Choosing any sort of public transportation opens up a path for some awkward situations, but many are willing to take that risk for convenience or the sake of saving money. However, sometimes running into some strangers with malicious intent can surely change one’s mind. One woman on Reddit recently shared her own horror story from the subway, as she ran into a creepy guy on her way to a friend’s apartment. “I felt so anxious like throwing up so I stood up near a bunch of other people holding the rail” she recalled the experience.
Image credits: iwishmynamewasmarsha
Turns out, her fears weren’t baseless at all, as there are reports that NYPD has received around 1,024 reports of sex offenses in the transit system last year, and the number is alarming. The situation in New York can definitely spark fear in anyone’s (especially a woman’s) heart and self-defense tutorials, as well as defensive strategy tips related to public transport, are popping up all across the internet. However, this lady did not post her experience as a cautionary tale, but more as a thank you to one kind stranger that helped her in a time of need.
We’re glad that Michael stepped in to offer a helping hand to this woman, as he not only de-escalated the situation, but also took the time off his day to make sure she got to her friend’s place safely. As some people mentioned above, anyone can step in when such harassment happens and Michael’s actions are a great example on what to do, as sometimes one simply doesn’t know how to react.
Image credits: atsunori kohsaki
Here’s how people reacted to the story
Transport of London has addressed such issue in their video encouraging to report any unwanted sexual behavior on public transport
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Share on FacebookI've done this and similar things many times. Being 6'2", 240 lbs is a big advantage. Often it just means standing between the aggressor and victim or just saying, "Hey, long time no see!" with a big smile. I can still picture the thankful smiles I received as my reward.
Thank you for saying "people" and not just "men". As a woman, I love the idea of that last one from Argentina of women standing up for each other as well. We all need to have each other's backs.
Load More Replies...I saved a gril once in a similar situation. I was the only person in sight and thought to myself: oh well, he is one, we are two, which means 20 fingernails. We got this. I still hand out with that gril from time to time, been a few years already.
I think it's a damn shame that women, in the 21st century, are still facing situations that our prehistoric ancestors must have faced.
It's never going to change, unfortunately you can't weed out evil.
Load More Replies...That last one from danshun83 is a great idea. On the TV mini-series of "The Purge", there was a group of women called the "Matron Saints" who got together on Purge Night specifically to protect other women, stating that the majority of acts of violence that occurred that night happened to women. I'd join that group in a heartbeat.
Nice to know there are thoughtful people out there who recognise when someone is in a potentially dangerous situation and act, instead of ignoring it. With all the supposed sexist "insult," if a guy so much as holds a door open for a prickly feminist, I hope no-one (male or female) would be anything other than grateful for a stranger helping out when they are alone and having difficulties.
I’ve had similar things happen to me and there’s a strategy for dealing with this if no one notices...walk up to a group of people and flat out tell them that you’re going to stand/walk with them until the creep gives up. This does work, and most people will go along. ...///... I also ran into something interesting when we lived in Texas. A young black woman was in the same shoe store as me, and had been there longer. The sales clerk headed straight for me. I walked up to the younger woman and said, brightly, “Have you found the ones you want yet? Let’s get that size.” ...///... The clerk got a sour look on her face and helped the younger woman. Later I ran into her and she thanked me. I told her to forget it, I was just angry that I felt I needed to do it.
I once broke down on the side of the road with an empty fuel tank. I had to walk to the nearest fuel station and on my way back, a boy on a bike stopped and asked me if I was okay. A woman had pulled over and called him closer to explain that a man in a brown shirt was following me. She asked him to drive behind me and make sure I was okay. Thank you to the lady and young gentleman who kept an eye on me that day :)
I find it hard to believe that many men are this observant. It’s women who are primed to notice subtle threatening behaviour by men to women. You mention the fact that women feel anxious in certain situations and many men have literally no idea it’s even a thing, let alone being sensitive enough to spot it when it happens.
