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Woman Gets Cheated On, Alters Her Wedding Dress To Something Wearable, Sister Can’t Believe It
Interview With Expert
Blood relations aren’t a license to entitlement. It never was, and never will be. Yet, some people seem to subscribe to the notion that they can demand anything from a sibling without repercussions.
This is what two sisters went through after one of them decided to cut up her wedding gown. It was her way to exorcise the ghost of a supposed marriage shattered by infidelity. However, it didn’t sit well with her sister, who called dibs on the dress and took offense because she wasn’t consulted first.
Their argument escalated into a rift, causing their mother to take sides and worsen the situation.
RELATED:
One way to ruin a sibling relationship is by having a sense of entitlement
Image credits: Getty Images / unpslash (not the actual photo)
It happened between two sisters, all because of a wedding dress
Image credits: astrakanimages / envato (not the actual photo)
It ended up causing a rift within the family, and their mother got involved
Image credits: aitaweddingdresscu
Sibling entitlement is a learned behavior primarily shaped by the environment at home
While it does not justify her behavior, the sister’s actions are more a result of her upbringing, specifically the enabling by her parents.
According to licensed psychotherapist and author Christina Steinorth-Powell, parents encourage this kind of attitude, whether they realize it or not.
“They’ve either forgiven the mistreatment the entitled sibling has displayed toward their victim sibling, or they’ve allowed the entitled sibling to act entitled in other ways,” she told Bored Panda.
New Jersey-based psychologist Dr. Carolina Estevez shared a slightly different insight. According to her, the close relationship between siblings often fosters long-lasting habits that can go unchallenged and encourage a sense of entitlement.
Dr. Estevez adds that parents may unintentionally reinforce these behaviors by taking sides, much like the author’s mother seemed to have done.
“Sometimes it’s simply old childhood dynamics playing out long after everyone has grown up,” she stated.
Most experts would advise setting boundaries when dealing with a sibling’s sense of entitlement. However, many people simply don’t know where to begin. Steinorth-Powell provided practical tips, starting with explaining your feelings to eliminate the “he said/she said/they said” dynamic.
She emphasized the importance of addressing behaviors and avoiding bringing up prior infractions, noting that the message must be concise and accurate. And if none of that works, she advises putting things in writing.
“It gives you the opportunity to make sure you’re saying exactly what you want to say, and you’re not leaving anything out.”
Meanwhile, therapist and Balanced Psychotherapy PLLC owner Dallais Bernaix says it all boils down to one important question: “What can I live with in my life?”
“Then work toward setting boundaries. If this becomes too much, seeking support from a licensed mental health professional may be warranted,” she continued.
It doesn’t look like the sister’s entitlement is going away anytime soon. For her sake, the author may want to consider distancing herself from her toxic family, if not cutting ties.
The woman added more information to her story
Many commenters took her side
Others thought everyone had their share of mistakes
And a few people had their reasons why they thought she was being the jerk
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What do you think ?
Lee Gilliland 2 weeks ago
Pretty insensitive to think your sister would enjoy seeing you wear her wedding dress at your wedding.
Tyke 2 weeks ago
^^^ Exactly this! Just want I came to say. Sister is so self-centred. And the YTA's as always are unhinged
Load More Replies...
Ellinor she/they/elle 2 weeks ago (edited)
NTA. It's your dress so you're free to do whatever you want with it. And to the people who said she was the AH for breaking up, I don't want to know what the fùck is wrong with you.
tori Ohno 2 weeks ago
Altering the dress was cathartic and healing for her, and was never offered to her entitled sister. Why would you want to wear your sister's wedding dress anyway? Grandma's dress, okay, but not sister's. And since when is it not cheating because it's the bachelor party? In my almost 60 years, I've never once heard that. Those commenters need to go back to their Mommy's basement.
Load More Replies...
Sarah Kathrin Matsoukis 2 weeks ago
No one but me wears my wedding dress, and especially if it comes with bad memories I'll be d****d to watch someone else have a blast in it. It's full of my emotions, hopes and dreams.
Dusty's mom 2 weeks ago
NTA!!! No, she does NOT owe her sister the dress she bought with her hard-earned cash! Nor does she need the extra helping of heartache as she watches her sister wear said dress. Sounds like a bunch of the YTA crowd are poor relations who think wedding dresses should always be passed down to them. Go to a resale shop!
jasper 1 week ago
The people saying cheating is expected at a bachelor party??? No. No, it's not. If my soon to be husband slept with the s******r, I'd kick his a*s out. I mean, gross. She probably has STDs and yuck. Nope. No thanks.
nm 1 day ago
If someone is in love with his/her partner then he/she is s******y attracted only with that partner and doesn't fack around. There is NO excuse.
Load More Replies...
Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago
Seeing your sister wearing the very symbol of the wedding and life that will now never be yours at HER wedding would be one of the most painful things imaginable. Sister is an insensitive entitled uncaring jerk.
Dusty's mom 2 weeks ago
These idiots who say s-t-r-i-p-p-e-rs don't count don't seem to worry about S-T-Ds. I don't know what kind of bachelor parties are going on out there, but when you risk not only your own health, but the health of the one you promise is your one-and-only, you're cheating. And no, I don't think c-o-n-d-o-m-s should be trusted when everyone is wasted and not thinking with their brains.
