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It's no secret that being a parent is difficult, but that's often just a nice way of describing what the arguably hardest pill to swallow in raising children is — they make everything more challenging.

Forget moving or changing jobs, even if we're talking about basic chores like vacuuming the house and going to the store — our obligations simply demand more effort when we factor in an extra pair of arms and legs we need to constantly be aware of.

However, for whatever reason, many still refuse to accept this universal truth. So a few days ago, writer Lucy Huber tweeted her frustrations about it.

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Huber's, let's call it, rant — I hope she doesn't mind the word — instantly resonated with parents, and it went viral, but the best part is that her tweets also inspired moms and dads to share all the ways their kids overcomplicate everyday life, normalizing the conversation about the reality of it. After all, we can cover our eyes and say whatever words we want, but the issue will remain.

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Kona Pake
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You’re expected there 15 minutes early so you start prepping to leave the house an hour 15 minutes early.

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We managed to get in touch with Lucy Huber and she said the idea to post these thoughts popped into her head while she was attempting to wrangle her two-year-old out the door to his nanny share.

"Every morning we go through the same process which takes roughly an hour," Huber told Bored Panda. "Convincing him to get dressed, actually getting dressed, getting down the stairs, getting into the car seat. All of these things take at least ten minutes with a two-year-old because they just have to move at their own pace. It's not always a bad thing, I'm glad my son enjoys playing and asking questions, and taking his time to look at things and be curious. But it can be frustrating when you're trying to go somewhere because you never know how long he will take and if you try to rush a two-year-old, it usually ends in screaming."

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Mad Dragon
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel this. If we went to a museum or a nice restaurant, our daughter would likely have a come-apart, and if we went to the kiddie bouncy castle place, she would have the best time while we were bored out of our mind.

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While virtually every parent is going through these things, according to Perri Klass, M.D., and the co-author of Quirky Kids, some do have it worse than others.

"If you have a child with a more challenging temperament, the truth is that you may have less fun parenting on a day-to-day basis for some of your child's life," Klass told Parents.

Which is kinda reassuring. That means it's completely normal to feel frustrated that your kid seems more difficult to manage than all three of your friend's kids combined. Or to be upset that your parenting is being unfairly judged by strangers and family who think they've done a better job.

#7

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James016
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son loves the diversity in different brown foods like fish fingers and chips.

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Aubrey
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also the fact that they won't remember a thing! (Whatever you do, don't take a young child to Disney world...)

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Tiger Pearl
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, did you ask the fish to stop staring and mind their own business?

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It's not just a question of perception. Science has already proven this. Research by Harvard University psychologist Jerome Kagan, Ph.D., suggests that an infant's temperament at birth is a good predictor of a child's behavior in adolescence.

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Kagan found that 40 percent of babies have a calm disposition (they're not overly ruffled by stimuli like light or noise), and years later, these kids actually remain chill.

However, as many as 15 to 20 percent of babies enter this world with a more "reactive" temperament, which can make their parents politely call them a "handful."

In Kagan's study, these babies recoiled from light and noise and were hard to soothe. So if you have a difficult baby, does this mean you are destined for an even tougher future? Not necessarily.

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May
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The rest of us thank you for keeping them out of restaurants until they're older

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Biofish23
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why is this not higher? So much this!!! It was easier to pack for a weekend away by myself, then it us to prepare for an afternoon out with 3 small kids.

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phil blanque
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We took our 5-year old on a hike, and she did want to go...complaining and complaining. Then she found a nickle on the trail...and then a dime...another nickle! There was no stopping her. We had a nice 30-minute hike, and it cost me less than $2.50.

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"There's always that nature-versus-nurture controversy," Nancy Snidman, Ph.D., director of the child development unit in psychology at the University of Massachusetts, Boston, who conducted the research with Dr. Kagan and continues to study the temperament of children, explained to the same outlet.