Hmm, maybe not. A lot of men certainly seem to see it as not problematic behaviour or even as someone just "making a joke" or something similar. But: isn't it worth it then to make men more aware of the ways of a predator? Isn't it important to even give thanks to those who do, "award" the right behaviour by thanking them if they do right? So often I read "but men aren't as sensitive and don't see it", but we (females) can't expect them to help if they don't see it! The men who don't understand will never help, because they simply don't SEE. So make them see. Especially encourage the "good guys" to make their brethren see. It's not that all men are blind, there are a good lot of them that see quite clearly, and another good lot that would help if they understood what#s going on. And of course the jerks who don't and won't do anything, but then again... in this story it was a GUY who helped the woman, not another woman. Just putting that out there
Load More Replies...Purple ribbon ideas sounds great! I accidently stood up for a young woman being sexually harassed recently and I felt like a better person afterwards. Do keep an eye out for it....
I've pretended to be my wifes friends boyfriend at least a couple times. Some dudes are like sharks, and a girl alone (single, dating, or married) is like bleeding baby seal. Lol I always apologize after becasue I know they can handle themselves, but playing boyfriend ends things real quick.
I've had similar happen to me, walking at night. A man was following me asking if my p*ssy was wet, other nasty stuff. I was passing a mosque just as people were coming out and there was a group of men chatting in front, I stopped and told them the man was harassing me. They shouted at him, shamed him and then had me stay with them until their families joined them, one family walked me home. I love Toronto, there are crappy people but way more good people.
Great story....but WHY is the advert photo a picture of a woman's a*s in tight fitting pants?
Lol actually, I scrolled back up to find an answer to your question, and the more I looked at it, I’m pretty sure that’s a man in tight women’s clothing. Not trying to be funny or rude or anything. It just looks like male body.
Load More Replies...I was at a bar one night with a group of people from work. When the bar closed, we were out in the parking lot talking when one of the girls saw a woman that had clearly had too much to drink. Two guys were trying to get her into a car and it was obvious by what she was saying that she didn't know either one of them. Me and another co-worker approached them and told them to leave her alone. They started to square off with us ready too beat our asses. That's when we heard a loud "BOOM!" The two guys dove into their car and sped out of there while my other co-worker and I helped the woman to call a friend to come pick her up. Turned out another co-worker, retired marine from Texas, reached in her truck, pulled out a shotgun and squeezed a round off to scare the sh*t out of the guys. When cops arrived, we explained the situation. They made her empty the shotgun and keep it in her truck. The cops offered to stay with the drunk woman until her ride arrived.
ALWAYS check the entire situation. A young man in Melbourne did this and ended up dying for his trouble.
Nice to see that there are good people out there after all!
I was waiting on the train platform in Long Island, NY with my now ex boyfriend. There was a female there in a white dress and some guy was clearly harassing her. I wanted to step in but she was cursing him out. In hindsight I still could've had her back. My dumbass ex boyfriend was basically s**t shaming her due to her dress. Never date down.
This should be SOP for humans - take care of fellow humans. We all feed off each others’ strengths, actions, attitudes. When one human stands up for another human, it encourages still other humans to do likewise in the future. We Earthlings should stick together! (Now, isn’t that better than refering to Men or Women, Blacks or Whites, New Yorkers or outsiders?)
I personally have not been bothered in this way. Or I don't remember. Montreal is a pretty safe city to live in. But I'm sure other women who are pestered by those jerks appreciate a helper like the guy in the story.
I've done this once in London with an older couple being threatened by a thug. Im not especially big but up for a rumble when required. Like all bully's he folded when it was clear there was a beating involved
One time, I live in Mexico City, I was in the metro, few people got in. I was siting in a sit next to the lane and a guy, who by the looks of his cloths, was not a nice fellow began to talk dirty to me. I got up and walk to the front of the cart but he began talking about me with a friend. I was scared and angry at the same time. In that moment an older gentleman got up and, without saying one bad word, told the guy to shoot up and be respectful with women. I don't know how he did it but the man and his friend didn't say a word.
