Guy Illustrates How Boys Develop Sexism From Seemingly Small Interactions With Adults
Parents, teachers, and other people around them play a large role in a kid’s life, socialization, and development. A lot of what happens in childhood can matter for a lifetime, so it’s really important that everybody involved try their best to raise a mindful human being. However, it’s easy to mess up. After all, nobody’s perfect. What matters is recognizing these parenting mistakes and improving. Recently, artist Damian Alexander created a comic pointing out one specific area that he thinks everybody should pay more attention to when raising kids. Boys adoring female role models.
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And you couldn’t find a better person for the job. Damian grew up in a pretty artistic family and got a bachelor’s degree in Fine Art. Also, he experienced all of this first-hand. “Growing up, my favorite character was Matilda. She was so smart, and I related to her feeling out of place in her family,” Damian told Bored Panda. “The telekinesis thing was also really exciting for me. Then there’s Anne of Green Gables, Hermione from Harry Potter, Mary Poppins, Mulan, and so many more female heroes. I think it’s because girl characters tend to use creative problem solving instead of outright violence, and I found that a lot more engaging.”
His family never seemed to care much or take notice of it. “If I wanted a doll or something though, they’d direct me toward an action figure. They did it, complying with the social norms. Boys in my family would also turn up their nose if I wanted to play as Princess Peach in Super Smash Bros.”
And that’s the problem. Damian thinks that sexism, misogyny, homophobia, and gender bias are a huge part of why society thinks a boy shouldn’t look up to women. “A lot of men undervalue women and see them as less than. Probably because we have this toxic cycle of telling little boys they can’t admire women, and then having them grow up to disrespect women. A lot of parents also think if their son likes female superheroes, he’ll suddenly turn gay even though that’s not how that works at all.”
“Just let kids like what they like,” the artist said after being asked how society should break this gender role stigma. “If a little boy admires Elsa, just let him and don’t make a fuss about it. I’m so tired of seeing parents in the toy section direct their sons away from the doll aisle, saying, “Nope, that’s for girls!” Each time they’re planting the little seeds of misogyny in their kid’s head.”
After seeing Damian’s comic, people immediately started relating to it
I saw a boy about 2 years old holding a pink my little pony ball. At the checkout the mum realised the design of ball he had and said “I’m not getting you a pink ball, any other colour would be better”. The little boy looked so upset coz he didn’t understand that people see toys and images as gender specific. My 5yo son loves cars, trucks, boats, fire trucks, getting dirty etc but he also loves having his nails painted, wearing a lil make up when myself or my daughter wear it etc. My 13yo daughter loves fashion and “girly” stuff but she loves getting dirty, riding bikes (she used to do BMX racing), playing rough etc. I don’t give a s**t. I care about my kids happiness and if they are happy having opposite “gender” toys then so be it.
you're raising happy, confident, well adjusted children...thank you! there need to be more parents like this.
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Girls pick up on this as well. I avoided anything that could remotely be seen as feminine because I had equated femininity with inferiority. Femininity was frivolous and I wanted to be a hard-edged career woman. I was in my late 20s when it kind of hit me that I had been taught to loath part of my identity, my gender, a huge f*****g part of who I am even though I was (and still am) a strong feminist. But my younger form of feminism was adapting masculine qualities because I wanted to be a powerful woman while avoiding pink like a color matters in the slightest. Now I accept that femininity and masculinity are b******t, people are complex and have both traits and both traits have value. Compassion and leadership are both important and they are not exclusive on one or another gender.
This is so true. I ride motorcycles and worked in the motorsports industry, I always made a point of not dressing "girly" or wearing the kinds of riding gear that accentuated the fact that I was female. I'm so happy that the newest generation of female riders have amazing skills, no fear, and some dress like girls while others are more comfortable in guys gear. Things are slowly getting better, but they're still far from equal.
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This is spot on and so, so sad. Even more sad: even after this clear-as-day explanation, there will STILL be those that will dismiss and deny this, so it probably wont be changing anytime soon. You can't change what you don't acknowledge.
Sadly true. But it does help a little to bring awareness, then at least some families change over time. Hopefully that eventually would make it improved in the future, even if it's pretty far off. (Sorry had a duplicate comment earlier)
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I saw a boy about 2 years old holding a pink my little pony ball. At the checkout the mum realised the design of ball he had and said “I’m not getting you a pink ball, any other colour would be better”. The little boy looked so upset coz he didn’t understand that people see toys and images as gender specific. My 5yo son loves cars, trucks, boats, fire trucks, getting dirty etc but he also loves having his nails painted, wearing a lil make up when myself or my daughter wear it etc. My 13yo daughter loves fashion and “girly” stuff but she loves getting dirty, riding bikes (she used to do BMX racing), playing rough etc. I don’t give a s**t. I care about my kids happiness and if they are happy having opposite “gender” toys then so be it.
you're raising happy, confident, well adjusted children...thank you! there need to be more parents like this.
Load More Replies... Girls pick up on this as well. I avoided anything that could remotely be seen as feminine because I had equated femininity with inferiority. Femininity was frivolous and I wanted to be a hard-edged career woman. I was in my late 20s when it kind of hit me that I had been taught to loath part of my identity, my gender, a huge f*****g part of who I am even though I was (and still am) a strong feminist. But my younger form of feminism was adapting masculine qualities because I wanted to be a powerful woman while avoiding pink like a color matters in the slightest. Now I accept that femininity and masculinity are b******t, people are complex and have both traits and both traits have value. Compassion and leadership are both important and they are not exclusive on one or another gender.
This is so true. I ride motorcycles and worked in the motorsports industry, I always made a point of not dressing "girly" or wearing the kinds of riding gear that accentuated the fact that I was female. I'm so happy that the newest generation of female riders have amazing skills, no fear, and some dress like girls while others are more comfortable in guys gear. Things are slowly getting better, but they're still far from equal.
Load More Replies... This is spot on and so, so sad. Even more sad: even after this clear-as-day explanation, there will STILL be those that will dismiss and deny this, so it probably wont be changing anytime soon. You can't change what you don't acknowledge.
Sadly true. But it does help a little to bring awareness, then at least some families change over time. Hopefully that eventually would make it improved in the future, even if it's pretty far off. (Sorry had a duplicate comment earlier)
Load More Replies...
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