind of woke me up and made me realize "this kid isn't that bad." After that day I never bullied anyone again, and 20 years later that turd that I bullied so terribly is still my best friend, was the best man at my wedding, and the godfather of my first child.
The 1% Gallon Of Milk Says It All
My girlfriend and I used to buy milk at the 7-11 across the street from our apt, because for whatever reason their gallons of 1% were always a dollar cheaper than the grocery store. Reza, The young middle eastern guy who managed the store got to know us fairly well, in that we would always greet eachother and occasionally if he saw their stocks of 1% gallons running low he would store one in the back for us because he knew we would always come in at like 2 pm every Sunday for milk. Really nice guy. The week before we took a vacation, the girlfriend was studying her a*s off for her exam, so I did the grocery shopping alone. Because we were leaving mid week for our trip, I only bought a half gallon of milk. Of f*****g course Reza assumes the worst. He assumes that we've broken up. He asked where she was and I just kind of grumbled, ready to launch into explaining how her test was tomorrow and whatnot, but before I could he just launched into this whole big apology like he didn't realize and how he just got divorced and how he misses her every day....I just didn't have the heart to tell him that she was just busy today, and that we were leaving for the week so I just went with it. I didn't want my gf to think I was a s**tbird, so I neglected to tell her when I got home. Two weeks later, (coincidentally the gf is busy working a weekend shift to make up for our week off) I go back in, grab a gallon of 1%, and quickly realize that looks bad, so I turn around, put the gallon back, and grabbed the half gallon. The whole time Reza is watching me, dejectedly. He starts telling me it gets better, hang in there, we can grab coffee if I want to talk. I politely decline, and quickly realize this lie is going to spiral out of control real fast. I think I told the gf that they were out of gallons and Reza didn't save us one this week. In the ensuing weeks, I proceeded to make all efforts to buy milk when the gf wasn't around. She still didn't know. I "decided to start working out", so I was able to justify to Reza the purchase of a gallon of 1%. We would normally chat for a few minutes and we would ask each other how things were and We would both give vague answers and wish each other well and be on our way. Eventually, one day the gf goes to 7-11 on her own when I wasn't around. I guess Reza helped her, made small talk, but was definitely weird towards her. She texts me about it and at this point I knew the jig was up and I had to come clean. When I get home I explain everything to her, and she laughs, calls me an idiot, but at the same time thought it was cute for me to keep up the facade and commiserate with Reza, who was clearly dealing with some of his own issues. She decided that we needed to stage a reunion. So the following Sunday, we waltzed in, arm in arm, looking cheery. We could feel his eyes following us around the room, I made eye contact with him once or twice, he was trying desperately and failing to hold back the biggest knowing grin I've ever seen. Finally we go to check out and he starts wringing his hands and finally bursts out about he was rooting for us and how happy he was that we worked it out. The look of excitement and happiness on Reza's face was probably one of the most uplifting moments I've ever had. He told us repeatedly how we give him hope and how not the whole world is evil... holy c**p. Glad we could help you Reza, sorry I lied about the milk.
Night Owl • upvoted an item 4 weeks ago

Night Owl • upvoted 4 items 1 month ago

Hey LGBTQ+ Pandas, In Honor Of Pride Month, How Did You Come Out?
I came out in 1983 at 12 years old, at the beginning of the AIDS crisis and when the social stigma & bigotry was rampant. I was much more lucky than most, because I grew up in San Francisco in Eureka Valley, which the Castro is part of. Most of our neighbors were m/m couples and I had about 50 “uncles” or family friends. My mother was a charge nurse for the AIDS ward. Because of union rules & lack of understanding of the disease, nurses to custodians had to volunteer and couldn’t be made to. My brothers, friends and other shops it’s employees families took care of the cleaning of the ward (think huge room with 100 beds separated by curtains) and visiting with patients. Several we knew from ‘hood. I didn’t come fro ma conservative family or environment, but no one wished or reveled on me coming out because the immediate fears were AIDS & “fåg-bashing.” My naive understanding at the time of what “gay” meant was all stereotype. Queens & drag queens & clones. I somehow didn’t equate my attraction to other boys as gay or queer. I just thought I liked buys and I never hid it. I had a boyfriend and we were glued to each other’s side. About a year into our relationship we were at a skate park and some girls were chatting us up. I was clueless, but my bf knew they were hitting on us. He said, “you know we’re gay, right?” and it rang/echoed in my head. It was a cathartic moment for me to realize my attraction solely to guys and my relationship was what “gay” meant and what I was. Not the tank tops and short shorts or the campy attitude I knew from so many. I had a massive paradigm shift that destroyed my aloofness and realized so very much that I seemed to overlook about myself & my community. That night, all 12 of us were camped out in the family room eating pizza and watching tv. My 5 brothers, each of their best friends and my two sisters (who were actually my friends and lived with us because of family issues) and I asked my folks to join us. I said I had to make a big announcement. I stood up and said, “just so you all know. I’m gay and Jason is my boyfriend.” Pretty much everyone responded with joking laughs or “duh.” I said, “so wait, you all know?” & my 8yo brother said, “Hello! We live with you.” My stepfather pondered whether we’d ever openly talked about it. He assumed we had. It was obvious. A given. While my mother was happy I felt ok to say it, but mostly that I was being less introverted and quiet about myself. I know how privilege, blessed and lucky I was. Because SF has been a Mecca for queer kids for decades. In the 80s, LGBTQ+ homeless youth were everywhere and I made friends with plenty. My parents had a foster license because of their jobs and they adopted one of my brothers. During my teens we had 11 queer foster siblings, three which lived with us to adulthood & are part of our family. I’ve sat witness to the horrors and abuse so many queer youth has to escape. I’ve seen the suicide ideation. The self-medication. The self-harm or reckless behavior. The lack of resources, agency, access. I had it easy. These kids, the ones before them & the ones before them are the shoulders that todays queer youth stand on. They’re the ones that first fought to survive and fought for visibility, representation & inclusion. You know, the fight we still have to fight today.
Hey LGBTQ+ Pandas, In Honor Of Pride Month, How Did You Come Out?
I never did. I believe that sexuality is a continuous and not categories and people might move in that scale. I prefer men but sometimes feel atracted to women. As I only dated two people and they were both men my family and most people considers me hetero. If i would ever date a woman I would just introduce her. But I do not think that its something to reveal, just part of me.
PuffinStuffinMuffins reply
Being environmentally conscious. You’d be surprised with how much overlap there is between frugal and sustainable living. It’s the mindset more than anything else that cuts down my expenses. I buy second hand. Catch public transport. Gone vegetarian. Bring my own package free snacks. Learned to repair clothes. Compost to feed the garden that feeds me. I use reusable hygiene products (cups and safety razors). I use tea towels instead of paper towels. I use soap bars rather than liquid soaps that come in plastic containers (they last waaay longer). I buy quality clothes/electronics that last longer. I use my library rather than buying physical books. And most importantly, I’ve stopped buying plastic garbage I don’t need.This Panda hasn't followed anyone yet

Night Owl • 143 followers