This time last year, I witnessed something absolutely deplorable on a bus in my city. A man got on a nearly empty bus and made a point of stumbling into a seated woman, i watched him grab her between the legs and then fake another stumble while getting up to grab her full on with both hands on the chest. I made eye contact with him and he tried to ignore me, I did not break eye contact with him, he rushed to the back of the bus and started pulling the stop button violently to be let off. I had my phone open on my lap, so I switched to camera and got a full face picture of him and turned it over to the transit authority and the police. The story broke in the paper a few days later, that the police had received 14 complaints of assault of a sexual nature and they posted my picture asking people to help identify him. He was identified and last I heard the assault victims numbered in the 40's and it was all backed up by security cameras on the bus.
Awww what a great guy. I hope he does see this one day. I wish more men were honorable like this. A modern knight by his actions <3
There are some awesome people out there. We need lots more, too :) We're all in this together ;)
Although this ended well, it reminds me of a 'Tales of the Unexpected' episode that terrified me as a kid. This teenaged girl was being followed by an old man but was rescued by an old woman who shooed the man away. The old woman invited the girl into her house to calm her down.....then the old man came home! It terrified me so much it stuck in my head!
Wow it is so great to see that there are good samaritans in this world.
That commercial the small print saying that you may incur a charge for reporting unwanted behavior.... can we not come up with the technology to NOT charge someone reporting harassment??????
I applaud this woman for sharing, and the also the guy who spotted her distress and intervened. However, I take offence to the poster "Giedré" for her notion about public transportation: that "many are willing to take the risk (of P.T.) for the sake of saving money". Well actually, for a lot of people it's not a question of "being willing to", but simply a question of not having any other options. I don't have a car, like many people I can't afford it. Public transport is not a choice, it's the ONLY option I've got. Like many others. Yes that puts us in danger sometimes, but that's just one more downside to being working class. God bless the good fellow human beings who look out for one another.
I feel like if I tried to do this for another girl, we’d just both end up being harassed. But being a functional human I wouldn’t just leave her to the wolves or anything. I’m partly joking but also serious. Someone like that harasser would just see it like he got a bonus person to harass.
Sometimes I feel this too, but the truth is, more often than not, those creepers are also cowards, and just knowing that the girl isn't alone is enough to disrupt them and make them back off. You can also just help make sure that others around notice the situation, if you think that your help alone won't amount to much - like asking her out loud if the guy is harassing her so that everyone else around will pay attention to him too and he won't be able to make a move.
Load More Replies...big kudos. but you know what. i still wouldn't be comfortable with a stranger walking me home. even if he just proved himself to be a "guardian angel". i might be a little off the wall but... still i would wonder. no need to say it's glad to be wrong :)
I'm sure you have reasons for feeling like you do, but as a man it's stuff like what you wrote that make me not want to give a s**t anymore. We can't win. We exist and are near a girl then we are a threat. We help out and we're still making the girl nervous. Fuckit, you're on your own then. See how you feel when no guy helps you out next time.
Load More Replies...That’s very kind of him. Am I the only one who’d be expecting the second guy to try some s**t though? “I’m the nice guy, give me a shot,” type of thing. That’s so awful to say when this guy just wanted to help but women know how this is. Everyone constantly hitting on you and bothering you even when you think someone is just being friendly. It’s a s****y reality.
im 170.5 and 5 feet 6 1/2 inches and so i have been kinda rude here lately but before i got into this grandpa mood i always helped my mother she had this one guy break into her car then he saw me with (what he assumed was a real gun) my B-B Gun and i put the mag into it and shot a BB in the area he was then he ran off calling the cops because of my Bb gun and HELL IM ONLY 13 but he wound up getting arrested and the pic i added is the kind of cop car that came the ford F-150 images-cop...cbbc0f.jpg
i didnt get a real pic of the cop car that came but this definitely was what it looked like
Load More Replies...I think the point is that however vigilant you are there are a******s out there and no matter how "empowered" or whatever, simple fact is that people are preyed upon and it's just good to know that sometimes someone else is willing to help. You can preach how we you like about how society "should be". Fact is, it's not. Fact is the majority of men are physically stronger than women. Fact is that it's easier to overpower a woman. Even if another woman had been the one to step in here would have helped. This is not about a guy saving a woman this is about someone helping someone
Load More Replies...I don't understand why a randomer like you can't just be grateful for the good deeds of smart people out there. Also, not all women do this and not all the time. You would be surprised at how people of any gender, age, size etc. are just too afraid to get involved in a potentially dangerous, or simply inconvenient, situation. And even if that were true, that doesn't mean we should discredit anyone (regardless of gender) of their merit to help another human being, and effectively so. What you and I consider a decent person, does not indicate the frequency of running into such people. Sometimes just being a decent person makes you a real hero. So what?
