They say you should never air your grievances, or be publicly smug, but what better place to show the world how clever you are than Twitter? After all, you're a married man now, and you have to prove to all your friends that you're the same Alpha Kappa Beta man you always were. Getting a divorce because your wife says you're too punny? "Divorce is strong with this one!"


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Bored Panda has put together this list of the best husband tweets that Twitter has to offer. Which one best sums up your marriage? Vote below, or share your own funny husband tweets in the comment below. Are you not just a husband, but a dad, too? Then be sure to also check out these funny parenting tweets! (h/t)

#1

Funny Husband Tweets

granttanaka Report

Frimpong Poku-Dankwa 6 months ago

hahahahahahhahhaaaaaa THIS IS SO SO TRUE! #icanrelate

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#2

Funny Husband Tweets

iwearaonesie Report

Jessica Carroll 6 months ago

#Icanrelate

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#3

Funny Husband Tweets

GrantTanaka Report

Jen Brant 6 months ago

I love this one.

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#4

Funny Husband Tweets

cheeseboy22 Report

Melody Lanzatella 6 months ago

i am going to steal this idea!

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#5

Funny Husband Tweets

XplodingUnicorn Report

Lonely Turtle 6 months ago

win!

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#6

Funny Husband Tweets

mynameisntdave Report

Linn Tara Lenby 6 months ago

Something tells me you done stuff like this before....hahahahhaa

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#7

Funny Husband Tweets

KentWGraham Report

Celia McDaniel 6 months ago

Haha! I mean...BOOOO!!!

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#8

Funny Husband Tweets

iwearaonesie Report

Kanishka Rajawansha 6 months ago

*Having second thoughts about buying milk.. or getting married*

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#9

Funny Husband Tweets

TheBoydP Report

Sandra More 6 months ago

THIS IS SO ME! !!

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#10

Funny Husband Tweets

KeetPotato Report

Emma Clark 6 months ago

Lol some of these remind me of Phil from Modern Family.

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#11

Funny Husband Tweets

KentWGraham Report

Marika Stanway 6 months ago

Because she's a good wife.

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#12

Funny Husband Tweets

ericsshadow Report

Celia McDaniel 6 months ago

OMG! I just realized that therapist also spells The Rapist! HAHA

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#13

Funny Husband Tweets

moooooog35 Report

Shana 6 months ago

BF doing the shopping for a change: "I don't get why you take an hour to do grocery shopping, I was done in 10 mins" Me: "did you get {item that was on the list}??" BF: "..... damn it" :P

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#14

Funny Husband Tweets

XplodingUnicorn Report

Robertus Ariel 5 months ago

My wife always ask me what i wanted for dinner and then says "NO, i don't want that" at all my choices

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#15

Funny Husband Tweets

yoyoha Report

Christian Hill 6 months ago

And then it is bitter and cold

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