"Parents, other kids, and teachers can help shape a child's personality and coping skills over time." This basically means that what someone might consider good parenting may not have as much of an impact on babies, whereas older kids with a tougher temperament can benefit the most from it.

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"I don't think child-free people are clueless [about parents' struggles]," Lucy Huber said. "My tweet was about people with babies, which are more portable and have fewer options than toddlers, but still. I think it's just that before you have kids you think you'll be different than other parents and then it turns out you're really not because there's a reason other parents do things the way they do."

"Having kids is so much harder than you think it will be and for different reasons. I definitely thought I'd travel when I had toddlers but then you realize it's honestly not worth it. I think before you have kids there's this impulse to believe that you won't change your lifestyle when you have kids, as if changing your lifestyle is a sign of failure, but when you actually have kids you see that it's not a failure to change how you live, it's a privilege to adjust your life to this new person who has different needs than you."

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Huber said that as a parent, you learn to adapt to those needs, and in many ways, the transition becomes joyful. "I probably won't be traveling to Paris any time soon but I have found so much joy in showing my toddler simple things in the world, like a fish pond or a dog park. I don't need my son to see Notre Dame because he's still fascinated with simply going to the local library and when I get to see it through his eyes, I am too."

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Mikey Kliss
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Took a 6 hour trip last weekend. Drove at night so the 18 month old could sleep. He did not sleep and got so worked up near the end of the trip that he threw up

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kcanded
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand why parents put up with this with toddlers. I would tell my two kids at this age, no, we're not doing that because we need to ____. In a quiet but firm voice. And keep following up. Draw that line and stick to it. My daughter only threw two tantrums (thankfully at home) and I just ignored her. Walked over her to continue with the laundry. No reaction from me, no more tantrums.

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Mad Dragon
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I made up The Sunscreen Song to sing while I put it on my daughter (Tune of You Are My Sunshine). “You are my sunscreen, my only sunscreen. You protect me from harmful rays. I’ll never know just how much I need you! Please apply sunscreen every day!”

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While there are plenty of (opposing) parenting philosophies, research has found that kids who struggle more with negative emotions are most responsive to an empathetic yet structured and consistent parenting style.

But even if things don't go according to plan, experts remain hopeful; kids are more resilient than we sometimes give them credit for. And they love us. "One of the great things about life with small children is you get to wake up every morning and have a fresh start," Dr. Klass noted.

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Jackie Lulu
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At least they can dress themselves. You may not like what they're wearing, but at least you didn't have to do it.

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JMC5003
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mother-in-law was furious that I wouldn't take my 9 month old with stomach valve issues to her favorite Oriental restaurant while on vacation with her. Child would projectile vomit with absolutely no warning. Nope.

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Mika N
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just like I want to eat ice cream and cake all day and still be healthy. The logic of the world doesn't always get better as you grow up!

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A recent UK study revealed 15 to be the most difficult age to parent. I guess, for those who are still in the midst of sleep deprivation and terrifying tantrums, the idea that the worst is yet to come can strike fear in their already exhausted hearts. But even if there's no one around you to unload on, remember that Twitter — with millions of parents on it — is always waiting.

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Firefly
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's what my mom said. With one they just strapped me on their back and went hiking, etc. With two it was harder as they each had to take a child on their back so no more taking turns. With 3 they were done.

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Marianne
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Right! Just like the pediatrician who told me that if my baby is upset after the vaccination, I can nurse him in the treatment room, but I have to clear it in about 5 minutes. Lady, even without nursing I won't be out of here in 5 minutes.

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Queenie-Poo
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband desperately wants to go on a family camping trip. I'm totally down for it, but I absolutely will NOT go camping until our youngest is out of diapers. Period.

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Raven DeathShade
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The wonderful thing about Tiggers, is Tiggers are wonderful things. Their tops are made out of rubber, their bottoms are made of springs! They're bouncy, pouncy, trouncy, flouncy, fun fun fun fun fun! But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers is I'm the only one. IIIIIII'm the only one!

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