Load More Replies...I've done this and similar things many times. Being 6'2", 240 lbs is a big advantage. Often it just means standing between the aggressor and victim or just saying, "Hey, long time no see!" with a big smile. I can still picture the thankful smiles I received as my reward.
Thank you for saying "people" and not just "men". As a woman, I love the idea of that last one from Argentina of women standing up for each other as well. We all need to have each other's backs.
Load More Replies...I saved a gril once in a similar situation. I was the only person in sight and thought to myself: oh well, he is one, we are two, which means 20 fingernails. We got this. I still hand out with that gril from time to time, been a few years already.
I think it's a damn shame that women, in the 21st century, are still facing situations that our prehistoric ancestors must have faced.
It's never going to change, unfortunately you can't weed out evil.
Load More Replies...That last one from danshun83 is a great idea. On the TV mini-series of "The Purge", there was a group of women called the "Matron Saints" who got together on Purge Night specifically to protect other women, stating that the majority of acts of violence that occurred that night happened to women. I'd join that group in a heartbeat.
Nice to know there are thoughtful people out there who recognise when someone is in a potentially dangerous situation and act, instead of ignoring it. With all the supposed sexist "insult," if a guy so much as holds a door open for a prickly feminist, I hope no-one (male or female) would be anything other than grateful for a stranger helping out when they are alone and having difficulties.
I’ve had similar things happen to me and there’s a strategy for dealing with this if no one notices...walk up to a group of people and flat out tell them that you’re going to stand/walk with them until the creep gives up. This does work, and most people will go along. ...///... I also ran into something interesting when we lived in Texas. A young black woman was in the same shoe store as me, and had been there longer. The sales clerk headed straight for me. I walked up to the younger woman and said, brightly, “Have you found the ones you want yet? Let’s get that size.” ...///... The clerk got a sour look on her face and helped the younger woman. Later I ran into her and she thanked me. I told her to forget it, I was just angry that I felt I needed to do it.
I once broke down on the side of the road with an empty fuel tank. I had to walk to the nearest fuel station and on my way back, a boy on a bike stopped and asked me if I was okay. A woman had pulled over and called him closer to explain that a man in a brown shirt was following me. She asked him to drive behind me and make sure I was okay. Thank you to the lady and young gentleman who kept an eye on me that day :)
I find it hard to believe that many men are this observant. It’s women who are primed to notice subtle threatening behaviour by men to women. You mention the fact that women feel anxious in certain situations and many men have literally no idea it’s even a thing, let alone being sensitive enough to spot it when it happens.
Hmm, maybe not. A lot of men certainly seem to see it as not problematic behaviour or even as someone just "making a joke" or something similar. But: isn't it worth it then to make men more aware of the ways of a predator? Isn't it important to even give thanks to those who do, "award" the right behaviour by thanking them if they do right? So often I read "but men aren't as sensitive and don't see it", but we (females) can't expect them to help if they don't see it! The men who don't understand will never help, because they simply don't SEE. So make them see. Especially encourage the "good guys" to make their brethren see. It's not that all men are blind, there are a good lot of them that see quite clearly, and another good lot that would help if they understood what#s going on. And of course the jerks who don't and won't do anything, but then again... in this story it was a GUY who helped the woman, not another woman. Just putting that out there
Load More Replies...Purple ribbon ideas sounds great! I accidently stood up for a young woman being sexually harassed recently and I felt like a better person afterwards. Do keep an eye out for it....