Kkg 2 weeks ago
It's not (even) about STDs. What you wrote sounds like if there was a 100% protection against STDs, then cheating during bachelor party would be OK. No - it wouldn't. It's still cheating.
Load More Replies...
KatSaidThat 1 week ago
People saying it's ok to cheat with a s******r should have their spouse cheat on them with one and see if it's still cool then... Enjoy your dress. And you don't need a "special" occasion to wear it - wear it and that day becomes special. Same way you shouldn't save the good silver / champagne - use them and enjoy them. You might not be here tomorrow.
Panda Cat 1 day ago
I made my wedding dress and a big part of it was shopping for the fabric and trim. I think if someone I cared about had asked me to help I’d be fine with making a simple one for them. I had a friend who wore a beautiful dress with no trim, or at least very little. It was a simple cotton jacquard with a fitted bodice and a full skirt and fit her style well. It would take more time to source the fabric than to do the rest. There are plenty of people here who’ve found dresses at thrift stores and online sales forums. Maybe your sister could get one of those and alter it with your help? In trade for something else?
Dove Bradshaw 1 week ago
I want to try the nuts the YTA's are eating, that is some mind altering nuts!
Jessica Daus-Warner 1 week ago
It doesn't matter when someone cheats, only that they have. You are not TA for leaving or dying your dress. It sounds a bit s****y of your sister to assume she can use your dress.
Lee Gilliland 2 weeks ago
Pretty insensitive to think your sister would enjoy seeing you wear her wedding dress at your wedding.
Tyke 2 weeks ago
^^^ Exactly this! Just want I came to say. Sister is so self-centred. And the YTA's as always are unhinged
Load More Replies... Ellinor she/they/elle 2 weeks ago (edited)
NTA. It's your dress so you're free to do whatever you want with it. And to the people who said she was the AH for breaking up, I don't want to know what the fùck is wrong with you.
tori Ohno 2 weeks ago
Altering the dress was cathartic and healing for her, and was never offered to her entitled sister. Why would you want to wear your sister's wedding dress anyway? Grandma's dress, okay, but not sister's. And since when is it not cheating because it's the bachelor party? In my almost 60 years, I've never once heard that. Those commenters need to go back to their Mommy's basement.
Load More Replies... Sarah Kathrin Matsoukis 2 weeks ago
No one but me wears my wedding dress, and especially if it comes with bad memories I'll be d****d to watch someone else have a blast in it. It's full of my emotions, hopes and dreams.
Dusty's mom 2 weeks ago
NTA!!! No, she does NOT owe her sister the dress she bought with her hard-earned cash! Nor does she need the extra helping of heartache as she watches her sister wear said dress. Sounds like a bunch of the YTA crowd are poor relations who think wedding dresses should always be passed down to them. Go to a resale shop!
jasper 1 week ago
The people saying cheating is expected at a bachelor party??? No. No, it's not. If my soon to be husband slept with the s******r, I'd kick his a*s out. I mean, gross. She probably has STDs and yuck. Nope. No thanks.
nm 1 day ago
If someone is in love with his/her partner then he/she is s******y attracted only with that partner and doesn't fack around. There is NO excuse.
Load More Replies... Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago
Seeing your sister wearing the very symbol of the wedding and life that will now never be yours at HER wedding would be one of the most painful things imaginable. Sister is an insensitive entitled uncaring jerk.
Dusty's mom 2 weeks ago
These idiots who say s-t-r-i-p-p-e-rs don't count don't seem to worry about S-T-Ds. I don't know what kind of bachelor parties are going on out there, but when you risk not only your own health, but the health of the one you promise is your one-and-only, you're cheating. And no, I don't think c-o-n-d-o-m-s should be trusted when everyone is wasted and not thinking with their brains.
Kkg 2 weeks ago
It's not (even) about STDs. What you wrote sounds like if there was a 100% protection against STDs, then cheating during bachelor party would be OK. No - it wouldn't. It's still cheating.
Load More Replies... KatSaidThat 1 week ago
People saying it's ok to cheat with a s******r should have their spouse cheat on them with one and see if it's still cool then... Enjoy your dress. And you don't need a "special" occasion to wear it - wear it and that day becomes special. Same way you shouldn't save the good silver / champagne - use them and enjoy them. You might not be here tomorrow.
Panda Cat 1 day ago
I made my wedding dress and a big part of it was shopping for the fabric and trim. I think if someone I cared about had asked me to help I’d be fine with making a simple one for them. I had a friend who wore a beautiful dress with no trim, or at least very little. It was a simple cotton jacquard with a fitted bodice and a full skirt and fit her style well. It would take more time to source the fabric than to do the rest. There are plenty of people here who’ve found dresses at thrift stores and online sales forums. Maybe your sister could get one of those and alter it with your help? In trade for something else?
Dove Bradshaw 1 week ago
I want to try the nuts the YTA's are eating, that is some mind altering nuts!
Jessica Daus-Warner 1 week ago
It doesn't matter when someone cheats, only that they have. You are not TA for leaving or dying your dress. It sounds a bit s****y of your sister to assume she can use your dress.
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