I've pretended to be my wifes friends boyfriend at least a couple times. Some dudes are like sharks, and a girl alone (single, dating, or married) is like bleeding baby seal. Lol I always apologize after becasue I know they can handle themselves, but playing boyfriend ends things real quick.
I've had similar happen to me, walking at night. A man was following me asking if my p*ssy was wet, other nasty stuff. I was passing a mosque just as people were coming out and there was a group of men chatting in front, I stopped and told them the man was harassing me. They shouted at him, shamed him and then had me stay with them until their families joined them, one family walked me home. I love Toronto, there are crappy people but way more good people.
Great story....but WHY is the advert photo a picture of a woman's a*s in tight fitting pants?
Lol actually, I scrolled back up to find an answer to your question, and the more I looked at it, I’m pretty sure that’s a man in tight women’s clothing. Not trying to be funny or rude or anything. It just looks like male body.
Load More Replies...I was at a bar one night with a group of people from work. When the bar closed, we were out in the parking lot talking when one of the girls saw a woman that had clearly had too much to drink. Two guys were trying to get her into a car and it was obvious by what she was saying that she didn't know either one of them. Me and another co-worker approached them and told them to leave her alone. They started to square off with us ready too beat our asses. That's when we heard a loud "BOOM!" The two guys dove into their car and sped out of there while my other co-worker and I helped the woman to call a friend to come pick her up. Turned out another co-worker, retired marine from Texas, reached in her truck, pulled out a shotgun and squeezed a round off to scare the sh*t out of the guys. When cops arrived, we explained the situation. They made her empty the shotgun and keep it in her truck. The cops offered to stay with the drunk woman until her ride arrived.
ALWAYS check the entire situation. A young man in Melbourne did this and ended up dying for his trouble.
Nice to see that there are good people out there after all!
I was waiting on the train platform in Long Island, NY with my now ex boyfriend. There was a female there in a white dress and some guy was clearly harassing her. I wanted to step in but she was cursing him out. In hindsight I still could've had her back. My dumbass ex boyfriend was basically s**t shaming her due to her dress. Never date down.
This should be SOP for humans - take care of fellow humans. We all feed off each others’ strengths, actions, attitudes. When one human stands up for another human, it encourages still other humans to do likewise in the future. We Earthlings should stick together! (Now, isn’t that better than refering to Men or Women, Blacks or Whites, New Yorkers or outsiders?)
I personally have not been bothered in this way. Or I don't remember. Montreal is a pretty safe city to live in. But I'm sure other women who are pestered by those jerks appreciate a helper like the guy in the story.
I've done this once in London with an older couple being threatened by a thug. Im not especially big but up for a rumble when required. Like all bully's he folded when it was clear there was a beating involved
One time, I live in Mexico City, I was in the metro, few people got in. I was siting in a sit next to the lane and a guy, who by the looks of his cloths, was not a nice fellow began to talk dirty to me. I got up and walk to the front of the cart but he began talking about me with a friend. I was scared and angry at the same time. In that moment an older gentleman got up and, without saying one bad word, told the guy to shoot up and be respectful with women. I don't know how he did it but the man and his friend didn't say a word.
This time last year, I witnessed something absolutely deplorable on a bus in my city. A man got on a nearly empty bus and made a point of stumbling into a seated woman, i watched him grab her between the legs and then fake another stumble while getting up to grab her full on with both hands on the chest. I made eye contact with him and he tried to ignore me, I did not break eye contact with him, he rushed to the back of the bus and started pulling the stop button violently to be let off. I had my phone open on my lap, so I switched to camera and got a full face picture of him and turned it over to the transit authority and the police. The story broke in the paper a few days later, that the police had received 14 complaints of assault of a sexual nature and they posted my picture asking people to help identify him. He was identified and last I heard the assault victims numbered in the 40's and it was all backed up by security cameras on the bus.
Awww what a great guy. I hope he does see this one day. I wish more men were honorable like this. A modern knight by his actions <3
There are some awesome people out there. We need lots more, too :) We're all in this together ;)
Although this ended well, it reminds me of a 'Tales of the Unexpected' episode that terrified me as a kid. This teenaged girl was being followed by an old man but was rescued by an old woman who shooed the man away. The old woman invited the girl into her house to calm her down.....then the old man came home! It terrified me so much it stuck in my head!
Wow it is so great to see that there are good samaritans in this world.
That commercial the small print saying that you may incur a charge for reporting unwanted behavior.... can we not come up with the technology to NOT charge someone reporting harassment??????
I applaud this woman for sharing, and the also the guy who spotted her distress and intervened. However, I take offence to the poster "Giedré" for her notion about public transportation: that "many are willing to take the risk (of P.T.) for the sake of saving money". Well actually, for a lot of people it's not a question of "being willing to", but simply a question of not having any other options. I don't have a car, like many people I can't afford it. Public transport is not a choice, it's the ONLY option I've got. Like many others. Yes that puts us in danger sometimes, but that's just one more downside to being working class. God bless the good fellow human beings who look out for one another.
I feel like if I tried to do this for another girl, we’d just both end up being harassed. But being a functional human I wouldn’t just leave her to the wolves or anything. I’m partly joking but also serious. Someone like that harasser would just see it like he got a bonus person to harass.
Sometimes I feel this too, but the truth is, more often than not, those creepers are also cowards, and just knowing that the girl isn't alone is enough to disrupt them and make them back off. You can also just help make sure that others around notice the situation, if you think that your help alone won't amount to much - like asking her out loud if the guy is harassing her so that everyone else around will pay attention to him too and he won't be able to make a move.
Load More Replies...big kudos. but you know what. i still wouldn't be comfortable with a stranger walking me home. even if he just proved himself to be a "guardian angel". i might be a little off the wall but... still i would wonder. no need to say it's glad to be wrong :)
I'm sure you have reasons for feeling like you do, but as a man it's stuff like what you wrote that make me not want to give a s**t anymore. We can't win. We exist and are near a girl then we are a threat. We help out and we're still making the girl nervous. Fuckit, you're on your own then. See how you feel when no guy helps you out next time.
Load More Replies...That’s very kind of him. Am I the only one who’d be expecting the second guy to try some s**t though? “I’m the nice guy, give me a shot,” type of thing. That’s so awful to say when this guy just wanted to help but women know how this is. Everyone constantly hitting on you and bothering you even when you think someone is just being friendly. It’s a s****y reality.
im 170.5 and 5 feet 6 1/2 inches and so i have been kinda rude here lately but before i got into this grandpa mood i always helped my mother she had this one guy break into her car then he saw me with (what he assumed was a real gun) my B-B Gun and i put the mag into it and shot a BB in the area he was then he ran off calling the cops because of my Bb gun and HELL IM ONLY 13 but he wound up getting arrested and the pic i added is the kind of cop car that came the ford F-150 images-cop...cbbc0f.jpg
i didnt get a real pic of the cop car that came but this definitely was what it looked like
Load More Replies...I think the point is that however vigilant you are there are a******s out there and no matter how "empowered" or whatever, simple fact is that people are preyed upon and it's just good to know that sometimes someone else is willing to help. You can preach how we you like about how society "should be". Fact is, it's not. Fact is the majority of men are physically stronger than women. Fact is that it's easier to overpower a woman. Even if another woman had been the one to step in here would have helped. This is not about a guy saving a woman this is about someone helping someone
Load More Replies...I don't understand why a randomer like you can't just be grateful for the good deeds of smart people out there. Also, not all women do this and not all the time. You would be surprised at how people of any gender, age, size etc. are just too afraid to get involved in a potentially dangerous, or simply inconvenient, situation. And even if that were true, that doesn't mean we should discredit anyone (regardless of gender) of their merit to help another human being, and effectively so. What you and I consider a decent person, does not indicate the frequency of running into such people. Sometimes just being a decent person makes you a real hero. So what?
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